wracking my brain to deal. shame makes me revert back to wat i've done to make things go bad,must be my fault but want to share something before i go cry again. how do u get letters and things out of your head that someone you love and want in your life wrote to another love of theirs but makes u feel really small and unimportant. things left for me to read have caused me so much hate,pain and deep heatbreak because we all know when u love someone and they express love(and other things!) openly,it stays with u when u read it. my mind says don't go back over them,i saved them,my friends say that should make u want to stay away from him but it works the opposite. it's almost foolish,my fighter side says no. i want this back and my emotional side says this is making me feel suicidal. how to get things out of your head is all i ask. maybe brain washing,is that possible?
