eating, and still eating. make excuses to keep eating, stomach hurts, get food that soothes stomach, drink. confess to God that I indulged myself. when I sit down, my mind is on something. last night it was the dried cranberries that were sitting out of sight in the kitchen cupboard. it was just constantly on my mind, till I went and grabbed some. I would indulge myself. but I feel like almost all food is sin to me. sweets I told God were an idol to me, but I am not sure if that is true. or if I am just trying to excuse it as not being true because I REALLY want to indulge on sweets. I really want to get sweet drinks, sweet bars, sweet coconut covered in chocolate, cookies, whipped cream. it is such a temptation, even when they are not in sight. I could get something healthy instead of indulge on them. but, I don't know, I want to do a fast for God, but feel like I keep slipping up. I went to oatmeal, butter, and cinnamon to fill the gap I felt in my heart instead of God, so everything that I went to to fill that gap, I labeled as an evil food, when it is not. like custard. I made some to lean on it instead of God, now I feel like it is sin for me to eat custard again. I don't know, I have been through a lot of stuff lately, and recently felt a separation from God. so any advice? should I go on a boat in the middle of nowhere, and live off of beans, rice, pea protein powder, peas, and some form of oil and fat?