Smacking and the Law

[Evening Mist]

It seems to me that Christ is the best example we have of how God treats his children. I don't believe he made it a habit to "strike" the people in his care.

Because of the new covenant, we as people have been given the chance to be elevated to a higher standard in our relationships with each other. Including our relationships with our children. We are free to extend grace where we could not before. We are to guide and "disciple" our children in the gentle ways of Christ.

I don't see childrearing as a grand "social experiment." I see it as an important and foundational relationship between me and my child. Facets of a healthy relationship include trust, love, affection, boundries, and mutual respect. My child will base future relationships on the dynamics that are shared in his current relationship with his parents. Smacking, striking, hitting, and retaliation will not be a part of this relationship, and God willing -- not a part of his future relationships either.

The "rod" that was used for sheparding, btw, was never used for striking the sheep with. It was used to fend off predators, and the crook of the rod was used to guide the sheep. But it would have been a stupid, cruel, waste of time to hit a sheep with a rod.

My children are not my enemy. They don't need to be warded off or kept in line with beatings. What they DO need is constant and vigilant guiding and guarding. Thats my job.

 

[Svt4Him]

The "rod" that was used for sheparding, btw, was never used for striking the sheep with. It was used to fend off predators, and the crook of the rod was used to guide the sheep. But it would have been a stupid, cruel, waste of time to hit a sheep with a rod.

Actually this was used to knock the sheep when they got out of hand. How that becomes a stupid, cruel waste of time is beyond me. I guess you've never been around sheep. They're not the fluffy walking pillows you see on tv.

My purpose in spanking is to hurt my child. If I spank my child, and to him it's only a play time, I've taught him nothing.

 

[Tami]

I believe if you strike your child anywhere other than their bottom, with anything other than your hand, and if any marks are left on that child as a result, you've commited an offense that should be addressed by the authorities.

When I was a child I was spanked with hands and occasionally with a belt. I don't consider being spanked with a belt child abuse. I haven't done it. I haven't felt like I had a reason to do it. Some people prefer to only use paddles to spank their children with and not their hands because they feel that hands are for loving and paddles are for spanking and they don't want their children to be afraid of their hands. I don't consider that abuse either.

 

[Micaiah]

Actually this was used to knock the sheep when they got out of hand. How that becomes a stupid, cruel waste of time is beyond me. I guess you've never been around sheep. They're not the fluffy walking pillows you see on tv.

My purpose in spanking is to hurt my child. If I spank my child, and to him it's only a play time, I've taught him nothing.

I do not believe the passage suggests we use a six foot wooden pole to hit a three year old. That is child abuse.

Agree with the above thoughts. A smack with the hand on the bottom of a 9 year old boy is a joke. You may as well forget it.

Here are some quotes from a commentary by Charles Bridges (1794-1869) on the subject. That was back in the days when a good smack was fair game.

You need to read it slowly to unravel the truth, but I think you'll find it worth the effort.

The rule threfore is, not withstanding all the pleas of pity and fondness - withhold it not sic (smacking). Do work wisely, firmly, lovingly. Persevere not withstanding apparently unsuccessful results. Connect it with prayer, faith, and careful instruction.

We admit it is revolting to give pain, and call forth the tears of those we so tenderly love. But while hearts are what hearts are, it is not to be supposed we can train without discipline. If it be not asked - will not gentle means be more effective? Had this been God's judgement, as a God of mercy, he would not have provided a different regimen. Eli tried them, and the sad issue is written for our instruction. 'Must I be cruel to a child?'. Nay - God charges thee with cruelty if thou withhold correction from him. He goes on in his own foolishness. Except he be restrained he will die in his sin. God has ordained the rod to purge his sins, and so deliver his soul from hell. What parent then, that trembles for the child's eternal destiny can withhold correction

Extract from:

Bridges, Charles. 'A Commentary on Proverbs'.
The Banner of Truth Trust.
First published 1846, Reprinted 1994.
pp 413

 

[Tami]

That was good, Micaiah. No one says it better than Charles Bridges.

 

[mamaneenie]

Would you smack your children as in accordance with Scripture if there was the threat of legal action against you, even a jail sentence?

This thread is really only for those who do smack their children, and believe that is what Scripture exhorts parents to do.

I am not sure of the first question. It is a scary thought that some authorities are trying to make smacking illegal.

I smack my 2 yo on the hand, it is more a light tap. It does work though. I find that with cloth nappies, a smack on the bottom would be useless. Later on as he gets older, I am sure the discipline will change.

 

[Micaiah]

That was good, Micaiah. No one says it better than Charles Bridges.

Glad you liked it. I will post more in a while. Have you heard of the author before. I haven't. It was a commentary that was given to me, and I thought it had some good points if you could get past the old English

 

[Tami]

No, I hadn't heard of him before you posted that quote from him. What's the name of that commentary, by the way?

 

[Manda_24]

I think striking a child ANYWHERE with a stick or a strap IS criminal. That's crossing the line in my opinion. When I spank my children, it's not done with the intention of hurting them. It's done to get their attention, to let them know that I'm done asking them nicely to behave, it's time straighten up. And as others were saying, if they're in a dangerous situation and that danger needs to be impressed upon them (i.e. running into the street) then they might get a spanking.

I am not a parent nor do I plan to be for several years but I still have something to say.
I was spanked as a child and I don't think it was any kind of abuse, and I plan on disciplining my children in the same way. My dad even made a paddle out of a piece of wood 1/2 and inch thick, a belt was also used, or a ruler. I think it is a good way of discipling a child. If I said something I shouldn't have my mother sometimes smacked my mouth or washed it out. It may have hurt but we learned what not to do and we usually didn't do them again.
This is just my opinion and I don't feel that there is anything wrong with spanking a child with your hand or with something else.