Slipping again...

[saraharms1]

I feel like its a constant struggle with me now. Like I can't win for losing with anything. For a while things were going great. A lot of people think not much can happen to a 14 year old kid but they can and I'm proof of it. Although they are divorced both of my parents are druggy's and alcoholics. Since I was young I spent my time taking care of them and making them happy. My life has always been about taking care of those that I love and care about which would be my friends and family. Becoming a christian was a major change in my life but it was a good one although it is difficult to follow God's ways I still always have my eyes on him. My main problem is I used to do drugs, drink and cut myself. Drugs and drinking are no longer something I struggle with because more than anything I don't want to be like my parents but self harm is something I struggle with the most. Especailly since I decide to take anger out on myself rather than chance hurting someone by saying something to them or just fear of starting another argument. I had stopped for a long time... I slipped up again this time... because it feels like the weight of the world is on my shoulders once agian. I felt so guilty afterwards for not running to God like I have been doing so well with latly... I don't know how to explain the feeling but its like I could feel God's hurt. How it hurt him when I did it... I don't know... it sounds odd but now I'm not sure what to do... or if I should tell someone...

 

[Bamboo_Chicken]

Sarah, do you have someone in real life that you trust enough to talk to? If you go to church, it might be someone there. Most schools also have a school counselor and others you could talk to...honestly, finding someone to talk to really is worth it.

 

[AWorkInProgress]

Sarah, do you have someone in real life that you trust enough to talk to? If you go to church, it might be someone there. Most schools also have a school counselor and others you could talk to...honestly, finding someone to talk to really is worth it.

Amen.

Also try to figure out what are the triggers to this. Don't feel guilty about hurting god, for it's yourself your hurting. God loves us all, but he can only show you the door if you ask for it. It's you who have to walk thru it.

I think you are remarkible young girl to come this far on your own. You know what is right, try to grasp on to your rational thought of what is right and build conviction in it. Keep faith and hope my friend.

 

[Buttermilk]

s and s for you

Please find someone in real life to share this with.

 

[saraharms1]

Thanks everyone. I'm probably gonna talk to one of my youth pastors about it. A lot of them are always looking out for me so I thought I could go talk to them and I know they won't think any differently of me...


Thanks for your words of kindness and encouragment and of course your advice!



Sarah

 

[tapero]

MOD NOTE:

Moved from General Struggles to Self-Injury

 

[Bamboo_Chicken]

That's great Sarah! I'll be praying for you Hun .

 

[LazeyWinde]

I hope it goes well with your youth pastor Sarah. It helps to be able to talk about things. *hugs*