sleep crazy!

[Picture.Of.Obedience]

im going bonkers. i feed my son, burp him and get him to sleep, lay him down and 10 minutes later he is up. He will sleep for 3 hours on my chest, but zero in his bed....WHAT DO I DO...... i am so sleep deprived....

 

[Leanna]

Well... some people won't agree with me, but I will tell you how I got my baby to sleep through the night at a very early age. You have to be very consistant. I would never let my baby sleep on me during the night, only during day naps. I got all the extra cuddling in all day long so that at night he could learn to sleep on his own. If you get him used to sleeping on you of course he will prefer mommy. But soon he will get bigger and hurt your back so you should break the habit, at least at night, now. I remember it wasn't long before my son started hurting my back during day time naps on mommy.

First, I made sure the lights were dim around the house at night so that he could differ between night and day. Then, at night we would feed him, change him, and put him right back to sleep. We would never talk and never play with him no matter how awake he was at 2 am. I would never take him out of his room to the kitchen. For the first 2-3 weeks he would be awake at all hours wanting to play, and sleep during the day etc, but we refused to play at night and were only really boring. I also had to let him cry, which was really difficult, but my husband and I supported each other through it. It was hard to let him cry, for both of us, but it helped him learn to self soothe and get to sleep. I NEVER rocked him to sleep. I never put him to sleep with a bottle. I always laid him down awake but drowsy. So we would feed him, change him, and lay him down to sleep. Then if he cried, which he did, I would wait 5-8 minutes and go in and rub/scratch his back and say "its okay.." (really soft) or say nothing and then go back to my bed. I would lie there awake and wait 5-8 minutes, do it again. I would do that until he fell asleep. I got no extra sleep this way in the short run but in the long run it was very effective. IF he got really worked up(major crying) I would pick him up out of the crib and get him calmed down and then lay him back down. It was really really hard to stick with it, and I know some parents would say I should have stayed up all night and been available at his every whim and call but I don't believe that. I believe that my son can be supported, loved and know that I am there for him any time he needs me, without my needing to stay up every night all night for the first three years. I get frustrated with parents who have stayed up every night all three years and then get angry with me that my baby sleeps through the night. At night, I fed him and changed him, that's it. I rubbed his back. I love him completely and I did this as much for him as for me. Now at 10 1/2 months he sometimes wakes up with a start and cries. I wait a minute and usually he goes right back to sleep. Sometimes he needs mommy to come rub his back and say, "its okay.." but he doesn't need me to rock him, sleep with him, make an extra bottle, get his pacifier from where it fell out of his mouth, etc.... because those are not things he learned puts him back to sleep. His crib is his safe place and he looks all cuddly and relaxed when I put him in there at night. It was worth the crying I went through in the beginning to see him now....

 

[Linnis]

I know he's a little baby but you got to be firm or he'll never sleep in his own bed and he'll be four sleeping with you. Leanna has some really good advice and a lot of what I was going to type.

 

[Leanna]

I'm sorry I just realized how hard that is to read in all one paragraph. I hope it isn't too difficult. I would say it took 2-3 weeks for the major crying, then by 6 weeks he was sleeping 8-2am, feeding, right back to sleep 2:30-5:30, feeding, right back to sleep 6:00-7:30 then awake. By 8 weeks he did 7-9 hours before first feeding, three more hours of sleep then another feeding, then slept until 7:30ish. By 12 weeks he did 10 hours straight, 8pm to 6am. Yes I wrote all of this down, aren't I silly? I'm exact in my baby book keeping

 

[Princessperky]

Put him on your chest get soem pillows beside you (for your peace of mind) and go to sleep. (turn the phone off first)

Now that you have had a nap, research CIO, Fade out, Co Sleeping, and rocking for a time. Pick a method you like and stick to it. I did not like CIO, a child that young needs comfort, and needs security, and teaching a kid to cry themselves to sleep is not my idea of teaching them about how safe and secure my house is, so I used the fade out, but your kid.

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But whatever yo pick, do make midnight a quiet no play time like the PP said, helps adjust them to the grownup time schedule.

Oh yeah and I nursed and was too lazy for all the extrta work, and both my kids sleep in their own beds, one is 3, the other is 1.5, (and have been in their beds), don't let people scare you that if you let an infant stay they will never leave, if everything we let infants do never went away we would have a world full of crying, diaper wearing, cat napping night owl adults! (who only fall asleep with a nipple, or rocking chair)

 

[andiesmama]

We did CIO with Andie, but she was about 3 months old...I didn't have to break her of falling asleep on me, I made the mistake of getting her used to falling asleep in her swing! :o

 

[Picture.Of.Obedience]

he did good last night!!!!!! whoo hoo!!!

thanks for all the good advice. at night all the lights are dim & i dont talk to him at all, (b/c im half asleep...lol) so he eats and goes right to sleep (on good nights...lol)

 

[Leanna]

I think I had a perpetual sleep deprivation headache for who knows how long.... but when he gets older, every month, it will get better. I love my son's age, 10 1/2 months, but I hear that its even better once he's old enough not to put everything in his mouth. So I am looking forward to that.

 

[Picture.Of.Obedience]

I think I had a perpetual sleep deprivation headache for who knows how long.... but when he gets older, every month, it will get better. I love my son's age, 10 1/2 months, but I hear that its even better once he's old enough not to put everything in his mouth. So I am looking forward to that.

thanks for the positive encouragement!

 

[Linnis]

I think I had a perpetual sleep deprivation headache for who knows how long.... but when he gets older, every month, it will get better. I love my son's age, 10 1/2 months, but I hear that its even better once he's old enough not to put everything in his mouth. So I am looking forward to that.

My nephew's seven and I still have go "Don't put your fingers in your mouth" or "don't put that in your mouth," now that he's well beyond the age of tasting everything if it goes in his mouth, it's on top of the fridge for a while...He's getting better but I haven't kicked the habit yet.

 

[vscola]

I don't have any advice, but it gets better! Christian is about 3 and a half months old and has been sleeping 6-8 hour stretches at night for about 2 weeks now. Hang in there! It will get better soon!

 

[bliz]

We shared a family bed (eventually queen and full-sized beds shoved together on the floor) with our three kids. Once we were past colic, we all slept well and were very happy. We think it was one of the best things we did as parents. I know - many think this is awful and would never dream of it, or think they won't get any sleep, but we loved it.

 

[Leanna]

what method did I use?? does it have a name??

 

[ShannonMcCatholic]

I know he's a little baby but you got to be firm or he'll never sleep in his own bed and he'll be four sleeping with you. Leanna has some really good advice and a lot of what I was going to type.

Just a note- I didn't do any of that and none of my oldest three (ages 7-2)are still in bed with us-- just the baby.

My advice is do whatever you need to do to be able to be the best mom you can be. You know yourself, and you know your baby--better than anybody else in the whole world. Trust yourself, and remember it is NOT your job to make sure your baby never cries, but rather it is your job to make sure his needs are being met and to love him.

Temprament really matters in the area of sleep- I have had a couple of horrible sleepers and a couple of great sleepers- but it has had to do with them- with their personalities- and nothing at all with what I did or didn't do.

And just remember- it will not last- your son wll start sleeping better. Just hang in there- sleep when you can! And if you really need it- then have someone take him for a few hours so you can sleep without listening for him!

 

[Leanna]

The trouble with a pacifier at night is when it falls out you have to go put it back in. Parents who allowed their baby to sleep with one have complained about this, so I listened to them and didn't make that mistake. Possibly that is one reason why she wakes up after only a few hours... I did swaddle David when he was a newborn but he grew out of it within a month or so...

 

[Picture.Of.Obedience]

thanks for all the good advice. i guess he has his good and bad nights. night before last he slept great in his own bed and last night didnt sleep a wink.... pacifire or not... i try it all the time and he doesnt like it..lol....

i think the more he is awake in the day the better the night is.... how do you keep them awake though???

 

[Leanna]

Okay, well maybe you're right Blue. Maybe next time I will try the pacifier if I have trouble. David never liked it until THIS month, crazy huh? Although he doesn't use the pacifier in the classic sense, he just thinkts its neat to look at and then chews on it upside down. He doesn't suck on it for very long, I think he maybe likes it for teething and entertainment purpose.

It is impossible to keep a new baby awake who wants to sleep. I had trouble with that too when it came to getting that baby awake to breastfeed. No matter if there were 2 nurses and mommy rubbing his feet and making him naked, he would still sleep. There is definitely a lot of sleep needed right now, I'd say just give him stimulation when he's awake during the day, but not at night. After a while it will even out. Last night when my husband and I peeked at David before going to sleep he had his eyes open and looked at us. Oops! So I rubbed his back and he smiled and we left. He just kind of knows that night is for sleeping and no one plays with him then I think. After a while all babies realize that.

 

[Picture.Of.Obedience]

yeah i think Trevor is slowly getting the hang of this sleep thing....no more sleeping with mommy!!! It is so hard though..lol.... but i will do anything to not have a little kid in our bed for years to come.

 

[Leanna]

Cuddle lots during the day time. David and I still cuddle and hug and kiss on the cheek a lot!! Babies definitely need touch, but there are lots of ways to do it during the day and not during sleeping hours (but for those who do co sleep that's okay with me, I'm just saying...)

 

[Picture.Of.Obedience]

yeah we cuddle lots during the day.......its so easy to fall asleep burping him or something though..lol