Single and hitting 50!

[SandyLou]

I thought Tina Louise looked like she'd had a little work done. . . . but WOW! Didn't Cybill Shepherd look great? (she's my age)

soooo a co-worker said you LOOKED 25 and now you think you might try dating 25 yr olds? Hmmm . . . .and this would be . . . why?
for appearance sake?
because you have something in common?

And I'm not picking on you, Donnie - that just kinda summarizes my question though. Why would a 40 (or 50) something yr old man be interested in dating someone 15 years younger? And is that interested in "casual dating" or interested in forming a "relationship"?

By the WEIGH (get it?), congrats on losing weight. I personally didn't think you needed to - I like you just the way you are But since you mentioned it, tell me your secret!

 

[JPPT1974]

I like older men myself so don't feel bad. I always liked men in their 40-50's because they act more maturer and more sympathetic. No offense to the younger generation but older men tickle my fancy for many, many, reason.

 

[Donny_B]

Why would a 40 (or 50) something yr old man be interested in dating someone 15 years younger? And is that interested in "casual dating" or interested in forming a "relationship"?

One could just as well ask the question "why not". All other things remaining equal, perhaps the most practical reason is that I could still have my own family. But then again, do I want to go through all those sleepless nights of a baby crying and changing diapers, etc, etc. and the financial pressures of supporting a family. Many a couple can't wait for the day that their kids are finally grown up and off to college and all the bills are paid...I could just skip that part altogether! But then again, look at the rewards I would be missing that raising children entails, not to mention the grandchildren and great-grandchildren, and the love I would give and receive.

It's a tough choice. Maybe those who have no choice have it easier....

 

[Donny_B]

By the WEIGH (get it?), congrats on losing weight. I personally didn't think you needed to - I like you just the way you are But since you mentioned it, tell me your secret!

Thanks, it's mainly been watching what I eat and walking at least 3 miles a day.

 

[Starcradle]

Why would a 40 (or 50) something yr old man be interested in dating someone 15 years younger? And is that interested in "casual dating" or interested in forming a "relationship"?

With all due respect, Sandy Lou--I would hope the older men who have been interested in me discovered some manner of substance in my character and were not solely seeking a "casual affair," most especially when I do not lend myself to that manner of exchange. As you are probably well aware, both maturity and immaturity can be discovered within all age ranges and are not limited to a specific chronological age. I do not take for granted the generational differences between older men/younger women and vice versa, yet what I deem of most importance is an alignment of core values, transcendent of superficial commonalities. Nevertheless, it ultimately depends upon the persons involved. I generally get along very well with older men and can retain highly stimulating conversations with them despite our differences in age. Unfortunately, I discover this is a bit more difficult to accomplish with younger men. I do not wish to generalize, yet in my experience the theory of women maturing more quickly than men has proven true, although I am certain there are exceptions.

In the end, we all possess opportunities to learn from one another if we will only humble ourselves and not believe we "know it all" because of our age, status, education, etc. (When you know the Lord, you truly discover what little wisdom you have!)

 

[Donny_B]

I thought Tina Louise looked like she'd had a little work done. . . . but WOW! Didn't Cybill Shepherd look great? (she's my age)

Gilligan sure did age..but I thought Mary Ann, Ginger, and Cybill Shepherd all looked great!!

 

[SandyLou]

I would hope the older men who have been interested in me discovered some manner of substance in my character and were not solely seeking a "casual affair," QUOTE]


YIKES! Who said ANYthing about affairs??! Not me! I thought this was a Christian site!
Starcradle, I'm just curious why men hitting 50 seem MORE interested in younger women. If it is a matter of energy? Or phyiscal appearance? Intellect? Wanting child-bearing? Financial? or. . . . .???
I'm certainly NOT judging anyone - male or female! Just curious - this is only a forum,Starcradle - for an exchange of ideas. Starcradle

--SandyLou

 

[SandyLou]

One could just as well ask the question "why not". All other things remaining equal, perhaps the most practical reason is that I could still have my own family. But then again, do I want to go through all those sleepless nights of a baby crying and changing diapers, etc, etc. and the financial pressures of supporting a family.

That's an excellent point Donnie!
And now that you mention it, I do know a couple men in their mid-50's trying to now be single dads to 4 and 5 yr old children because their "later in life" marriages didn't work out.
Thanks Donnie! As usual, you offer extreme wisdom and honesty.
(and good taste in television. . . . )

--SandyLou

 

[Starcradle]

Yes, a forum where ideas are presented, which is what I offered in my post. You referred to "casual dating" in one of your previous comments, which certainly does not imply a serious relationship. I was merely stating that an older man dating a younger woman does not always have to involve such superificial reasons. It appeared that you were at least slightly perturbed or incredulous that an older man would desire a relationship with a younger woman, and I apologize if I was under an erroneous impression in assuming that.

Anyway, I apologize if my words were received in the wrong fashion, they were certainly not designed to offend!

 

[SandyLou]

You referred to "casual dating" in one of your previous comments, which certainly does not imply a serious relationship. I was merely stating that an older man dating a younger woman does not always have to involve such superificial reasons.

ooooo okay. . . .I guess I misunderstood the previous use of the word "affair". We have different definitions of casual relationship probably. I totally agree with you, that it depends on the people involved.
Yes, I am a bit confused at the number of middle aged men on "singles sites" who are not interested in even chatting with someone their own age(or even NEAR). Absolutely there are many fall/spring relationships- and GREAT ones! But again, to "advertise" for ONLY women 15 yrs plus partners is confusing. I was hoping some honest men would educate me. . . .DonnieB has offered great insight into the male way of thinking.

--SandyLou

 

[oldrooster]

I am 40 and will only date ladies that are close to my age, I find them far more attractive than children, plus I really would like to have somebody that has comparable life experiences.

 

[SandyLou]

Thanks Rooster! I have to agree with you, having once dated a person 8 yrs younger. . . .WOW! so many life experiences that we couldn't share! Memories of popular TV shows, music, cars, slang expressions - - and on and on.

--SandyLou

 

[Donny_B]

I am sure someone born in the 70s or 80s would love you to share your experiences of the 60s with them firsthand (like groovy!!) . And a lot of the television programs from back then can now be seen on cable TV.

But the experience of seeing Elvis (from the waist up) and the Beatles (with the screaming girls in the audience) on the Ed Sullivan Show for the first time was a unique experience that is hard to describe unless you were there (I was very young during all this, but I do barely remember it!)

The 50s were before my time, but I do remember Happy Days (Aaaay!) and Laverne and Shirley, which were supposedly based in the 50s (although the hairstyles looked more like the 70s??what was up with that??). And of course, there's I Love Lucy and the Honeymooners still seen on cable in reruns.

 

[SandyLou]

Donnie - you are sooooo cool! You have SUCH an interesting slant on things!
I just hit 50 last month so I was a mere babe in THE 50's. Like you, my images of that era are from TVLand & Nick@Nite *giggling*


Thanks!
SandyLou

 

[Starcradle]

Yes, I am a bit confused at the number of middle aged men on "singles sites" who are not interested in even chatting with someone their own age(or even NEAR).

That is unfortunate, and I can comprehend why you are disheartened. By excluding individuals nearer to their age, they are indeed limiting themselves from enjoying what could be very rewarding experiences. I know that I have been greatly disturbed at automatically being dismissed due to my chronological age--judged by that over which I have no control instead of by that which matters most: substance of character.

 

[wildthing]

It's all about energy. What I am looking for is someone who will ski the whole mountain with out complaint about it being cold or it hurts. And have enough energy to go out at night. Many people this age are afraid to try new stuff to learn new stuff this goes both ways. Stuck in a rut I guess.

But really we need something more than this. It is not energy it's an attitude. If it's not attitude it's not being flexable.

To stay young is to learn new things. Hang out with young and be brave when trying stuff. If you do these things guys will love you no matter what your age is.

 

[Evee]

Why is it that men my age are looking for MUCH younger women?
Just wondering if anyone has any theories about this.

Thanks for any and all responses!

His hands & feet,
SandyLou

Because they are scared of growing old.
They like to be seen with a younger woman they think that makes them appear younger.
Consider going with younger men.
Many younger men in this area any way like older women.
My friend is married to a man 15 years younger and very happy and been maried for a few years.
They love each other very much.

 

[SandyLou]

I know that I have been greatly disturbed at automatically being dismissed due to my chronological age--judged by that over which I have no control instead of by that which matters most: substance of character.

ahhhhhhhhhhh. . . . you see my point then!
Yes, most of my friends are 15 to 20 yrs (and some even MORE!) younger than I am chronologically. As friends we have mutual respect for the differences in experiences. . . . and can still laugh and do things together.
However in a mate I am looking for someone closer to my own age - who can also adapt to my eclectic group of friends and activities.


SandyLou