• Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.

  • CF has always been a site that welcomes people from different backgrounds and beliefs to participate in discussion and even debate. That is the nature of its ministry. In view of recent events emotions are running very high. We need to remind people of some basic principles in debating on this site. We need to be civil when we express differences in opinion. No personal attacks. Avoid you, your statements. Don't characterize an entire political party with comparisons to Fascism or Communism or other extreme movements that committed atrocities. CF is not the place for broad brush or blanket statements about groups and political parties. Put the broad brushes and blankets away when you come to CF, better yet, put them in the incinerator. Debate had no place for them. We need to remember that people that commit acts of violence represent themselves or a small extreme faction.
  • We hope the site problems here are now solved, however, if you still have any issues, please start a ticket in Contact Us

Sexual Repression

Colleen1

Legend
Feb 11, 2011
31,066
2,301
✟71,731.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Private
Relationships ... friendship is the prerequisite to dating, intimacy, marriage....
If you are not friends, if you don't enjoy things together (sports, fishing, movies, walks) will slow and fail...as 5 out of every 7 seem to....wrong thing , for wrong reason, at wrong time...

Sex is the "icing" on the cake, part of the glue that holds the marriage together. If all you have is sex, won't work...at some point deviate from normal desires, to "mix it up", get back your groove...spice things up... don't work, not about the "thrill and oey gooey stuff", about long term platform to build a future, vision, goals, kids, home, retirement, grandkids, community.... Marriage being the corner stone.

Sex when it comes first, produces kids, single moms, misery, flawed kids without mom or without dad .... 3.30-5.30 to hang out with other "latch key kids"... a problem awaiting to happen...

Not about dress, decorations, church, number of guests, about commitment to one another and commitment to God, the "3-fold" cord not easily broken...a promise in His house, before witnesses (to remind you when honey moon is over), that this is the one forsaking all others, forsaking a night out with girls or boys, seeking to build a new life, sharing , caring, and learning, one about the other

Sex is simple, any living thing can do it... but marriage is quite another story...consequences, responsibilities, destiny, kids and legacy....

Very well said. Yes, it is the icing on the cake of more solid things. :) :thumbsup:
 
Upvote 0

Stephen Kendall

believer of Jesus Christ
Sep 28, 2008
1,387
112
USA
✟24,673.00
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
Married
Politics
US-Others
From my view the protestant Christian church in America focused too much on the sin and not enough on the character of a Christian. Sex is not an urge that can be suppressed. Paul was clear that if you feel the need for sex get married and have at it. Don't try to fight it because you're going to lose. Unfortunately getting married today doesn't mean you're going to get sex (or much of it) so in the end I don't have an answer for you. Married people don't have the service mentality that Paul described. Our culture has taught us to serve our own needs first and that's just not working.

The needs of a man were to be met by his wife and vice-versa. That isn't so today. We have the male body and it's cycles and needs that are being ignored by the woman in the marriage. Today's modern marriage isn't about meeting these needs, but about selfish fulfillments. Did not God tell us that in the latter days, people would lovers of themselves? Is a man a lover of himself when his wife isn't to him, when he masturbates to relieve his built-up biological cycle? I am sure that men act much the same to their wife's by not seeking out to fulfill her needs. Marriage is really about unselfishness. Men and women have biological and mental needs that are to be filled through marriage. It may seem like work, well marriage is filled with work. Let us do our work, even the biological type. The clothes and dishes are constantly building, as is the rumble of kids storms of toys and noise through the house. Just love it.

Could it be a litmus test of your love for God, as to your love for your spouse and marriage? I believe the answer is yes.
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0

seeingeyes

Newbie
Nov 29, 2011
8,944
809
Backwoods, Ohio
✟42,860.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
The needs of a man were to be met by his wife and vice-versa. That isn't so today. We have the male body and it's cycles and needs are being ignored by the woman in the marriage. Today's modern marriage isn't about meeting these needs, but about selfish fulfillments. Did not God tell us that in the latter days, people would lovers of themselves? Is a man a lover of himself when his wife isn't to him, when he masturbates to relieve his built-up biological cycle? I am sure that men act much the same to their wife's by not seeking out to fulfill her needs. Marriage is really about unselfishness. Men and women have biological and mental needs that are to be filled through marriage. It may seem like work, well marriage is filled with work. Let us do our work, even the biological type. The clothes and dishes are constantly building, as is the rumble of kids storms of toys and noise through the house. Just love it.

Could it be a litmus test of your love for God, as to your love for your spouse and marriage? I believe the answer is yes.

It's true that 'just wait till marriage' doesn't solve these problems. The two don't become one just by signing a piece of paper and living in the same building.

Marriage isn't a magic spell that poofs sin into not-sin.
 
Upvote 0

Colleen1

Legend
Feb 11, 2011
31,066
2,301
✟71,731.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Private
The needs of a man were to be met by his wife and vice-versa. That isn't so today. We have the male body and it's cycles and needs that are being ignored by the woman in the marriage. Today's modern marriage isn't about meeting these needs, but about selfish fulfillments. Did not God tell us that in the latter days, people would lovers of themselves? Is a man a lover of himself when his wife isn't to him, when he masturbates to relieve his built-up biological cycle? I am sure that men act much the same to their wife's by not seeking out to fulfill her needs. Marriage is really about unselfishness. Men and women have biological and mental needs that are to be filled through marriage. It may seem like work, well marriage is filled with work. Let us do our work, even the biological type. The clothes and dishes are constantly building, as is the rumble of kids storms of toys and noise through the house. Just love it.

Could it be a litmus test of your love for God, as to your love for your spouse and marriage? I believe the answer is yes.

I don't think it's one or the other. Takes two to be in a marriage. Many times sex is an expression of caring...if someone feels cared about and able to trust.

...and above all else we should be seeking to please God.
 
Upvote 0

bhsmte

Newbie
Apr 26, 2013
52,761
11,792
✟254,941.00
Faith
Atheist
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Others
I guess one would have to ask themselves this question:

Why does the human body have a biological and or emotional need for sexual satisfaction? Science and psychology have established, that males have more of a physical need for sexual satisfaction and females have more of an emotional need for the same. This is assuming, we are talking about people who are physically and emotionally healthy individuals.
 
Upvote 0

harvester77

Newbie
Nov 21, 2011
256
7
london
✟30,567.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
It seems as though alot of Christians equate sex or anything having to do with it with all what is typically against Christianity (pornography, pedophilia, homosexuality, etc.).

Let's face it. We deal with sexual feelings all the time. As much as we feel hungry, feel we need to poo, etc., sometimes we feel the need for pleasures of the sex variety (hopefully with one's spouse).

Oftentimes though I hear stories of people who are afraid of sex, and almost always from a family that crams religion and doesn't mention about sex at all. It can be very dangerous, as it can also result in the opposite and all it entails.

My mom failed to teach me about sex and almost never mentioned about it. Whenever I thought about sex, I tried avoiding it, though at the same time had a unfleeting curiosity about it. I'm still working on getting the whole gist of it not being an uncomfortable and negative topi

The point of this thread is two things:

1.), How did Christianity get to the idea that sex is a bad thing? (rather than something to be responsible with)

2.), Have you been repressed and what was your path to finding tranquility between your religious matters and sexual matters?

What you on about? Sex is good, it clearly says in bible, what is not good is sleeping around, orgies, using sex as power, porn can lead to unrealistic expectations etc. Nothing weird about that! Its quite easy to understand. I imagine you are probably about 15 years old and still have lots of learn.
 
Upvote 0