Sexual Repression

[korvus]

It seems as though alot of Christians equate sex or anything having to do with it with all what is typically against Christianity (pornography, pedophilia, homosexuality, etc.).

Let's face it. We deal with sexual feelings all the time. As much as we feel hungry, feel we need to poo, etc., sometimes we feel the need for pleasures of the sex variety (hopefully with one's spouse).

Oftentimes though I hear stories of people who are afraid of sex, and almost always from a family that crams religion and doesn't mention about sex at all. It can be very dangerous, as it can also result in the opposite and all it entails.

My mom failed to teach me about sex and almost never mentioned about it. Whenever I thought about sex, I tried avoiding it, though at the same time had a unfleeting curiosity about it. I'm still working on getting the whole gist of it not being an uncomfortable and negative topic.

The point of this thread is two things:

1.), How did Christianity get to the idea that sex is a bad thing? (rather than something to be responsible with)

2.), Have you been repressed and what was your path to finding tranquility between your religious matters and sexual matters?

 

[CityOfGod]

I have no idea what you're talking about.

 

[Gregory Thompson]

It seems as though alot of Christians equate sex or anything having to do with it with all what is typically against Christianity (pornography, pedophilia, homosexuality, etc.).

Let's face it. We deal with sexual feelings all the time. As much as we feel hungry, feel we need to poo, etc., sometimes we feel the need for pleasures of the sex variety (hopefully with one's spouse).

Oftentimes though I hear stories of people who are afraid of sex, and almost always from a family that crams religion and doesn't mention about sex at all. It can be very dangerous, as it can also result in the opposite and all it entails.

My mom failed to teach me about sex and almost never mentioned about it. Whenever I thought about sex, I tried avoiding it, though at the same time had a unfleeting curiosity about it. I'm still working on getting the whole gist of it not being an uncomfortable and negative topic.

The point of this thread is two things:

1.), How did Christianity get to the idea that sex is a bad thing? (rather than something to be responsible with)

2.), Have you been repressed and what was your path to finding tranquility between your religious matters and sexual matters?

Christianity got that way because Jesus in the bible was celibate . Paul was celibate and their words make up most of the NT . after the first generation socially awkward scholars took over the administration of the church . and there was the neo levitical thing . so it was generally inevitable .

 

[ProudMomxmany]

Hmmm....maybe if we'd had a more repressed attitude about sex we wouldn't have had so many kids...or maybe a bunch of kids is what happens when you're young and broke.

 

[JennetteLibby]

if any christian thinks that sex is bad then why does he go for it, better leave it and become impotent;/ its a part of life dont misuse it or miss it

 

[thesunisout]

I don't think Christians have any problem with sex except when it is outside of marriage. The bible approves of sexual relations between a husband and wife and even says they should never withhold sex from one another unless it is agreed upon for a time of prayer and fasting. The marriage bed is undefiled, but everything outside of Gods design is sin and we can see the results of that in our corrupt western culture.

 

[trentlogain2]

it starts in the family. not the church.

 

[abysmul]

Christianity is the largest religion in the world isn't it? There's like over 2 billion Christians in the world... sounds like sex isn't a problem.

 

[mandyangel]

The point of this thread is two things:

1.), How did Christianity get to the idea that sex is a bad thing? (rather than something to be responsible with)

I have no idea.

2.), Have you been repressed and what was your path to finding tranquility between your religious matters and sexual matters?

I think I have been repressed with it but I've dealt with that by beating it and maybe even going a little overboard at times in how sexually expressive I can be. I think its really important to remain a virgin but sexuality sometimes is just sometimes something you need to express. Me and my gfs have done this through preforming and dancing and getting out our sexual energy that way. We have done a lot of things that I probably shouldn't say here in front of people to come to terms with our sexuality and help us figure it out and grow in the meantime. In my opinion, you shouldn't be ashamed of your body, after all God hand made it for you himself and as long as you don't go fully naked, its okay to express yourself. But that's just my opinion.

 

[Bobby64]

How did Christianity get to the idea that sex is a bad thing? (rather than something to be responsible with)

An old minister of mine commented on that. He said, "We should be telling our kids, 'Wait, wait, wait,' not 'no, no, no.'" He's known some older couples who think that it's okay to have sex only if you're doing so to get a child.

I think it's because the amount of premarital, recreational sex keeps rising, and Christianity has to be so vocal about it that it sometimes forgets to emphasize the beauty of sex within marriage.

 

[Pteriax]

we need to poo

Morgan Freeman reads Everyone Poops (With HD accompanying video) - YouTube

1.), How did Christianity get to the idea that sex is a bad thing? (rather than something to be responsible with)

It didn't as far as I know.

2.), Have you been repressed and what was your path to finding tranquility between your religious matters and sexual matters?

No, so it's a non issue for me.

 

[Stephen Kendall]

The point of this thread is two things:

1.), How did Christianity get to the idea that sex is a bad thing? (rather than something to be responsible with)

2.), Have you been repressed and what was your path to finding tranquility between your religious matters and sexual matters?

1.) They made God a little different than he made us. That is a mistake. We should accept how he made us and that we reflex his image. Sex isn't bad, just like you said, something that we are responsible for.

2.) Yes, much so. Read lots of Christian self-help books on the subject helps a lot. Praying continually. Being responsible and committed to being decent & moral in any sexual thought or action. I now thank my Father for my wife, even when I am with her in bed. I find no offense with sex at all. It is a wonderful pleasure given to us for our marriage and to us individually being responsible, of course.

 

[Wings like Eagles]

I don't think Christians have any problem with sex except when it is outside of marriage. The bible approves of sexual relations between a husband and wife and even says they should never withhold sex from one another unless it is agreed upon for a time of prayer and fasting. The marriage bed is undefiled, but everything outside of Gods design is sin and we can see the results of that in our corrupt western culture.

Well said!

 

[Sketcher]

You eat, I would hope, in moderation. You poo, I would hope, on the toilet. In the same way, you are only to have sex within marriage.

 

[Stephen Kendall]

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Originally Posted by thesunisout
I don't think Christians have any problem with sex except when it is outside of marriage. The bible approves of sexual relations between a husband and wife and even says they should never withhold sex from one another unless it is agreed upon for a time of prayer and fasting. The marriage bed is undefiled, but everything outside of Gods design is sin and we can see the results of that in our corrupt western culture.
__________________

Correct, yet sex isn't wrong or evil, but it is your heart within or without a marriage that makes it evil. What is within the will of God is not necessarily in the heart of man, even when he is in the framework of His law! Solo sex is not evil, unless it becomes so, just as marriage sex isn't holy unless the hearts of those who do it in the marriage are right with God. Sex between unmarried persons is wrong, yet forgiven for those who marry.

I don't know why we have to talk about things like this. I do understand the sincerity of those seeking advice and help. We have sexual desires and want to be right with God. He gives us the desires and a way for them, in marriage. Our desires in marriage and their fulfillment are the same desires for sex before marriage, solo sexual expression. I believe that expression is fulfilled in marriage, or better said it is a desire for marriage, if indeed it is a moral expression only.

Enough for me. Come on. Unmarried moral solo sexual expression to release the male sexual build-up tension is the development that desires to be fulfilled through getting married. Most Christian men don't want to live alone and are embarrassed of their moral solo sexual experiences. I say moral, because sex can be had solo and moral in one's heart. If we have a will to be moral, we can or else we can not be guilty of sinning. This is true with solo sex as well.

Have a good day, I am out of this topic. I hope that I was not crude, offensive or uncaring. I hope that I may have helped someone here.

 

[mandyangel]

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Originally Posted by thesunisout
I don't think Christians have any problem with sex except when it is outside of marriage. The bible approves of sexual relations between a husband and wife and even says they should never withhold sex from one another unless it is agreed upon for a time of prayer and fasting. The marriage bed is undefiled, but everything outside of Gods design is sin and we can see the results of that in our corrupt western culture.
__________________

Correct, yet sex isn't wrong or evil, but it is your heart within or without a marriage that makes it evil. What is within the will of God is not necessarily in the heart of man, even when he is in the framework of His law! Solo sex is not evil, unless it becomes so, just as marriage sex isn't holy unless the hearts of those who do it in the marriage are right with God. Sex between unmarried persons is wrong, yet forgiven for those who marry.

I don't know why we have to talk about things like this. I do understand the sincerity of those seeking advice and help. We have sexual desires and want to be right with God. He gives us the desires and a way for them, in marriage. Our desires in marriage and their fulfillment are the same desires for sex before marriage, solo sexual expression. I believe that expression is fulfilled in marriage, or better said it is a desire for marriage, if indeed it is a moral expression only.

Enough for me. Come on. Unmarried moral solo sexual expression to release the male sexual build-up tension is the development that desires to be fulfilled through getting married. Most Christian men don't want to live alone and are embarrassed of their moral solo sexual experiences. I say moral, because sex can be had solo and moral in one's heart. If we have a will to be moral, we can or else we can not be guilty of sinning. This is true with solo sex as well.

Have a good day, I am out of this topic. I hope that I was not crude, offensive or uncaring. I hope that I may have helped someone here.

That's why expressing my sexuality through performance and dance without giving up virginity is so important to me.

 

[Spanky McFarland]

1.), How did Christianity get to the idea that sex is a bad thing? (rather than something to be responsible with)

I think there is sometimes confusion between being sexually repressed and sexually private. Sure there are some people out there who use their religion as a crutch to scare kids from not having sex. My parents were private about sex. We never had "the talk." However, there must have been plenty of teaching along the way as I felt I knew what their wishes were for me. Obviously. my hope for my children is that they wait until marriage because that provides the safest route both physically and mentally. It may not be realistic, but it can be taught. Because its not realistic, I can't fathom not teaching my kids about sex.

The fact that I won't be handing my son condoms and sending off to a hotel room with his GF isn't a repressive thing. I think repression and feeling bad about sex comes from factors outside of Christianity too, especially for Christians. Example: A Christian teen becomes sexually active and some non-Christian classmates discover it and consider her a hypocrite, talk badly about her, etc. The reaction she may get from people outside the community may be worse than those within. Sexual repression comes just as much outside the Christian community as it does within. Religion can play a factor though.

2.), Have you been repressed and what was your path to finding tranquility between your religious matters and sexual matters?

I would say no.

 

[retlaw]

From my view the protestant Christian church in America focused too much on the sin and not enough on the character of a Christian. Sex is not an urge that can be suppressed. Paul was clear that if you feel the need for sex get married and have at it. Don't try to fight it because you're going to lose. Unfortunately getting married today doesn't mean you're going to get sex (or much of it) so in the end I don't have an answer for you. Married people don't have the service mentality that Paul described. Our culture has taught us to serve our own needs first and that's just not working.

 

[Colleen1]

It seems as though alot of Christians equate sex or anything having to do with it with all what is typically against Christianity (pornography, pedophilia, homosexuality, etc.).

Let's face it. We deal with sexual feelings all the time. As much as we feel hungry, feel we need to poo, etc., sometimes we feel the need for pleasures of the sex variety (hopefully with one's spouse).

Oftentimes though I hear stories of people who are afraid of sex, and almost always from a family that crams religion and doesn't mention about sex at all. It can be very dangerous, as it can also result in the opposite and all it entails.

My mom failed to teach me about sex and almost never mentioned about it. Whenever I thought about sex, I tried avoiding it, though at the same time had a unfleeting curiosity about it. I'm still working on getting the whole gist of it not being an uncomfortable and negative topic.

I understand where you are coming from. You've made some good points.

The point of this thread is two things:

1.), How did Christianity get to the idea that sex is a bad thing? (rather than something to be responsible with)

I think it can be a combination of family, parental experience, our own experience & the way Christianity is presented. Some people can teach drawing from their own experience and that can affect ones perspective of how they view the Bible & the world around them. If they have been abused etc. or have learned from others who have had unhealthy / unaware views.

2.), Have you been repressed and what was your path to finding tranquility between your religious matters and sexual matters?

Well, the way I was taught was not appropriate / aware. I've seen both extremes in my family. When one comes from an unhealthy environment, it can send mixed messages and a skewed way of thinking. One can heal and become knowledgeable and wise regarding the Bible and living beyond a skewed childhood. God is good in helping us along when we seek Him and His will for our lives. Spending time alone studying the Bible, learning about God's character and asking God to search my heart...listening to what He has to say... was a good start for me in regards to all kinds of healing.

 

[plmarquette]

Relationships ... friendship is the prerequisite to dating, intimacy, marriage....
If you are not friends, if you don't enjoy things together (sports, fishing, movies, walks) will slow and fail...as 5 out of every 7 seem to....wrong thing , for wrong reason, at wrong time...

Sex is the "icing" on the cake, part of the glue that holds the marriage together. If all you have is sex, won't work...at some point deviate from normal desires, to "mix it up", get back your groove...spice things up... don't work, not about the "thrill and oey gooey stuff", about long term platform to build a future, vision, goals, kids, home, retirement, grandkids, community.... Marriage being the corner stone.

Sex when it comes first, produces kids, single moms, misery, flawed kids without mom or without dad .... 3.30-5.30 to hang out with other "latch key kids"... a problem awaiting to happen...

Not about dress, decorations, church, number of guests, about commitment to one another and commitment to God, the "3-fold" cord not easily broken...a promise in His house, before witnesses (to remind you when honey moon is over), that this is the one forsaking all others, forsaking a night out with girls or boys, seeking to build a new life, sharing , caring, and learning, one about the other

Sex is simple, any living thing can do it... but marriage is quite another story...consequences, responsibilities, destiny, kids and legacy....