Sex and parenthood

[notanordinarygirl]

Hey, y'all. New mom (6 month-old son, born premature, 4.75 months adjusted) with a question here!

How do you keep your sex life when babies, toddlers, and/or children are involved?

Are you able to keep it at all or is sex a rare treat for the first few months? Years...?

 

[FaithPrevails]

I waited the mandatory 6 weeks with each of mine to heal/recover from childbirth. Then, sex happened as time, energy, hormonal changes allowed it to happen. In other words, having a newborn is time consuming and tiring. Your body is also going through even more hormonal changes since you are no longer pregnant and may be breastfeeding.

The best thing is to talk with your husband about all of it and come to an agreement about what the frequency of sex will look like as you adjust to having the baby in your home.

Sex shouldn't be a rare treat in your marriage - ever - if you can help it. But, you have to be realistic about the demands that are on you/your body and make allowances for them.

Hope that helps.

 

[notanordinarygirl]

I waited the mandatory 6 weeks with each of mine to heal/recover from childbirth. Then, sex happened as time, energy, hormonal changes allowed it to happen. In other words, having a newborn is time consuming and tiring. Your body is also going through even more hormonal changes since you are no longer pregnant and may be breastfeeding.

The best thing is to talk with your husband about all of it and come to an agreement about what the frequency of sex will look like as you adjust to having the baby in your home.

Sex shouldn't be a rare treat in your marriage - ever - if you can help it. But, you have to be realistic about the demands that are on you/your body and make allowances for them.

Hope that helps.

I think that's a good plan.

I just don't know what the frequency of sex will be like. First kid and all. I guess we'll see what happens? Maybe DS will be a good boy and sleep nice long naps about a month from now.

 

[FaithPrevails]

You definitely have to get creative with an infant in the house. Sometimes, it's like Murphy's law, tho and they start wailing as soon as you start to have some fun.

 

[notanordinarygirl]

You definitely have to get creative with an infant in the house. Sometimes, it's like Murphy's law, tho and they start wailing as soon as you start to have some fun.

*sigh* My son was very high needs when he was younger, he refused the crib. He either slept with us or he slept with us, and couldn't stand 5 seconds without being carried around. Murphy was bad to us, DS wouldn't stop wailing! Literally less than 5 minutes in his crib and then he woke himself up crying.

Thank goodness, he's a little more independent now at 6 months. Some days, he even sleeps through the night in his scrib (other times, he wakes up to feed and then goes back to his crib for another 3-4 hours). So hopefully there will be more grown-up time soon!

 

[FaithPrevails]

Preemie babies usually are more demanding in the beginning. But, as they're adjusted age catches up to their actual age, it gets better. It sounds like he is coming along nicely - so a decent night's sleep and some adult fun is hopefully right around the corner.

It seems like the desire is there, just not the energy and opportunity. So, hopefully the issue will get straightened out sooner than later for you. It's hard the first time around - I remember. It sounds like you have a good handle on things, though.