Severly Depressed

[kpetty16]

I will pray for you as well as let you know what God did for me.
I felt very much the same as you. Life was going well. I wasn't as good a Christian as I could have been. I was severly depressed and searching for a way to end it.

A pastor prayed over me and anointed me with oil for healing. Nothing happened right away, but little by little I began to be able to pray and to read for more than 2 minutes at a time from my Bible as well as understand what I was reading. I am not struggling daily with depression anymore, although I know that if God chooses, He can allow it back into my life.

Just know that the people you love won't recover from your selfish deed. They love and need you, so find a way to hang on to God. He loves you and created you for a reason. Please don't give up.

God bless you,
Kim

 

[kpetty16]

I just read your update and this is wonderful news!
I will pray that things continue to go well for you. Stay in the Word and keep your fellowship lines with God open.

God bless,
Kim

 

[AllTalkNoAction]

I attended a bible study last night...we were studying John Chapter 4....it rung a bell as it mirrors what you have said... Jesus and the Samarian woman at the well...

In v14 Jesus says:-
whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life.

He is talking about what happens after you receive His Spirit.
His disciples did at Pentecost:-
they were all filled with the Holy Ghost, and began to speak with other tongues, as the Spirit gave them utterance (Acts 2:4)

Have you received the same Sawtooth?
For the promise is unto you, and to your children, and to all that are afar off, even as many as the Lord our God shall call (v39)

 

[Sawtooth]

Well..I had another depressive episode this week.
Severe depression is painfull...REAL physical pain!!!
Not being able to concentrate, compulsive crying, the moodswings, and feeling extremly low. It is still destroying my quality of life.

At work, I confided in a friendly coworker...he said he had the same issues...and FORCED me to go to see a doctor...an hour later I got an email "we are going at 11:10"...and that was it...we saw his doctor together...

So I am on meds, Lorazapam and Citalopram...
I felt confortable with the doctor, so I will stick with him.
I have to get a bunch of bloodwork done soon.

When I got back to work, my boss knew, and my bosses boss knew...we sat down and had a meeting...they basically forced me to cancel a trip and take some time off.
They seemed to be very understanding. I told the that
I am not insane and that I still expect to be held fully accountable for my actions, but that I am hurting very badly.

I am going to join a suport group at the local Cavlary Chapel this Friday. I need to talk to some people about this and try to manage this more effectively before it kills me.

I have a wife and three year old daughter depending on me.

 

[TomCS]

I am praying that it works out for you, and that you feel better.

 

[rachel22]

saw i pray that God will heal you emotionally, spiritually, physically. i pray that you will not give up. i pray that God will ease your pain.

 

[Criada]

Sorry this has come back, but it sounds as though you are doing the right things, and have a good support network in place.
I hope that you are feeling better soon

 

[miss-a]

I sent a pm with info that might help.

Praying, A

 

[plumsink]

Praying for you. Please don't give up.

 

[Sawtooth]

Thanks for all of the responses.
This has kind of embarrassed me at work.

I have gotten the bloodwork done and am committed to following up with this doctor.
He seems to care about what is going on.

I am also going to that support group at Calvary Chapel this evening.

I will see how that works out.

 

[Criada]

I'll be thinking of you ... and very much hoping that the support group works out well, and helps you to keep moving forward.

 

[Sawtooth]

Well, I went to the support group meeting and it wasn't like I expected it to be.
At first, I was like "I don't need to be around these people"...then I relaxed and remembered they are all God's people in need of help, just like me.

I'll go back next week...I actually liked it and I felt good.

The closer I come to the Lord in fellowship with other Christians, the better I feel.

That's where my heart needs to be...with the Lord.

 

[TomCS]

I'm glad that it went well for you, God bless you.

 

[jonathanboy]

Well..I had another depressive episode this week.
Severe depression is painfull...REAL physical pain!!!
Not being able to concentrate, compulsive crying, the moodswings, and feeling extremly low. It is still destroying my quality of life.

Do you have any idea why you are sad/depressed?

When I got back to work, my boss knew, and my bosses boss knew...we sat down and had a meeting...they basically forced me to cancel a trip and take some time off.

Perhaps in your time off you can really try to find out why you hurt. But that likely means hurting even more, like fasting for days with little distraction. Once you discover why you hurt you can begin to figure out how you should respond. It may be that you just need to communicate something, but you've lost what it is you need to communicate. Dig it up. Seek and you shall find.

I am going to join a suport group at the local Cavlary Chapel this Friday. I need to talk to some people about this and try to manage this more effectively before it kills me.

I have a wife and three year old daughter depending on me.

What you want to be is a veteran of these hard times - coming out on the other side of the fire stronger. A big part of overcoming the pain is enduring the pain - not trying to manage it and distract yourself from it, but just going right through it. It's very possible, and you can make it happen.

Just remember that you can make it through all of this. You are strong enough to make it through, and you'll be even stronger once you do. There are people all over the world enduring starvation, bone-chilling cold, isolation/loneliness, and so on...conditions that some couldn't imagine handling can be handled. If I can do it so can you, so can everybody.

Earlier in the thread you mentioned smoking. Do you still use this to relieve your pain, distract you from your hurt? This is just like any of the other patch-fixes people employ. Some people eat (for comfort), and become overweight. Others watch tv or play distracting games and remain or become weak...but these sorts of things are removing your ability to solve the problem in the here and now. They are prolonging you from coming through this difficulty. They don't last, they won't. You would be better served by 'taking the bull by the horns' and suffering through this. Fast and pray, isolate yourself, but, please, don't think killing yourself will help you. That is not a sustainable solution my friend. God wants you to grow. Grow man, grow. Don't you think that would be a good idea?

I hope I can be of service to you. Ask and you shall recieve.

 

[jonathanboy]

Well, I went to the support group meeting and it wasn't like I expected it to be.
At first, I was like "I don't need to be around these people"...then I relaxed and remembered they are all God's people in need of help, just like me.

I'll go back next week...I actually liked it and I felt good.

The closer I come to the Lord in fellowship with other Christians, the better I feel.

That's where my heart needs to be...with the Lord.

I agree. When I was feeling depressed I felt the complete opposite, pure joy, when I went and saw Christians fellowshipping together. That should give you hope - that you can still feel good without drugs/sin/etc. Trying and hoping to help others can also be a good source of relief/joy. I hope things like that will help you get through your pain.

 

[miss-a]

Good morning,

I just wanted to quickly check in on something. I mean no disrespect whatsoever, jonathanboy, and welcome to the forum! I just wanted to put out there that the cool thing (well one of the millions of cool things) about God is that we don't have to "dig for it." Anything that He wants us dealing with and healing from is up to Him. We don't have to carry that responsibility. The unsaved might have to. But we kids of the Most High God just need to seek, seek, seek the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all else will be added to us. He will let us know what past events He wants to deal with. And there certainly are some. But He is so gracious, and so about the plans He has for us, He won't keep us in the past for long stretches, really only long enough for us to acknowledge it and what it did to us, that we'll never be able to undo it ourselve, and then to invite Him into it for healing. Then it's time to move on and into His plan, forgetting, "the things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead," pressing on "toward the goal of the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus" (Phil 4:13 & 14).

We need to seek God and not our pasts, though seeking Him may involve a quick visit to the past in order to give it to Him. And that's likely what you meant. I just felt a deep need to clarify, because I've learned the hard way, and hope others won't have to, that the painful past is, in effect, a lie birthed in hell. Yes, it happened. But it did not reflect God's truth nor His promises. Therefore it hovers in the realm of lies and the "father of lies" Jesus warns us about loves to get us stuck in the past rather than focused on the holy nail-scarred hand that coaxes us into a blessed life where all things are becoming new. Even our old pasts are new in Christ. Oh, oh, oh! here's a great Bible study on that very thing:

James and Betty Robison on LIFE Today
James and Betty Robison on LIFE Today
James and Betty Robison on LIFE Today
James and Betty Robison on LIFE Today

One study, four parts. Just click the links in the order they are posted. They are short but VERY sweet, like honey from the rock! I hope you will enjoy them. And just to clear up confusion, this is not a woman-only study. Beth Moore teaches under James Robison's covering, so it's for all God's kids!


Blessings, A

 

[hope_is_last_to_die]

Agree that we need to try and forget about the past and press on but some wounds and hurts of the past are so deep and are so hard to put behind us. Sometimes I feel like I have forgotten something from the past and moved on and then something triggers the memory/experience of the past and its back again.

 

[nessa9522]

Please go get help. Your wife and children need you.... God loves you soo much and it is not his will for you to take your life.... Talk to your pastor or someone about this.

 

[miss-a]

I think that happens to all of us, at least for a while. The Bible says that He drives the enemy out "little by little." So the thoughts may resurface, but the great thing is we can continually give them to Jesus.

 

[Sawtooth]

I agree. When I was feeling depressed I felt the complete opposite, pure joy, when I went and saw Christians fellowshipping together. That should give you hope - that you can still feel good without drugs/sin/etc. Trying and hoping to help others can also be a good source of relief/joy. I hope things like that will help you get through your pain.

It's funny how God works.
And it's reassurance, to me at least, that I really am saved.

I was supposed to be working on Friday night on yet another project...but the Lord grabbed me and put me a in a Church service specifically targeted at individuals with mental illnesses.

He literally lined everything up for me...had another guy graciously take my place on the project...made my co-workers supportive...

And then He showed me his power and glory...what he is doing in people's lives. People who are hurting much more than me.

If this is not God working in my life, I don't know what is.