Self Harm

[Klavier]

I have been self-harming for about 4 years, and I was recently sent to a therapist who was more interested in claiming I had an eating disorder (which I definetly do not) than focusing on any of the problems I actually have.
This being in the UK, there's not much other support I can find.

I'm desperate to stop, but every while I go into a major relapse and can't stop. I have ugly scars which won't fade on my arms, legs, stomach and thighs and... I just don't know what to do. I feel like giving up.

 

[Onlythingavailable]

Don't give up! With God's help you can beat this!

What is it that is really troubling you? The things the therapist didn't want to focus on?

Just because the therapist didn't listen to you this time, don't be afraid to go again. Just show to him/her that you don't have an eating disorder, and then try to get them to focus on what is troubling you. Just remember that in order for him/her to be cooperative, you also need to be. Don't dismiss the therapist just because he/she doesn't agree with you. Instead show them why you think they are wrong.

If you feel you are getting no where with this therapist, ask your parents/school to be allowed to see another one. I'm sure there is more than one therapist where you live, even in the UK! It might take some work, but you should be able to get to see another one.

I'll pray for you. May God help you overcome this.

 

[Anti Existance]

Imagine you are trapped in a prison, what helps more? Cutting or a key to get out? Invest your energy in finding the key. Cutting is just a way of going around your problems, so what your doing in terms of self-injury has no value. How many problems have been solved as a result of it?

 

[HoneyComb Son]

Hey there..dont give up!..God will surely help you and deliver you! Sasu..take courage and have hope

Father I pray for Sasu..Father please lift them up..fill them with hope..of your promises..your promise of never failing them...promises of deliverance..Father i ask for you to deliver this daugther..Father set them free of this..i pray healing for them Father..in Jesus name amen

 

[Mr.Cheese]

.

 

[madison1101]

Don't give up on yourself. God doesn't give up on us. I have been a cutter, and eating disordered, so I understand the complexities of being in recovery. Relapse happens to the best people. It doesn't mean you are a failure, just that you failed once. A failure is someone who gives up, and God's kids shouldn't give up because we have someone special within us.

Scripture says "Greater is He that is in us than he that is in the world." You have Holy Spirit power in you, to give you the strength and courage to face whatever it is that is driving your behavior at this time.

Learn to self-soothe and find things you can do instead of cutting when you are upset. I like to light candles and listen to soothing music. I also journal and exercise when I am upset.

Be good to yourself. PM me if you need to talk.

Hugs,
Trish

 

[artjack]

dont give up living,give up compeating, perhalps get a tattoo you will like to look at and see to take the focus of your scars, do kind things for others to see if you will change. get rid of any jellousy you may have and go easy on yourself, you dont have to be the best, just conceed, there are to many people trying, in my church there are hermits, they have and own very little and love their church and god and they are among the happiest people in the world or so they make it seem,

 

[trinitydigital]

You reap what you sow. Find someone who needs help, open your heart to them and you will find true fulfillment. Jesus will cover you with his love. He will let you know how important you are to him. If not us then who?

 

[SoapySam]

You're not in the UK.
You're in the Peoples' Republic of Scotland -the Best Small Country in the World.
Jack McConnell says so and Jack's the lad.

Questions for you, if I may. Forgive me if I seem pushy. There's a reason I'll explain at the end.
You say you were SENT to this therapist. Doyou mean you didn't go voluntarily? Would you describe your attitude about seeing this person as positive or negative?

You are pretty vehement about denying any eating disorder.
Can you be OBJECTIVELY sure about this? Is it remotely possible you could be in denial? If I asked for a list of what you ate this week could you give it and do you reckon it would be "normal". (Which , for Scotland means at least five pies and a gallon of Irn-Bru).
Don't feel you need to actually answer me. Not at all. I'm just throwing out questions it may be worth asking yourself if you have not already done so.
Specifically I'm wondering if something you eat or drink may contribute to the self harming thing- alcohol being an obvious possibility.

If I seem to be harping on a bit it's because I (among many others) was totally taken in a few years ago by a friend's daughter who was doing the cutting thing and was eating normally, then going to the school toilet and throwing up.

She denied this consistently until one of her friends filmed her with a mobile phone and emailed her the photos. Talk about a wake-up call.
I still have no idea if she was consciously lying or genuinely believed her own version of reality. According to her folks, she has bounced back tremendously since then.

I'm not a therapist and don't play one on TV, but the story is true and shocked me out of my complacency on the issue. This is a very bright lassie currently studying Physics at Uni.
Whether it's in any way relevant to your situation, I can't possibly know, but I'd feel dishonest if I didn't ask.

I agree with folks above. Talk to people. Fill your life with positive activity. Write, exercise, help others, learn canoeing or riding- Whatever gets you going and gets you away from this.





I don't know whether the answer to this is important, but I wonder why her conclusion was so wrong if you did (or someone else) had not reported an eating problem. If someone told me they were self harming, I don't think I'd ask when they ate last. It seems a bit wierd.

Is there a single cause of the self harming? Do you know what the cause(s) is /are or are you baffled?

This therapist was NHS? They are always short of consellor/ therapist types. Have you considered going private- talk to a psychiatrist? I have no clue what it costs, but if it's your health against a bankloan it might be the best investment you ever made.

 

[heymikey80]

I have been self-harming for about 4 years, and I was recently sent to a therapist who was more interested in claiming I had an eating disorder (which I definetly do not) than focusing on any of the problems I actually have.
This being in the UK, there's not much other support I can find.

I'm desperate to stop, but every while I go into a major relapse and can't stop. I have ugly scars which won't fade on my arms, legs, stomach and thighs and... I just don't know what to do. I feel like giving up.

OK, I'm just a volunteer layman at this, with just my own experiences in life. Like Anti-Existence has said, maybe you feel trapped by your current situation in ways you can't change at all. Or maybe you feel trapped by things you yourself are doing, but you don't feel like you can change them? I'm not sure. I don't know if it'd even help from where I stand, but I feel deeply for your situation.

My greatest feelings of wanting to get out of my own skin come from my parents' divorce. I remember my parents divorcing like it was yesterday. That was a black time I don't enjoy visiting even now, yet I do for reality's sake. There, people made decisions that slammed into me like a freight train, and I could do nothing to recover.

But through this happening in my life I discovered an intense compassion from others, first in my school and more deeply in my church brothers and with my youth pastor, to help me through this mind-numbing blackness.

Through that I also discovered some of my own actions were entrapping me. I was doing things that "worked" when I was a kid to get me out of responsibility and action -- but that left me high and dry when it came to having a purpose and a hope for life. I'm still grappling with that now. But the more I change, the more vital I feel about my life. Like Kennedy said, we could need to do these things "not because it is easy, but because it is hard." They define us. They call us out as being distinctly different people. Sometimes it's just heeding advice nobody else heeds. Other times it's challenging something that gives us a moral queasiness -- or in my case challenging my psychological distance from others.

 

[God713]

I can only see one way out of your problem.
Now this may seem a little irrational to start with, but have a good think about it before you make your decision.

You should join me in my quest towards heaven, where Allah will look after us.
Allah will provide us with our place in heaven and you will recieve many virgins who will cater to your every sexual requirement.

Please P.M me so i cann tell you more of the truth.

 

[cinnabunch]

I think that it would be a good idea to try and get a new therapist. Also, have you looked into the things that trigger you to cut? Has anyone given you any ideas of what to do in place of self injury? Like holding an icecube tightly in your hand when the desire comes on. Snapping a rubberband that is on your wrist. Things like that?

Don't get discourged sweety. There are ppl who understand what you are going through, and there are therapists who really can help.

blessings
cindy