Seeking Advice

[CGL]

I think if I ever saw the family that abused me again, I would hurt them really badly.
Any scripture I can read that will help me with these feelings of intense, violent vengence?

 

[Jenafer]

I try not to dwell on the bad times too much.. the idea is to make yourself as comfortable as your circumstances allow.. if your live is going well then you will be less inclined to dwell so much on vengence.



These bad people are not worth doing jail over.. make a good life for yourself.. you deserve it!

Jenafer

 

[goldenviolet]

recovering from abuse is sometimes a process. sometimes triggered feelings or memories can make us feel so intense. some people deal with flashbacks and struggles getting past the same feelings that occured at the time of abuse. i think some counseling or group support benifets all survivors. sometimes it takes us to talk it out for us to process and heal past what our struggles are. i'm sorry you are struggling with this. it's difficult for us when our abusers get away without consequences, or remorse. continue to do things, like reaching out here, and other healling, supportive things. just remind yourself that it is a process, and don't let yourself get discouraged, or beat yourself up, for not being 'the picture perfect christain'. we all learn and unlearn, and relearn in steps (renewing of our minds).

you have a loving God, and exhorting church family to help you through the processes.

 

[BelindaP]

I can think of two verses that I have held tightly to over the years. The first one is:

Rom 12:19 Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but [rather] give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance [is] mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.

What this says to me is that justice is in God's hands. If you think of anything you could do to them, it will pale in comparison to God's justice. I know it is hard to be patient and to trust in God, but His way is always the best way.

The second passage I keep in mind is Isaiah 53, which is a description of Jesus' death. Jesus was essentially tortured to death. That means that he knows exactly how you feel. Just like you, he was tempted to repay what they did in kind, and yet he did not. Instead, he asked his Father to forgive them.

I know it will be incredibly painful for you to do this, but following Jesus' example is what we are called to do as Christians. When you feel yourself becoming overwhelmed with hatred for that family, try to pray for them instead.

It doesn't have to be anything terribly 'Christian' at first. In fact, some of my first prayers were things like "Lord, I pray that you don't wipe them off the face of the earth like I want you to." You will find that by even praying something like that, your hate and anger will lessen just a bit. My experience is that it is impossible to hate when you are in communication with God.

I pray God will bless you with His peace. I've been where you are now, and I assure you there is a way out.

 

[Johnnz]

You may need to face up to the anger, as some of it is fully justified. Have you spoken to anyone in depth about your abuse?

John
NZ