Scrupulosity and Feeling like I'm Always in Mortal Sin

[Convert2011]

Before I begin, I know that the thing I should do in such a situation is go to my confessor. For me this is impossible, since I don't have one. The priest at my parish is unorthodox and when it comes to sin I want a priest that I know accepts all that the Church teaches. The issue is to important to receive false information. I am trying to find a priest that I can go to for scrupulosity, but that could take some time. In addition, I don't personally know any orthodox Catholics. As a result, I have no choice, but to ask on a forum, even though this is not my preferred method. I honestly have no one to go to for spiritual guidance.

So now for my problem: I have a struggle discerning if a sin is detraction. Well this leads me to always think I'm in mortal sin. To day for example, I told my parents that when I walked into the school bathroom I saw a group of people doing drugs. I guess this may not be the worst thing to tell them and it didn't harm anyone's reputation, but still I'm fearful about my guilt. To make matters worse I felt that it may be a sin to tell my dad and yet I told him any way. I know that to do something that you think is a mortal sin, makes it a mortal sin, even if it would normally be venial. Would this apply in such a situation as I described?


Thanks.

 

[Jimmy P]

Why would you feel guilty about telling your parents you saw some guys doing drugs? It wasn't your fault...that shouldn't bother you...and where would the sin be in that?

Welcome to CF...I know you said this isn't your preferred method, but do stick around...alot of great, wise people here...

 

[WisdomTree]

What makes your priest so unorthodox?

 

[Convert2011]

Why would you feel guilty about telling your parents you saw some guys doing drugs? It wasn't your fault...that shouldn't bother you...and where would the sin be in that?

Welcome to CF...I know you said this isn't your preferred method, but do stick around...alot of great, wise people here...

I guess I'm worried about committing the sin of detraction. The main problem would be that I thought it could have been a mortal sin prior to saying anything.

Thanks I do intend on sticking around

What makes your priest so unorthodox?

Most of the unorthodoxy comes from practices during Mass (omitting the word "men" from the creed, being okay with no kneeling, he said that while he doesn't like it, liturgical dance was appropriate in some instances, making sarcastic remarks about it being unusual for him to be unorthodox, supporting the view that the Mass could be altered for local customs, he's also okay with adding words to the Gloria and Great Amen)

Also, he's given an incredibly vague talk on the issue of women's ordination. At points he seemed in support of it at other not so much. It was almost as if he wanted to please all sides within the parish. Also, he's said that all of your sins are forgiven prior to going to confession. In addition, when asked about mortal sin, he bypassed talking about mortal sin. He did use the criteria, but instead of applying it to mortal sin said that all three (grave matter, full knowledge, and consent of the will) had to be met in order for something to be sinful. This was done without making a distinction between mortal and venial sin.

 

[Memento Mori]

No, there was no sin here. For one, I am assuming your parents don't know the kids in question. The object of detraction is to harm someone's reputation in another person's eyes. This isn't possible if the individuals have no reputation with your parents. Secondly, even if your parents do know the people in question, they have a rightful claim to this information anyway as your parents, and so even if you were only sharing it as amusing dinner conversation and not because you were seriously concerned, you did a just thing. Thirdly, even if there were a sin here, it would without a doubt be venial because there is no grave matter here.

Are you planning on sticking around OBOB? Though this place has its fair share of unorthodoxy, you might find the community a helpful resource.

Edit: I see you already answered my last question.

 

[Jimmy P]

Jared has a way of making a person feel better

How much wiser you're gonna be by time you reach my age Jared...

 

[Memento Mori]

Thanks Jimmy. You're kinder than I am wise. I'm a real idiot most of the time.

 

[Convert2011]

No, there was no sin here. For one, I am assuming your parents don't know the kids in question. The object of detraction is to harm someone's reputation in another person's eyes. This isn't possible if the individuals have no reputation with your parents. Secondly, even if your parents do know the people in question, they have a rightful claim to this information anyway as your parents, and so even if you were only sharing it as amusing dinner conversation and not because you were seriously concerned, you did a just thing. Thirdly, even if there were a sin here, it would without a doubt be venial because there is no grave matter here.

Are you planning on sticking around OBOB? Though this place has its fair share of unorthodoxy, you might find the community a helpful resource.

Edit: I see you already answered my last question.

Thanks

 

[Colin]

This site may be of help to any suffering from scrupulosity .

The Scrupulous Catholic Podcast | The Scrupulous Catholic.

 

[Rhamiel]

well i hope you find a good spiritual advisor
but any priest can hear confessions
it is the power of God that forgives sins
not the wisdom, or even the faith, of the priest you confess too

 

[Needing_Grace]

I guess I'm worried about committing the sin of detraction. The main problem would be that I thought it could have been a mortal sin prior to saying anything.

Thanks I do intend on sticking around



Most of the unorthodoxy comes from practices during Mass (omitting the word "men" from the creed, being okay with no kneeling, he said that while he doesn't like it, liturgical dance was appropriate in some instances, making sarcastic remarks about it being unusual for him to be unorthodox, supporting the view that the Mass could be altered for local customs, he's also okay with adding words to the Gloria and Great Amen)

That's not a matter of orthodoxy (right doctrine), it's a matter of orthopraxis (right practice). They're important distinctions, to be sure. One can hold to doctrines that aren't orthodox but follow correct practice (i.e., Lutherans celebrating the Lord's Supper use a liturgy that mirrors ours very, very closely, including the matter (unleavened wheat bread and wine), form ("take eat, this is My Body, this cup is the New Testament in My Blood") and intent (to celebrate the sacrament) -- even thought they don't have the power to actually do so).

This isn't to say that what he's doing is cool or anything, just defining terms. Where I sometimes go, the priest always puts the word "the" between the words "Jesus" and "Christ."

Also, he's given an incredibly vague talk on the issue of women's ordination. At points he seemed in support of it at other not so much. It was almost as if he wanted to please all sides within the parish. Also, he's said that all of your sins are forgiven prior to going to confession. In addition, when asked about mortal sin, he bypassed talking about mortal sin. He did use the criteria, but instead of applying it to mortal sin said that all three (grave matter, full knowledge, and consent of the will) had to be met in order for something to be sinful. This was done without making a distinction between mortal and venial sin.

The mortal/venial sin distinction is important, but in the context of confession, only sins that meet mortal criteria (the three conditions) are required to be confessed.

 

[Convert2011]

Thanks for the replies.

I still go to this priest for confession, but when it comes to my problems discerning if something is mortal or venial, I don't trust him. From what I've heard I doubt he'd think it should matter. So while I go to him for confession, I'm not comfortable going to him for spiritual guidance.

 

[WisdomTree]

Thanks for the replies.

I still go to this priest for confession, but when it comes to my problems discerning if something is mortal or venial, I don't trust him. From what I've heard I doubt he'd think it should matter. So while I go to him for confession, I'm not comfortable going to him for spiritual guidance.

Though I could not understand how you feel due to lack of trust (since I had not gone through this experience before), one thing to remember is that when going for confession, you are not confessing your sins to the priest, but to God himself. The priest is just there to guide you and act in persona of Christ where he will grant you absolution on behalf of our Lord. If you do not think your priest is capable then turn to your fellow brothers and sisters of Faith, and see if they are of any help.

Another thing to remember, we are always here to help you around even though we are limited in that we have yet to meet in real life.