Scruples or rationalization...I'm so confused

[pax]

Hey everyone, I just have a question about evaluating one's own moral culpability for sins committed. I sin a lot...it's not that I really want to sin...I hate it. Every time I seem to have won a battle with one vice, another surfaces and I am almost always worried that I'm in a state of mortal sin. I feel like I'm being scrupulous sometimes and to counterract the scruples I feel like I'm rationalizing. For example, nearly every sin against the sixth commandment is grave matter. I struggle with lustful thoughts a lot (count as grave matter "whoever looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart). Obviously temptation is not sin so I have been under the impression that as long as the thoughts aren't there wilfully there is no actual sin. The problem is I am not always sure where the line is. For example, tonight I had to watch a movie for a class I'm taking and there were quite a few sexual references and temptations. I didn't feel as though I was giving consent (I tried to fight of the thoughts), but I still felt wrong for watching it in the first place and not leaving the room. The other night I watched a movie with some people that I knew would have sexual references in it (although I didn't think they'd be as bad as they turned out to be) and I did leave at a convenient time, but I should have left earlier. It's really frustrating. Every Sunday I am wondering if I'm in a state of grace. I go to confession regularly, but it's still a battle. I don't want to receive Our Lord sacreligiously, but I also don't want to miss out on such a great grace. I'm sorry this is so long, but I was wondering if someone could give me any advice. I feel as though my intentions are usually pure, and I do not want to offend God...but I know I do.

Immaculate Mary, pray for us!

 

[Benedicta00]

Know how you feel, that is why we have mass and confession. You are contrite and mass and confession cleanses you. You have to trust that you are forgiven and not be scandalized by the fact you are a sinner, sinning is what you do.

 

[RhetorTheo]

I think it is best to have confession right before Mass, so that this problem does not come up.

 

[pax]

So if I'm unsure as to whether or not I'm in a state of grace, what should I do? Abstain from communion and be on the safe side?

 

[Benedicta00]

So if I'm unsure as to whether or not I'm in a state of grace, what should I do? Abstain from communion and be on the safe side?

part of mortal sin is knowledge.

 

[Maggie893]

So if I'm unsure as to whether or not I'm in a state of grace, what should I do? Abstain from communion and be on the safe side?

Confess to the priest your case of scrupulosity. If he deduces that it's not and you really are sinning he'll tell you. If he deduces that it's scruples he'll absolve you...then you can relinquish all fear. Love God....that will cover a multitude of sins.

 

[pax]

part of mortal sin is knowledge.

I realize that which almsot makes me think I might be overreacting since a lot of times I may not realize a situation is grave matter until after it has happened. Mortal sin can't happen by accident, but I'm always worried that I might be rationalizing my behavior.

 

[QuantaCura]

So if I'm unsure as to whether or not I'm in a state of grace, what should I do? Abstain from communion and be on the safe side?

St. Faustina, of Divine Mercy fame, said we should receive Communion if we have any doubt whether or not we are in a state of grace.

Personally, I know when I'm in a state of mortal sin. To commit a mortal sin, think, "I know this is a grave offense against God, but I'll do it anyway." No one commits mortal sin accidentally.

 

[Benedicta00]

I realize that which almsot makes me think I might be overreacting since a lot of times I may not realize a situation is grave matter until after it has happened. Mortal sin can't happen by accident, but I'm always worried that I might be rationalizing my behavior.

I also go through the same turmoil before mass. It's freeing to realize that you sin and are a sinner, if you weren't you would have no need of even going to mass, Jesus would not have had to die. He came for the sinners not the righteous. They don’t need a doctor, you do and so do I. This is why he comes to us in communion and why he did not give this gift to the angles, they don’t need it we do, this is why we say “I am unworthy to receive you but say the word…” You go to mass to be forgiven, because you are weak not because you are perfect. Mortal sin is a different story altogether. If you really committed serious mortal sin, not just struggled with a grave matter, then I think you would know it for sure.

 

[AMDG]

Your confessor should be able to help you should you have reason to believe you are scrupulous. Should you have a case of being scrupulous (very painful indeed and yet I have heard that some of the saints have suffered from it at one time), the organization mentioned here http://mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupanon.htm can be a big help.

 

[graysparrow]

St. Faustina, of Divine Mercy fame, said we should receive Communion if we have any doubt whether or not we are in a state of grace.

Personally, I know when I'm in a state of mortal sin. To commit a mortal sin, think, "I know this is a grave offense against God, but I'll do it anyway." No one commits mortal sin accidentally.

 

[pax]

Thank you guys for all the responses. They helped a lot. I finally decided that even though I didn't feel at peace when I was preparing for Mass that didn't necessarily mean I wasn't in a state of grace. I'll ask my confessor about this next time and see if he has any advice.

Thanks again and God bless!