Scared to come out as Catholic to my sister

[HoneyBee]

Hello Catholic family. I'm posting here again with a prayer request regarding my sister. So... Now that I'm wanting to explore being Catholic again, I feel a sudden desire to start speaking more clean rather than using crass language. My sister is one who curses like a sailor, especially when talking with me. It's in a playful manner, but I still feel like a bad person whenever I speak with such vulgarity these days, and I only ever seem to speak that way when I'm around her.

I could just outright tell my sister about my desire to speak clean again, but then she'll ask why... And I'd have to explain that I want to explore Catholicism again. The last time I expressed this desire, she accused me of going to "the dark side" and aligning myself with toxic ideologies. This mostly concerns her because she's also someone who considers herself to be LGBT, specifically bisexual and transgender. Every time I try to return to Christ, she threatens me by saying that if I "disrespect" her or her gender identity, we're "going to have a problem." We both live together at this point and I don't want to cause any rifts, especially considering that I love her like a best friend. I don't want to lose that... But then again, a best friend sibling wouldn't talk to their own flesh and blood like that, would they? And if I have to walk on eggshells every time I speak with her, then is this truly a friendship I should be striving to keep?

I'm going to try and see if I can speak with a deacon at my local church about some of these concerns, because it makes things difficult when trying to live out my faith. I'm scared, honestly... But then, when I look at the apostles and see how brave they were when facing those who were against God, I'm hardly holding a candle to their trials. I feel like I should stop being a coward and just come clean about my beliefs already. From there, I wouldn't be responsible for my sister's reaction. That would all be on herself... Still, it'll take a leap of great faith in order to proclaim my belief in God through his One Holy Church, because without her, I feel like I might not make it through life. We've both been through so much trauma together at the hands of our mother, so at the end of the day, I feel like she's all I've got left, despite both of my parents and families still being alive and well... It's just difficult with my families in particular due to in-fighting and things of that nature.

Please pray that I find the courage to speak the Truth and also that my family can be healed in some way from its various wounds and hurts.

 

[RileyG]

God bless you

 

[fide]

Hello Catholic family. I'm posting here again with a prayer request regarding my sister. So... Now that I'm wanting to explore being Catholic again, I feel a sudden desire to start speaking more clean rather than using crass language. My sister is one who curses like a sailor, especially when talking with me. It's in a playful manner, but I still feel like a bad person whenever I speak with such vulgarity these days, and I only ever seem to speak that way when I'm around her.

I could just outright tell my sister about my desire to speak clean again, but then she'll ask why... And I'd have to explain that I want to explore Catholicism again. The last time I expressed this desire, she accused me of going to "the dark side" and aligning myself with toxic ideologies. This mostly concerns her because she's also someone who considers herself to be LGBT, specifically bisexual and transgender. Every time I try to return to Christ, she threatens me by saying that if I "disrespect" her or her gender identity, we're "going to have a problem." We both live together at this point and I don't want to cause any rifts, especially considering that I love her like a best friend. I don't want to lose that... But then again, a best friend sibling wouldn't talk to their own flesh and blood like that, would they? And if I have to walk on eggshells every time I speak with her, then is this truly a friendship I should be striving to keep?

I'm going to try and see if I can speak with a deacon at my local church about some of these concerns, because it makes things difficult when trying to live out my faith. I'm scared, honestly... But then, when I look at the apostles and see how brave they were when facing those who were against God, I'm hardly holding a candle to their trials. I feel like I should stop being a coward and just come clean about my beliefs already. From there, I wouldn't be responsible for my sister's reaction. That would all be on herself... Still, it'll take a leap of great faith in order to proclaim my belief in God through his One Holy Church, because without her, I feel like I might not make it through life. We've both been through so much trauma together at the hands of our mother, so at the end of the day, I feel like she's all I've got left, despite both of my parents and families still being alive and well... It's just difficult with my families in particular due to in-fighting and things of that nature.

Please pray that I find the courage to speak the Truth and also that my family can be healed in some way from its various wounds and hurts.

The search for Truth - the desire for Truth - the hunger for Truth - is a blessing and a grace, a gift in itself!, from God. It will be attacked, that you can count on, because there are many people who want approval from friends, and/or family... from some human group of persons they can see and hear and belong among. And, there are people who seek Truth no matter the cost, because Truth is a precious thing. Truth is really necessary, even though some will cast it aside to keep their "group" happy with them.

The Bible points out how Jesus was hated - yes, hated - because He would not deny the Truth to "get along with others." Many loved the approval of people, rather than the approval of God!

John 14:6 Jesus said to him, "I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father, but by me.
John 14:7 If you had known me, you would have known my Father also;

John 12:42 Nevertheless many even of the authorities believed in him, but for fear of the Pharisees they did not confess it, lest they should be put out of the synagogue:
John 12:43 for they loved the praise of men more than the praise of God.

 

[chevyontheriver]

Hello Catholic family. I'm posting here again with a prayer request regarding my sister. So... Now that I'm wanting to explore being Catholic again, I feel a sudden desire to start speaking more clean rather than using crass language. My sister is one who curses like a sailor, especially when talking with me. It's in a playful manner, but I still feel like a bad person whenever I speak with such vulgarity these days, and I only ever seem to speak that way when I'm around her.

I could just outright tell my sister about my desire to speak clean again, but then she'll ask why... And I'd have to explain that I want to explore Catholicism again. The last time I expressed this desire, she accused me of going to "the dark side" and aligning myself with toxic ideologies. This mostly concerns her because she's also someone who considers herself to be LGBT, specifically bisexual and transgender. Every time I try to return to Christ, she threatens me by saying that if I "disrespect" her or her gender identity, we're "going to have a problem." We both live together at this point and I don't want to cause any rifts, especially considering that I love her like a best friend. I don't want to lose that... But then again, a best friend sibling wouldn't talk to their own flesh and blood like that, would they? And if I have to walk on eggshells every time I speak with her, then is this truly a friendship I should be striving to keep?

I'm going to try and see if I can speak with a deacon at my local church about some of these concerns, because it makes things difficult when trying to live out my faith. I'm scared, honestly... But then, when I look at the apostles and see how brave they were when facing those who were against God, I'm hardly holding a candle to their trials. I feel like I should stop being a coward and just come clean about my beliefs already. From there, I wouldn't be responsible for my sister's reaction. That would all be on herself... Still, it'll take a leap of great faith in order to proclaim my belief in God through his One Holy Church, because without her, I feel like I might not make it through life. We've both been through so much trauma together at the hands of our mother, so at the end of the day, I feel like she's all I've got left, despite both of my parents and families still being alive and well... It's just difficult with my families in particular due to in-fighting and things of that nature.

Please pray that I find the courage to speak the Truth and also that my family can be healed in some way from its various wounds and hurts.

I don't have it all figured out for you. Of course not. But how about this.

"I'm a Christian now and we are going to have a problem if you disrespect me or my identity in any way because of that. Swearing in front of me will disrespect me. Accusing me of anything will disrespect me. Even thinking the thought that I am involved in a toxic ideology will disrespect me. I'm your sister and I have your back but you do not disrespect me. Period. End of story."

A pre-emptive strike putting her on eggshells instead of her putting you on eggshells? Just a thought. Actually, treat it as a thought experiment. How would she react? She thinks you have to bend into a pretzel for her? What is she willing to do for you? I pray for courage for you.

 

[Emerald518]

Not Catholic, but hope I can provide some help here.

One of the unfortunate things of the Gospel is that, yes, we will be hated and even persecuted for following Jesus because the world hates Him and we will lose fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters, etc....but Jesus also says that anyone who loves father or mother or brother or sister more than Him is not worthy of Him, and there is not one person who loses father, mother, brother or sister on earth who will not find many more in the Kingdom of God (Matt. 10:37-39, Mark 10:29-31).

As far as losing the relationship with your sister, expect that it may happen, but don't forget that in Matthew 6, the "Sermon on the Mount", Jesus also instructs us to turn the other cheek and do good to those who hate us, because as it also says in Romans (Rom. 2:4), God's kindness leads toward repentance and in James it also says that the prayer of one who is righteous avails much (James 5:16-17) So, I would urge you to follow the Lord, because Jesus also says to not fear those who can kill us physically and nothing beyond that, but rather, fear the One who can kill us physically AND sentence us to eternal death (Matt. 10:28)...you are not necessarily abandoning or betraying your sister, but rather allowing God to work in your life so that He might work in hers, too....it's going to be hard, but remember too that God not only wants ALL people to be saved, but He is also a God of Miracles, too.

 

[boughtwithaprice]

Your sister is angry because she feels that Catholicism would attack who she believes herself to be. LGBT is not who she is, rather how she chooses to pursue pleasure. Sex for pleasure only is lust, and lust is a desire that will never be satisfied, and she will never find peace
If lesbianism brought her peace, then why would she have to fight with you because you’re Catholic? That is not peaceful.

The seven deadly sins are sins because they consume and destroy us. Pride is sinful because it hurts those around us, as we are not as good as we think and that’s not helpful. It also hurts when we fall from pride and get mocked. We need to be humble to do the most good.

Lust is never ending as it has no purposeful end. A person just wants more and more and gets angry when their partner does not want it as much as they do, and it leads to loneliness and mistrust. Chastity and childbearing in a family brings satisfaction

Envy is all consuming and give us nothing. Kindness is more satisfying

Wrath gives a temporary release then regret. Much more is accomplished through patience

Greed also cannot be satisfied as there is always someone that has more, and riches do not make one good. The more you make, the more they take. Generosity and almsgiving lead to more hapiness

Gluttony only makes you fat and fat makes you sick. Temperance is more healthy

Sloth paralyzes one with fear of failure and lack of motivation. It is through fortitude and courage that much is accomplished

Tell your sister that you have found peace in the Catholic Church, because you know God loves you. There is no need to constantly feel validated because someone else loves me. I have the peace of the Lord Jesus and His grace flows through the sacraments. Though the whole world hate me still will I serve Him. Ask your sister if she would still feel loved if her lover did not love her?

In the Catholic Church there is neither gay nor straight only chaste and unchaste. A heterosexual using contraception is no different than a homosexual. Both are unchaste and in mortal sin, not because God is mean and wants to ruin their fun, but their actions will leave them empty and alone and blaming God. Sounds like hell doesn’t it?

 

[Chrystal-J]

My sister is a hardcore atheist (so was my mom), at some point I just started stating my faith and let the fur fly. I wore a "This gal loves Jesus" t-shirt over to my dad's (knowing my sister would be there). I'm not pushing it in her face, but I'm not gonna deny my faith either. (Although, I don't live with her, so that would make things harder.) But, I will say that when I had a Mass said for my mother when she died, my sister showed up. I was shocked! I'm hoping that when I don't deny my faith, it shows my sister how serious it is and she will consider going to church one day.

 

[boughtwithaprice]

My sister is a hardcore atheist (so was my mom), at some point I just started stating my faith and let the fur fly. I wore a "This gal loves Jesus" t-shirt over to my dad's (knowing my sister would be there). I'm not pushing it in her face, but I'm not gonna deny my faith either. (Although, I don't live with her, so that would make things harder.) But, I will say that when I had a Mass said for my mother when she died, my sister showed up. I was shocked! I'm hoping that when I don't deny my faith, it shows my sister how serious it is and she will consider going to church one day.

If you want to convert your sister, you will be frustrated by preaching. Rather strive to obey God and His Church in all things. They won’t listen to our preaching but when they see the good that we do in obedience, they will give glory to God

As your sister, you have some authority over the spirits that are tormenting her. Read deliverance prayers for the laity, and pray the binding prayers to have the evil spirits leave her alone. She will then be free to choose to follow God or not.

We don’t convert anyone, but souls follow Christ because the Father draws them. When we preach above their objections, our pride of argument gets in the way of their conversion and drives them farther away. Humble obedience to God and His Church allows the Holy Spirit to work on their heart. Trust and obey and bring all your behavior in line with Catholic teaching. Don’t know what that is? Buy a Catechism and apply it to your life

 

[Chrystal-J]

If you want to convert your sister, you will be frustrated by preaching. Rather strive to obey God and His Church in all things. They won’t listen to our preaching but when they see the good that we do in obedience, they will give glory to God

As your sister, you have some authority over the spirits that are tormenting her. Read deliverance prayers for the laity, and pray the binding prayers to have the evil spirits leave her alone. She will then be free to choose to follow God or not.

We don’t convert anyone, but souls follow Christ because the Father draws them. When we preach above their objections, our pride of argument gets in the way of their conversion and drives them farther away. Humble obedience to God and His Church allows the Holy Spirit to work on their heart. Trust and obey and bring all your behavior in line with Catholic teaching. Don’t know what that is? Buy a Catechism and apply it to your life

I don't preach, but I don't agree with her when she says 'churches are money grubbing institutions'. I won't deny my faith in God for anyone, if they don't like it, that's just too bad. I fully expect to be persecuted for my faith in one way or the other. I do pray for her too (and my mom who I hope is in purgatory).

 

[boughtwithaprice]

I don't preach, but I don't agree with her when she says 'churches are money grubbing institutions'. I won't deny my faith in God for anyone, if they don't like it, that's just too bad. I fully expect to be persecuted for my faith in one way or the other. I do pray for her too (and my mom who I hope is in purgatory).

God bless you. Do you have any devotional prayers?

 

[Chrystal-J]

God bless you. Do you have any devotional prayers?

I pray nightly, but nothing structured.

 

[boughtwithaprice]

I pray nightly, but nothing structured.

I would recommend praying on your knees before you go to sleep, three Hail Mary’s every night
It’s very simple but focuses the mind toward prayer.
You should begin to build a habit of a daily Rosary or a little shorter devotion is to our Lady of Sorrows.

These begin to focus our mind on God’s mystery. They are not magic words that get us to have God act in our favor, but are ways of disciplining the body to detach our hearts from the things of this world and concentrate on Our Lord.

The three simple acts that get us closer to God are prayer, fasting and alms giving. Start small and work up. Go to mass and confession regularly to gain strength and not grow weary

God bless you

 

[WarriorAngel]

Hello Catholic family. I'm posting here again with a prayer request regarding my sister. So... Now that I'm wanting to explore being Catholic again, I feel a sudden desire to start speaking more clean rather than using crass language. My sister is one who curses like a sailor, especially when talking with me. It's in a playful manner, but I still feel like a bad person whenever I speak with such vulgarity these days, and I only ever seem to speak that way when I'm around her.

I could just outright tell my sister about my desire to speak clean again, but then she'll ask why... And I'd have to explain that I want to explore Catholicism again. The last time I expressed this desire, she accused me of going to "the dark side" and aligning myself with toxic ideologies. This mostly concerns her because she's also someone who considers herself to be LGBT, specifically bisexual and transgender. Every time I try to return to Christ, she threatens me by saying that if I "disrespect" her or her gender identity, we're "going to have a problem." We both live together at this point and I don't want to cause any rifts, especially considering that I love her like a best friend. I don't want to lose that... But then again, a best friend sibling wouldn't talk to their own flesh and blood like that, would they? And if I have to walk on eggshells every time I speak with her, then is this truly a friendship I should be striving to keep?

I'm going to try and see if I can speak with a deacon at my local church about some of these concerns, because it makes things difficult when trying to live out my faith. I'm scared, honestly... But then, when I look at the apostles and see how brave they were when facing those who were against God, I'm hardly holding a candle to their trials. I feel like I should stop being a coward and just come clean about my beliefs already. From there, I wouldn't be responsible for my sister's reaction. That would all be on herself... Still, it'll take a leap of great faith in order to proclaim my belief in God through his One Holy Church, because without her, I feel like I might not make it through life. We've both been through so much trauma together at the hands of our mother, so at the end of the day, I feel like she's all I've got left, despite both of my parents and families still being alive and well... It's just difficult with my families in particular due to in-fighting and things of that nature.

Please pray that I find the courage to speak the Truth and also that my family can be healed in some way from its various wounds and hurts.

Pray for her.

I suggest this a lot these days. But exorcism prayers are good and get Holy Water and put a drop in her coffee and or food etc daily and for yourself.
[Idea from a Catholic exorcist]