Removing the TV from the house?

[NoneyaBiznezz]

Has anyone had any experience with removing the television from your household? My wife and I are seriously considering it and we are catching quite a bit of flack from our family and friends.

Are we strange in wanting to remove this influence from our home?

 

[Lai]

I haven't done that, but I think it's a great idea!

I always said that I didn't want a TV, but my husband really wanted one and said that we could use it for 'educational' purposes. But... I think once the TV is in the house it is easy for it to replace other more important things.

We're very strict on what the kids watch, but I think removing the TV from the house completely is a great idea! Go for it! If it works for you, do it!

Lai

 

[NoneyaBiznezz]

My wife and I both work so our "face" time with the kids isn't as much as it could be. We are looking to replace the TV time with something more meaningful. We have always been very careful with the TV our children are allowed to watch (PBS and purchased videos). Our close family and friends don't think removing the TV is a good idea. The father in-law thinks it will lead to more TV time when the children are adults (He was raised without one and is now a couch potatoe in the evenings).

The question becomes this: Could removing the TV from the house actually cause more long term problems than the benefit of less at a younger age?

-Brian

 

[bliz]

Between grades 5 and 12 my family did not have a TV. As I recall, it was a hard adjustment at first but after while, it seemed quite normal. Yes, there were times when I had no idea what everyone else was talking about, but generally, it wasn't anything that important. We all became more creative, learned to fill our own time, and read a whole lot more.

My hunch is that if the father-in-law wasn't on the couch watching TV, he's be on the couch reading, or listening to the radio etc. No disrespect to the man, but his argument is "It's the lack of TV when I was growing up that makes me watch so much of it now."

There's an interesting book Four Arguments for the Elmination of Television. (I checked, Amazon carries it.) It is not just a matter of not watching trash. Watching even good programing distorts our thinking, the argument goes. People begin to think and at some level believe that if they have watched something on TV, that they have experienced it. There can be no comparison to watching film footage of people climb frozen waterfalls and actually climbing a frozen waterfall, but we are willing to settle for footage of the experience and even think we now know something of what the experience is like.

Frankly, it's a little scarey that friends and family view this as a bad idea! It makes me think that they are slightly threatened by this prospect. I mean, it's not like you are threatening to take away their TVs! Reminds me of my sister-in-law. She criticised how we raised our kids - we breast fed, and then for way too long, no junk food, limited TV, required manners, used a family bed... we did nothing right. But then she would tell us and everyone else what wonderful kids they were... but we had done everything wrong in getting them to be that way! Go figure.

Go for it!

 

[Lai]

Frankly, it's a little scarey that friends and family view this as a bad idea! It makes me think that they are slightly threatened by this prospect. I mean, it's not like you are threatening to take away their TVs!

I'm with Bliz here - maybe people are and would be threatened by the removal of the TV from their own home, but the reality is, this is your home, your decision, your children and your future.

I'm inclined to think, Brian, in answer to your question, and based on the reading I have done, that the long-term benefits would far outweigh the problems later in life.

Many years went by from the day man was created until TV was created, and if anything I think TV has caused problems. We now have many more media problems; an increased rate of young girls with eating disorders wanting to look like the stars on TV; increased rate of violence, many people copying TV... and we could go on and on and on......

Not to mention the simple fact that children [and adults!] NEED to stimulate their minds in other ways, ie. craft, reading, exercise, etc. and television is one thing which successfully stops people from doing those other things.

I've said my bit. Again. Hehehe...

Lai

 

[NoneyaBiznezz]

You guys Rock!! Thank you for your kind comments. I agree with you 100%. The being threatend point made by blitz may very well be the case. I believe that my father in-law knows that my children enjoy watching the videos, elmo, etc.. and it pains him to see us take this away from them. What he and the others don't seem to understand is that by taking the television away my wife and I are trying to give them so much more!! I truly believe that being able to lessen the influences of the outside world on our children can truly help shape them into the kind of adults that God wants them to be.

I have a 12 year old daughter that does not live with me. Her mother let's her watch just about anything that comes on the television. Her favorite show is "Friends" and her behavior leads me to believe that she sees this show as reality. The boyfriends, the sex, the cheating etc.. I can see this type of mentality in almost everything she does. I think that removing the television, even though for her it is just on the weekends, will force her to at least aknowledge that life doesn't happen in a 30min sitcom.

God bless you all,

-Brian

 

[desi]

People who get rid of tv are my heroes.

 

[Hands&Feet]

We went for seven years without TV. My sons were the top readers in their prospective classes, had a great imagination and have become excellent musicians. They compose their own music, lyrics and are creative writiers. The youngest just had his pottery showcased at a big art exhibit. I am convinced that none of this would have happened if we had TV. They never missed it.

 

[bliz]

Often when adult children make choices in how they live or how they raise their children that are different from the choices their parents made, the parents become threatened, hurt or insulted. I have seen this is a number of areas.

Grandmothers who bottle fed their own children are often quite opposed to their grandchildren being breastfed. Sometimes they feel that their daughters are saying "You didn't do what was best for me! This is a better way to feed babies!" Grandparents will often say "But I won't get to feed my own grandchild!"

Parents who select Christian school for their children will often be challenged and questioned by their own parents about such a choice. "What was wrong with the public school we sent you to? Didn't you get a good education? Aren't the kids going to be overprotected and sheltered? Will they at least learn to read and write?"

It is as if their children are rejecting their own upbringing. That's quite an insult!
It is also quite irrelevent. Parents are to make family choices and child rearing choices based upon what God has to say and what they think is best for their family.

Is there any room for compromise? How often do your parents come to the house? If it's not too frequent, could a visit by Granddad include the viewing of a favotrite video? Or, what if Granddad were willing to make a video - say, Granddad reading a favorite book to his grandkids?

Hang tough! You only get on chance to raise 'em. Make your first effort your best!

 

[Unix]

Are we strange in wanting to remove this influence from our home?

No, you're definately not strange. People who think you are strange because of that are infact strange themselves. It's more strange to have a TV than not

 

[NoneyaBiznezz]

Well, my wife and I have discussed it and prayed about it for a few weeks now. The TV is going away this weekend We have been getting the children ready for this change and they keep asking when it is going Bye-Bye. The TV hasn't been on all week and the kids haven't asked for us to turn it on once. I read an interesting article on the web that put things straight in my mind:

"Rabbi Ezriel Tauber, in a lecture, said that no one would ever put a sewer in their living room because no one wants the filth gushing right into the middle of their homes. Rabbi Tauber added that having a television was just like having a sewer, because it enabled the garbage and filth of society to flow indiscriminately into your home."

I also did a search on google and came up with this wonderful article in support of the No TV position:

http://www.simpletoremember.com/vitals/tvkelemen.htm

 

[Mrs. Enigma]

We didn't have a TV for part of the time when I was growing up.
My husband and I currently have a TV with no antenna connected to it, and we do not rent secular movies. We only watch documentaries or religious stuff, or use it for the sega. We are also very picky about what games we own. For a while my hubby and I did not have a TV. Whatever you decide, control what they view, and do not let them watch it a lot.

 

[mcb1998au]

I love my tv and could never get rid of it. We have satellite tv and i thought about getting it disconnected as i was sick of paying for adverts and so on. So we did a test run to find out how we would go without it. We didnt even last 24 hours so needless to say it is staying. We are also Playstation/ Gamecube buffs so to get rid of the tv is to get rid of the games. My 5 year old (and I) would be heartbroken.

 

[Sascha Fitzpatrick]

When I have children - I would like to have one television in the house - in a den or something, with it mainly covered over.

A friend of mine at school had this - television covered with a doiley and ornaments on it for most of her schooling life - they only started watching TV when she had to do written reports on shows for her BBusiness (Media and Communications) - plus she got 7s in every subject, so the lack of not being 'clued into' television for her whole childhood didn't seem to stop her getting great grades in a media subject!

I guess it all depends on my future hubby - my SO at present has a PS2, a television, VCR and DVD - I guess when it comes to us ever having children, we should be able to ensure that television is not a focal point of ours.

Maybe if we only used it for DVDs and videos? It is possible!

Sasch

 

[bliz]

Noney -

I hope this weekend goes well.

It is hardest in the beginning. Many of us are so in the habit of switching the thing on, it can be a real adjustment to not having it. Don't be surprised or discouraged if the first week is a little rough. That does not mean it will not go well or be benificial in the not-so-long run. Your family is learing to live without TV, and all learning is on a
J curve - it gets worse before it gets better.

 

[Jexel]

I am not religious at all and I do believe that not having a TV at home is a great idea. Once married and have children I would just use a tv to watch family memories that i recorded and so forth. My reason for this is because is not because of the content of tv shows or its context, is just that they will lack of focus from being knowledge able. My parents lived in a generation were they never had a TV until they reach 20 or older if they can survive without a tv programming then I know my future children and I can too. Plus I prefer to teach my children rather having depending on TV and school all the time, I believe the best schooling they would ever get is at home anyone who thinks otherwise should really question themselves if they beleive they are a good parent thinking outisde home education is better than in home for children. In life the natural process of knowledge starts at home.

 

[selune]

When I have children - I would like to have one television in the house - in a den or something, with it mainly covered over.

I guess it all depends on my future hubby - my SO at present has a PS2, a television, VCR and DVD - I guess when it comes to us ever having children, we should be able to ensure that television is not a focal point of ours.

Maybe if we only used it for DVDs and videos? It is possible!

Sasch

We have 2 one in the living room and 1 in the basement. Primary function gaming stations and video watching. Really we don't watch that much and it's nice to not be tethered to the tv.

 

[NoneyaBiznezz]

I am a big gamer as well.......I had an X-Box until eariler this week and decided to give it to some kids that could otherwise not have afforded one. I am heartbroken...lol. I have always played a lot of video games but mostly on the PC. I will always have a PC due to the nature of my work so I will have to get my gaming "fix" from there.

I believe the issue here is much larger than just TV. We, as parents, must take responsibility to raise our children to the best of our ability. TV or No TV, PC or no PC, Video Games or No Video Games.

My wife and I are not anti-televison. We believe that our household will be better off without one and the constant outside influence it has on our family. The time we used to spend watching the television "should" be spent in a more quality way. Our goal is to have our family grow from this experience. Emotionally, Spiritually, ect....

Thank you all for your wonderful insights!!

Any good ideas on occupying 12, 5 and 3 year old children?

Peace in Christ,

-Brian

 

[lucypevensie]

I know my response is late, but oh well... I grew up in a house with no TV until I was about 13 years old. I HATED not having a TV! To this day it bugs me! Mostly because of the holier-than-thou attitude of my parents. (WE don't NEED any TV in THIS house, WE'RE not LAZY, WE read BOOKS and WORK! People who sit and watch TV are just STUPID, blah, blah, blah). If you choose to get rid of the TV my advice is to do so quietly and graciously. While it is true that I read tons of books, and I'm glad I did, I really think it's OK to have a TV. Moderation and discernment are key factors. It's good for us to help our kids learn how to practice choosing good and bad, and how to spend our time wisely.

At our house TV is a priviledge, not a right. You can only watch TV if your chores are done for the day (mom and dad too). I'm happy to say that they choose many times to NOT watch TV and do something else instead.

 

[Sascha Fitzpatrick]

Absolutely - moderation is the key here

If you and your kids were spending every moment at home on tv, or on computer, or watching DVDs or the PS2/XBox/Gamecube, etc - then you'd have some problems.

And exactly - it should never be a 'holier than thou' attitude with anything - that's like the pharisess - and look what God felt about them!

Sasch