Remembering History Toward Survival and Success Forsaken by the Call to Forgive and FORGET?

[Monksailor]

It is an established fact that remembering history is a key to identifying situations or recognizing doorways which can lead or enter into destructive, painful, humiliating, counter-productive, less efficient, ...., negative consequences. We have to be cautious NOT to let the past sit in judgment of the present as bhsmte in his signature reminds us Winston Churchill once said, which is synonymous as saying not bearing a grudge, I think , because people and culture and other things can change along with us. But there are certain factors or variables when collaborated and/or synchronized which predicate predictable outcomes and when such discovery is made, sometimes at great pain and/or expense it is foolish to trash this information which could be so beneficial in the future. If someone who has hurt us deeply in the past for whom we have worked out forgiveness appears to be walking/storming into the same offense/perpetration again it would only be prudent and wise to try to be pre-emptive and check their current behavior against their past behavior BEFORE it has the possibility of damaging the relationship again.

Unfortunately, many times the past offender sees this, as your problem with bearing a grudge when that isn't the case at all. It is just the opposite. You love them and value your relationship so much with them that you do not want to lose another day out of relationship with them. You are trying to head it (a broken relationship, again) off at the pass. But they won't believe your good intent which leads to the sad conclusion that there never may have been repentance/reconciliation in THEIR heart.

As we age our memory gets duller, strokes can impede memory, PTSD can impede memory, Alzheimer's, dementia and many other things happen so memory loss is easier in some cases for the aged or war vets and other PTSD affected people, and there are a few cases of selective or dissociative amnesia BUT for the most part I think that forgetting an offense is not possible and those who say that they do do not mean that it is deleted from their memory BUT rather that the forgiveness has detached and deleted the negative feelings, intent, or grudge from the memory of the offense.

God can forget our sins, "remember them no more." He has absolutely no need to be concerned about His survival or success. In comparison to Him we are but dust gone unnoticed on a rock or leaf. Maybe, and most likely, when we are perfected in heaven our memories of potential threats to us will be deleted. Once we are covered with the blood of Jesus, God, the Father, sees Jesus, His one and only begotten and beloved Son, not us. Our sin need not be remembered as Jesus canceled our debt when we each receive Him and repent.

Some people come from loved and sheltered/protected childhoods and/or lives and grow up as all should have had, not having to formulate or dedicate parts of their memory for processing potential threats to their survival or being. Other people MUST allocate memory storage space at very early, impressionable ages for threat assessment in order just to survive; live, as they are the ONLY one looking out for themselves. There is no loving and protecting mother or father or guardian. Such a matrix is deeply integrated into the mind/character. Maybe that is a differentiation to be considered here, also?

What do you think?

 

[com7fy8]

Yes, we forgive wrong people, but we need to test if and how God wants us to trust them. Make sure with God; do not go only by anyone's say-so and acting and toning of their voice.

And in case you get more or less involved with a forgiven person, stay with your good example, do not allow him or her to steer you without you knowing you are being led by the Holy Spirit.

Be aware of any ways and motives of yours, which helped you to get into the wrong place with the person; and now do not allow these ways and motives to effect how you now relate with the person.

Do not let someone break you down by getting you arguing. Arguing can get you weak so you can be controlled and in bondage with a person. So can complaining and gossip > do not join in or approve of complaining and gossip, or this can get you weak enough to then be steered the wrong way and weak so you can suffer emotionally and be hurt.

"And who is he who will harm you if you become followers of what is good?" (1 Peter 3:13)

So, while we obey Jesus in His love, we have His almighty protection > the beauty of His gentle and humble love is "incorruptible" > 1 Peter 3:4. So, when someone gets the better of me, this is my fault . . . first to deal with, with how God corrects and changes me to be strong in His love and sensible.