- Sep 2, 2013
- 1,534
- 1,435
- 31
- Country
- United States
- Gender
- Female
- Faith
- Baptist
- Marital Status
- Celibate
My relationship is on a rocky foundation and I feel so helpless and concerned, and just want to turn to you lovely people about it.
I have been in a relationship for seven months now. My boyfriend lives eight hours away and has been trying to find a better paying job so he can move closer to me. He tried before to get a job in the area he majored in, but he only has an associates and they won't take him. He struggles to even get hired by a simple retail or an independent fast food place. His parents are overbearing and baby him, and seem to want to keep him there. His father recently suggested a whole new degree he could major in because its "useful" but his current degree, if continues it and goes for a bachelors, can be just as useful. He made a promise to me in February that I would only have to wait two years to date him in person, but recently discovered that promise was made with no knowledge of what might happen, and the fear of losing me. He also told me that I have been pressuring him, but I sincerely have done no such thing. NO ONE pushes him; he has never been pushed. My parents always pushed me to become independent and to make my own decisions; have my own life. His parents don't do that, and it always concerns me.
I offer him advice. I've helped him in his job searching. I have encouraged him, supported him, and listened to him when he has had his bad days. I tell him of ways he find a better job, where he can eventually move down here. It always felt like I was talking to a wall. I felt like he wasn't listening much. Eventually he stopped looking for jobs. Meanwhile, he does read the Bible or pray to God like I do. I always encourage him to have a relationship with the Lord, and while he always answers my statement all I ever got was a "I know". His relationship with the Lord is as important to me, and my relationship with Him is important to my boyfriend as well. But he never acts on it. He loves Christ but he doesn't live the Christian life, it seems, and no matter what I do in trying to help him, both with work and his relationship with God, nothing just seems to work.
It was the night after our little dispute that I pretty much cried to God that night in prayer and told Him that I have done all I could to help my boyfriend, and that I give it to Him now, because I feel it is the only thing I can do now. I've helped; I've tried to be a good and caring, supportive girlfriend. But it seems it has not done much and I feel terrible and helpless, and things have been rocky with our situation.
My apologies for the long post but I really needed to get it off my chest and just talk to others.
I have been in a relationship for seven months now. My boyfriend lives eight hours away and has been trying to find a better paying job so he can move closer to me. He tried before to get a job in the area he majored in, but he only has an associates and they won't take him. He struggles to even get hired by a simple retail or an independent fast food place. His parents are overbearing and baby him, and seem to want to keep him there. His father recently suggested a whole new degree he could major in because its "useful" but his current degree, if continues it and goes for a bachelors, can be just as useful. He made a promise to me in February that I would only have to wait two years to date him in person, but recently discovered that promise was made with no knowledge of what might happen, and the fear of losing me. He also told me that I have been pressuring him, but I sincerely have done no such thing. NO ONE pushes him; he has never been pushed. My parents always pushed me to become independent and to make my own decisions; have my own life. His parents don't do that, and it always concerns me.
I offer him advice. I've helped him in his job searching. I have encouraged him, supported him, and listened to him when he has had his bad days. I tell him of ways he find a better job, where he can eventually move down here. It always felt like I was talking to a wall. I felt like he wasn't listening much. Eventually he stopped looking for jobs. Meanwhile, he does read the Bible or pray to God like I do. I always encourage him to have a relationship with the Lord, and while he always answers my statement all I ever got was a "I know". His relationship with the Lord is as important to me, and my relationship with Him is important to my boyfriend as well. But he never acts on it. He loves Christ but he doesn't live the Christian life, it seems, and no matter what I do in trying to help him, both with work and his relationship with God, nothing just seems to work.
It was the night after our little dispute that I pretty much cried to God that night in prayer and told Him that I have done all I could to help my boyfriend, and that I give it to Him now, because I feel it is the only thing I can do now. I've helped; I've tried to be a good and caring, supportive girlfriend. But it seems it has not done much and I feel terrible and helpless, and things have been rocky with our situation.
My apologies for the long post but I really needed to get it off my chest and just talk to others.
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