Relating to Humans is Difficult

[Snowman37]

Though I am human, I must say that I find it very difficult to relate to my fellow human beings. I have a good friend whom I often debate human nature with. Basically, I find him too sinful, though I know his journey through life will take him straight toward God and Christ. He is a Christian, he just has a lot of growing up to do. In contrast, he finds me too squeaky, clean to the point where he calls me robot and grandpa. I don't like to curse, though I do sometimes when I loose my temper. I don't like raunchy comedies, though all of my friends do. I don't like to discuss sexuality beyond anatomical topics. In fact, I have purged sexuality from my life as best I can. I have never felt for anyone, I have never paired with anyone. I am proud of this and plan to stay this way for the rest of my life. Again, my friend doesn't get this. He mistakes it for being cold, disconnected. I, in turn, do not understand the human capacity for lust. I get the need to pair off, to have children. Lusting for the sake of lust is beyond me. It is not logical, and thus I find it near impossible to argue against lust for I know not why people lust. I love God, Christ is my savior, and I seek... I don't know what I seek. Really, I seek nothing. I could die tonight, and I would be ready for God and can say I lived a happy life. There is nothing for me beyond now except God and Christ, family, friendship, animal companions, good food... and... well, my life is simple, and I like it that way. I often feel like my friends are children in comparison to myself. I am 27, they are mostly around 20 years of age (I met them at community college); and they are the first "real" friends I have ever had. However, I spend more time telling them what to do and not do then I do just hanging out and being mellow. They tell me to relax, but how can I relax when there are so many horrors going on in both my life and across the Earth? Sometimes, I feel like I understand animals more than people. What you see is what you get. With people, it is unnecessarily complicated. Why?

Sometimes, I just feel as if I were born in the wrong century. If only I could have been born in the 18th or 19th century.

 

[SoldierOfSoul]

Why do you feel you must judge others all the time? You need to remember that there is only One Judge and its not you or me. It's hard to live your own life if all you do is care about how someone else is living theirs.

 

[Snowman37]

I do not judge per say. I just try to offer guidance. It pains me to see my friends intentionally partake in sin. I'm not judging, but rather franticly trying to keep sin at bay.

 

[lutherangerman]

I have a friend who is like that too. She is a wonderful, deep human but I know she is missing some things.

It is best to want the best. The complete life, the complete blessing, a thorough experience of the human journey. The whole will of God.

But I am talking out of my butt, like anyone else I am narrow and don't naturally want to be wise.

Jesus said that those who crave to be filled with PERFECT righteousness shall be filled. But many just want enough righteousness to be safe. Perfect righteousness, I think, is deeply passionate in love. You need to burn. You need to do things from the heart and not because of a mental construction process in your mind that always calculates the odds in your favor.

 

[Snowman37]

I'm not really sure how to digest what you said. My friends sin, and it pains me to see them sin. When I say I am trying to keep sin at bay, it is not for my benefit, I do it for my friends' sake. Am I wrong for wanting to cut sin from their lives however I can?

 

[SoldierOfSoul]

I'm not really sure how to digest what you said. My friends sin, and it pains me to see them sin. When I say I am trying to keep sin at bay, it is not for my benefit, I do it for my friends' sake. Am I wrong for wanting to cut sin from their lives however I can?

You cannot do it only Jesus can, sometimes the best thing you can do is just pray.

 

[laconicstudent]

I'm not really sure how to digest what you said. My friends sin, and it pains me to see them sin. When I say I am trying to keep sin at bay, it is not for my benefit, I do it for my friends' sake. Am I wrong for wanting to cut sin from their lives however I can?

Should you not be worrying about your own salvation?

 

[Snowman37]

My salvation is irrelevant for there can only be two outcomes: saved or damned. I believe myself to be saved for I have given myself to Christ and God. Do I still sin, sure, I am but a mere human with limitations and weaknesses, but I try. Knowing my friends partake in sin weighs so heavily upon me to where I feel physically ill in not knowing what to do about it.

 

[laconicstudent]

My salvation is irrelevant for there can only be two outcomes: saved or damned. I believe myself to be saved for I have given myself to Christ and God. Do I still sin, sure, I am but a mere human with limitations and weaknesses, but I try. Knowing my friends partake in sin weighs so heavily upon me to where I feel physically ill in not knowing what to do about it.

.....Fascinating.

What about your own sins?

 

[SoldierOfSoul]

Let it go and give it to Christ who is the only one who can bare it. It almost seems to be a compulsive thing with you. Yes, you need to give this all to God and let Him let you go on with your life. Jesus has it under control, you worrying all the time is not helping the situation.

 

[Snowman37]

I know my sins. Each time I pray to God, I admit all of my sins aloud, even if but a whisper. I believe it important to recognize all sins before God aloud, though I know not why. I pray for the strength and wisdom necessary to nullify each and every sin from my life. I try, and I try. The greatest sin I struggle with is apathy.

 

[SoldierOfSoul]

It seems to me your life is consumed with "sin" if not yours then someone else's, you need to discover the "joy" of salvation my friend. Jesus loves you and He's not out to get you, He desires holiness yes, but He also desires our happiness if possible in this world. Don't let consciousness of sin ruin your life, you are free from this bondage in Christ.

"Let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water." (Hebrews 10:22)

 

[Snowman37]

Joy does not interest me, though profit does. There are so many bills, expenses, and debts to pay off; and it's a never ending process. Only when I can profit enough to silence my financial nightmare can I find joy. Alas, that is years and years beyond now; thus joy must stay aside in the name of the quest for profit.

 

[laconicstudent]

Snowman, have you ever discussed these issues of yours' with a counselor or other licensed mental health care provider?

 

[Snowman37]

I don't believe in consulting with counselors or "licensed mental health care providers." A true counselor would dispense wisdom freely, not charge you money you likely cannot afford to part with. In all probability, they are there for the paycheck more than they are to help. That may be cynical, but I have little faith in the vile human species.

The only counseling I am interested in is how to find a job from which one can make a lot of profit with an educational background no higher than a GED. Anything less would be a waste of time.

 

[laconicstudent]

I don't believe in consulting with counselors or "licensed mental health care providers." A true counselor would dispense wisdom freely, not charge you money you likely cannot afford to part with. In all probability, they are there for the paycheck more than they are to help. That may be cynical, but I have little faith in the vile human species.

Interesting point of view. Completely unrealistic of course, but interesting.

The only counseling I am interested in is how to find a job from which one can make a lot of profit with an educational background no higher than a GED. Anything less would be a waste of time.

Well, for starters, there aren't many such jobs.

Second, do you not see greed as a sin? Perhaps your friends aren't too eager to change because they see that you aren't exactly in a position to be judging their own sins.

 

[Snowman37]

Acquisition of wealth is not greed when trying to pay your bills and extinguish debt.

 

[aldar]

Snowman,

Hello friend. Your first real friends you ever had you met at college level age and they are also not your own age. I think that is the source of your troubles. You are extremely detached from the world around you and you have been for a very very long time. For whatever reason you lack common things that most people in the world can share a common interest in, like sex and sexuality for just one example. You lack the understanding of how they live and you probably lack the social skills to begin to understand them as well. They probably pity you as much as you pity them and them telling you to relax is a form of accommodating you, trying to tell you a little bit about themselves and how they think you should act.

Back to the issue of being able to relate, you need friends, more friends, more and more friends. You need to experience things and most of all you need to take off the incredibly analytical mask that you see them through and just begin to listen, listen more than you think and more than you talk because as wrong or sinful as they may be you have quite a bit learn as well ya know?Also don't make your time with them only an experiment or chance for learning, you need to enjoy yourself and them. If they are your friends, do not use them as opportunities to expunge sin from the world, they are your friends, the few friends you have and eventually even if slowly they can and will leave you if you begin to be only the occasion of sin in their life. If that is all you contribute to them, the message of sin and rightful living, unless they are extremely religious they will leave.

Go places, have fun, laugh, do something you all enjoy, learn to enjoy yourself with them and that enjoyment will open new parts of you and you'll see new parts of them and you'll bond together and you'll learn more about them and be able to relate and probably learn a lot yourself.

I am not trying to be mean, that is the best advice I can give.

 

[aldar]

Snowman,

That may be cynical, but I have little faith in the vile human species.

The only counseling I am interested in is how to find a job from which one can make a lot of profit with an educational background no higher than a GED. Anything less would be a waste of time.

I am sorry friend, but you are conceited and you are lazy. That you consider humans vile is astonishing. You could certainly object but from what I have read you seem to have taken much pride what seems like elevation above the rest of the world and their idiosyncrasies, their lusts, their foolish endeavors and enjoyments... your trip into correctness and what seems like an enlightened mind. Are you sure you even want friends? Do you want to understand them? How can you judge them... you know close to nothing about them.

Did you graduate college? You don't seem to value higher learning, you foolishly judge mental health counselors based on no information at all but rather your own detached feelings that come a person who has little to no experience with the world around him and willingly judges them as well. What do you know of these people? You have hardly any friends and your moments with them consist you trying to teach them and them trying to teach you how to live. What do you know humans? You seem quite analytical but your very anti-intellectual as well. Your steeped in emotionalism and fundamentalism.

You have little understanding of how the world works, mental health care providers are supposed to give you hours, days, months of their life peering into your dark soul and try to fix you... for free? They went to school for probly 8 long years and have become quite erudite painfully to devote hours and hours and hours listening to you with a skill that 99% of people don't have and giving you information that 99% of people don't have to try to fix you... for free? Your the one with problem, you have to make an investment as well. And where is this benevolence in you? This willingness to call everyone vile and evil and greedy that you demonstrate, where is your goodness? Where is your great benevolence? Where is your willingness to freely give what you spent years to get?
Also, people don't get a doctorate in the social services or in the health care field for the paycheck too often, its a dirty job and unless you have a true interest in helping people you don't usually do it.

You can't have joy becuase you have bills... that doesn't really make sense. Are you at work 16 hours a day? Do you have a college degree? Have you invested what you need to in order to make yourself profitable? Why can't you go for a walk in the park after you get off work? Play a video game. Or better yet get a good job, a college degree, your 27 years old you could have two degrees by now you could have a doctorate and have absolutely no financial burdens at all. You aren't willing to go get the education you need to be valuable to people so they will give you money but you complain about bills and say they are greedy.

Please start looking at yourself, take responsibility for yourself, stop viciously judging everyone else and admit that you snowman, you have a lot to learn and alot of work to do. Most of your problems involve you, friend.

 

[LWB]

Well Snowman37, I find you to be quite an interesting character. I can relate to some degree to how you feel towards other people.

I think things are complicated with people, rather than our pets for example, because we have to compete with other humans. Our own greatest enemy for a long time has been our own species, so we are probably hardwired to always be on our toes in their company.

Even on a Christian forum, with people committed to the concept of loving each other, there is typical primate posturing and hen pecking. Already it seems you have come under attack!

It is fortunate that the Lord is a lot more forgiving than your average human. I gain a great deal of consolation studying the life of our Lord, and imagining how beautiful he was with the tax collectors and sinners he kept company with. His love for them would have melted all their defences, so I think we too can learn to just love them and relax, and laugh at their oddities and eccentricities.