You Might Be A Redneck If....
You've ever stood outside a K-mart for more than an hour arguing with the manager about the shirt and shoes law.:o
You've ever gone Christmas shopping at the dollar store.
You've ever shoplifted Spam.
You don't understand why Bo and Luke never tried to get it on with Daisy.
Your son has ever stolen disected frogs from Biology class so that your family won't go hungry.
You prefer the Sears catolog to Charmin.
Your blood alcohol content has ever exceeded your I.Q.
You've ever been stuck in your own driveway.
You refer to your dog as the dishwasher.
You thought ER was ET's cousin.
Your brother-in-law is your uncle.
You entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one.
Your lips move while reading a stop sign.
You think the blood on the front of your pickup truck looks cool.
You think the blood on the back of your pickup truck looks cool.
The worst day of your life was when you dropped your bottle of Jack Daniels the other day.
The best day of your life was when you found an unopened bottle of Jack Daniels "over yonder in them hills."
Your wife has ever burned out an electric razor.
You think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.
People hear your car long before they see it.
You watch cartoons long after your kids get bored.
Your pocketknife has ever been referred to as Exhibit A.
You consider duct tape and tarp straps necessities for auto body repair.
You refer to your truck as if it had a legal first name.
You can sense a storm coming by a mysterious twitching in your knee.
You've ever climbed a water tower with a bucket of paint to defend your sister's honor.
Your driveway is two tire tracks with grass growing down the middle.
The idea for the Budweiser frogs came from listening to you and your friends trying to read the label on the bottle.
Your momma has ever stomped into the house and announced, "The feud is back on!"
Your idea of a neighborhood watch program is tuning into "America's Most Wanted"
You go to Wal-Mart to people watch.
You ask your 10-year old son how to spell a word.
Your dog is your alarm clock.
It takes you and 31 others in the same room to show off a full set of teeth.
Smile!God loves You
You've ever stood outside a K-mart for more than an hour arguing with the manager about the shirt and shoes law.:o
You've ever gone Christmas shopping at the dollar store.
You've ever shoplifted Spam.
You don't understand why Bo and Luke never tried to get it on with Daisy.
Your son has ever stolen disected frogs from Biology class so that your family won't go hungry.
You prefer the Sears catolog to Charmin.
Your blood alcohol content has ever exceeded your I.Q.
You've ever been stuck in your own driveway.
You refer to your dog as the dishwasher.
You thought ER was ET's cousin.
Your brother-in-law is your uncle.
You entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one.
Your lips move while reading a stop sign.
You think the blood on the front of your pickup truck looks cool.
You think the blood on the back of your pickup truck looks cool.
The worst day of your life was when you dropped your bottle of Jack Daniels the other day.
The best day of your life was when you found an unopened bottle of Jack Daniels "over yonder in them hills."
Your wife has ever burned out an electric razor.
You think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.
People hear your car long before they see it.
You watch cartoons long after your kids get bored.
Your pocketknife has ever been referred to as Exhibit A.
You consider duct tape and tarp straps necessities for auto body repair.
You refer to your truck as if it had a legal first name.
You can sense a storm coming by a mysterious twitching in your knee.
You've ever climbed a water tower with a bucket of paint to defend your sister's honor.
Your driveway is two tire tracks with grass growing down the middle.
The idea for the Budweiser frogs came from listening to you and your friends trying to read the label on the bottle.
Your momma has ever stomped into the house and announced, "The feud is back on!"
Your idea of a neighborhood watch program is tuning into "America's Most Wanted"
You go to Wal-Mart to people watch.
You ask your 10-year old son how to spell a word.
Your dog is your alarm clock.
It takes you and 31 others in the same room to show off a full set of teeth.
Smile!God loves You
