Ready to quit...but can't

[redeemedbygrace24]

sometimes I feel utterly fed up, ready to quit everything

I feel hurt, mistreated, misunderstood, and abused yet I keep living and I keep giving life and my walk with God a chance. It's frustrating because I'm not sure what's driving me. How come I just won't quit?

Maybe I'm just afraid of what will happen, not sure if I'm staying in the race out of fear or out of love for Him. Maybe it's not even me doing this, sounds weird

I think we are stronger than we think we are. The will to live kicks in and God give us grace. I pray that He will have continued mercy and grace for all of us who have battled depression and oppression. It gets so hard but I have a glimmer of hope that it can and will get better... holding on...

Blessings

 

[SarahsKnight]

Believe me, I hear you, my dear.

But yes, if you ever get the urge to quit or give up, please take my words to heart that it is most likely just a temporary feeling, your mere human mind playing tricks on you (at least, that is the conclusion I came to eventually in my similar situation about 2 years ago), nothing more, so please don't be frightened by it (if you have ever felt fear because of it). This is just me, but I don't think Jesus will let you "give up", even if you feel for a moment or two that you want to. He is, after all, the author and finisher of our faith, is He not? (But for the record, if that sounds Calvinistic, know that I do not take that stance, at least not in terms of the Calvinistic TULIP principle.)

Just keep hoping, just keep on believing. This isn't much practical help, I know, but believe me, I don't see why you'd ever abandon Christ or He would you, the way you speak. I am sure that you'll make it.



And one last thing: stay for love and reverence of God (because He is almighty and yet good to you even though you are just a human and mortal and imperfect), not because you are afraid of Him. I place all my bets that He would rather have a child who serves Him out of love and gratitude, not because that child is afraid of the lash.


I hope it helped, sister.

 

[redeemedbygrace24]

So true, and I agree

Perfect love casts out all fear. I appreciate your honest and kind response. I don't know why abandoning Christ would seem even to be an option, but at times, I guess I just want to fall back from my level of commitment. I feel that I need help and more rest in this area

Yes it is temporary, and I'm very glad that I didn't follow my flesh because I would have made things worse. I would say it is a mixture of things but Love mainly which is the greatest gift. Love for Him. Appreciation for His consistent patience with me. He's helped me so much.

I made it through today, will keep walking...

 

[knw1991]

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=50lu1j2r53I

Please listen to this song it's beautiful and full of hope

 

[SarahsKnight]

I don't know why abandoning Christ would seem even to be an option, but at times, I guess I just want to fall back from my level of commitment. I feel that I need help and more rest in this area

Well, I am sure you will get to rest eventually. After all, during my time when my OCD was really bad I seriously thought it would never end, or at least get better, and God still came through, perhaps when He felt it was time to give me rest. I have hope that it will some day be the same for you. (And seriously, my friend, if you have not considered medication to help with this, yet, please give it some thought and research. As far from 100% accurate as the study of the human brain is, God still put doctors on this planet to help us along, after all.)


As to abandoning Christ seeming like an option, honestly, I don't think it is for you. You might sometimes FEEL like you are considering it, but again, it may all just be in your head and you just need time and the comfort of loved ones to work it out. Even if, say, you gave in for a moment and seriously said, "I quit", I still don't even think God will let you go. He knows your limits, and He understands we humans are weak oftentimes. You have to believe and trust in His good kindness and understanding, sister. I have come to the belief that it is a far better way to honor Him than to fear that He may be against you in any way, especially if you're trying this hard. He's willing to be for us, not against us.

For what it's worth, a particular Bible passage I recited to help me through my struggle was Lamentations 3:21-23. Indeed, it is very beautiful and encouraging. Great is His faithfulness, even when we may feel faithless.

 

[Krissy Cakes]

I'm praying for you.

 

[Criada]

Praying for you, sweetie.

 

[redeemedbygrace24]

Well, I am sure you will get to rest eventually. After all, during my time when my OCD was really bad I seriously thought it would never end, or at least get better, and God still came through, perhaps when He felt it was time to give me rest. I have hope that it will some day be the same for you. (And seriously, my friend, if you have not considered medication to help with this, yet, please give it some thought and research. As far from 100% accurate as the study of the human brain is, God still put doctors on this planet to help us along, after all.)


As to abandoning Christ seeming like an option, honestly, I don't think it is for you. You might sometimes FEEL like you are considering it, but again, it may all just be in your head and you just need time and the comfort of loved ones to work it out. Even if, say, you gave in for a moment and seriously said, "I quit", I still don't even think God will let you go. He knows your limits, and He understands we humans are weak oftentimes. You have to believe and trust in His good kindness and understanding, sister. I have come to the belief that it is a far better way to honor Him than to fear that He may be against you in any way, especially if you're trying this hard. He's willing to be for us, not against us.

For what it's worth, a particular Bible passage I recited to help me through my struggle was Lamentations 3:21-23. Indeed, it is very beautiful and encouraging. Great is His faithfulness, even when we may feel faithless.

Yes I am currently seeing a doctor for Chronic Fatigue induced by chronic stress and trauma from a bad job situation and much more. This is why I am not emotionally able to handle what I could normally. I feel like my boundaries are being pushed and have reached a very broken point in my life, and it gets difficult seeing myself pressing forward yet I still awake each day and can manage to go to work and to appear normal. I am hurting deeply inside.

I'm comforted that He does know that we are but flesh (Psalm 103:13-14). I struggle with trust, and I'm glad you mentioned this. I have trust issues and I am sometimes paranoid about my relationship with God. I try so hard, but I think I'm not fully receiving His love. I'm not sure what it is, but I recognize I need help. Yes I am trying very hard, yet it seems that I'm coming up short...maybe not

Thanks for those verses

 

[SarahsKnight]

It's a very tragic fact that so many of us humans, especially believers, end up going through these seeming faith crises, but, like it or not, we must endure it. Just call for us if you need help in some way over your struggle, or even just to have a shoulder to cry on. I am sure I speak for at least everyone who has responded in this thread that we'll be here for you.

I will try to remember you in prayers consistently, my friend.

 

[redeemedbygrace24]

I think it's tragic as well and very sad. I'm grateful that God loves us despite what we endure, thanks again

 

[Jeshu]

I found that depression and its struggle with God and His truths is all about spiritual blessings being bestowed upon us.

I know it is hard to trust in an all loving God when we are deeply depressed and hurting, but then spiritual complacency hasn't got room in our hearts, for we really have to fight for God's loving truth.

The truth is that God loves us dearly and that no matter how much we want to give up He keeps us going and growing. He empties our hearts of all the things that can be shaken and then leaves us stable and firm in our faith afterwards.

Please do keep putting your faith in His loving truth, with Him on board we can master our depression but without Him depression is truly a hell on earth.




Jesus rescues

When depression reigns
and all seems lost!
When regrets demand an ear
shame and guilt burn our hearts!

When loneliness attacks
and despair pounds!
When hopelessness compels
and the pit looms!

Then call upon Jesus
and let Him save you!
Then cling to His love
His grace will comfort you!

Then shelter underneath His wings
and find protection from bad life!
Then in His love there is safety
as we are made anew!