Re Dos

[vic74]

We all know that in marriage, there are ups and downs. We say and do things that really hurt our spouses that we regret. I want to know if you could go back in time, what would be the one thing you'd take back that you know really hurt your spouse?
Mine was when in an one sided arguement, ( only I was doing the arguing), I called my husband a dummy for not rising to the occassion. This was like a whip to his back, because for years, that's what his father called him. It wasn't until later in life he was diagnosed with aspergers syndrome. I wish that that I could remove those words from his memories and mines, but I can't.


Let's keep this a judgement free thread, please.
[BIBLE]For he who is without sin may he cast the first stone.[/BIBLE]

 

[Redguard]

Are you looking for instances that occurred post-marriage, or do things that took place during the courting years count as well.

 

[Mskedi]

I think we've both said stupid things in ways that we shouldn't have, but had we not an entire issue that we didn't even know was bugging us wouldn't have come out into the open.

The sting stinks for a bit, but in the long run it's been worth it. It doesn't happen often or anything (I can think of two times in our entire relatinoship).

I guess the key is that nothing has been said with the intent to hurt the other. I hope we maintain that.

 

[vic74]

Are you looking for instances that occurred post-marriage, or do things that took place during the courting years count as well.

I guess, both. it does not matter.

 

[jwwells]

Hmmm, tough one. I do believe that words hurt more than most people give them credit for.

I do know one problem we have. I'm not very loquacious, she wakes up talking and is still talking when she goes to bed. Usually, I don't mind at all. She often has some very interesting stories to tell.

Sometimes though! If I'm sick, I just can't take the noise. Plus, sometimes I do want to talk and that can be hard to get in between her words.

A fairly minor problem, but persistent.

As for hurtful words ... I think everyone will do wrong sometimes. That's where apologizing and KNOWING we've done wrong becomes so very important: It's also important to forget-forgive the bad-behavior.