random thoughts/questions <grin>

[irrationality72]

Ok, so first, a little background on me.

I was born and raised in church, never questioned a single thing I was taught until I was in my teenage years. Then I began to feel like I didn't belong in church. I hated being dragged there every Sunday and Wednesday. I wanted to be a good little Christian girl, in order to please my parents, you know, but every time I tried to please them in that way it left me unhappy.

My parents were pretty unhappy when I started listening to secular music, hanging out with people who weren't Christians, started watching rated R movies, started using some profanity, and started dressing as I pleased. At first it was just a rebellion thing, I suppose, but once I became open minded it kinda stuck with me.

Fast forward to now.

My parents still don't like many of my friends or my tastes in movies, music, and clothes. They also don't like my sense of humor. What's really gonna get them, though, is when they find out that the guy I'm dating now is an atheist. <grin> Quite honestly, though, he's the most awesome, brilliant, funny guy I've ever been with.

They would complain that we are "unequally yoked." But is that really the case here? I mean, I believe in God. But I don't know -what- I am, religiously speaking. I don't think I can say I'm a Christian, in your usual sense. I think church is pretty pointless and I can't say that I pray or read my Bible a lot.

I mean, Christians are cool and all. After all, that's what my family is. But I feel like they're so narrow minded and have impossible standards. Even when I was a by-the-book Christian, I wasn't sure I could get to heaven being that it seemed like you had to be so perfect in order to get there. And I am -far- from perfect.

Would God really forgive a person like me? Could I even live like I'm "supposed" to? Or am I too messed up to even bother with?

Sometimes religion feels pointless to me. It just breeds hatred in most instances. Even amongst just different denominations.

Now I forget where I was going with this but yeah, thoughts? Opinions?

 

[drich0150]

They would complain that we are "unequally yoked." But is that really the case here?

If you seek God in any sense of the term, then yes you would be unequally yoked.

But I feel like they're so narrow minded and have impossible standards.

I believe this is a very narrow view of Christianity.

Even when I was a by-the-book Christian, I wasn't sure I could get to heaven being that it seemed like you had to be so perfect in order to get there. And I am -far- from perfect.

So is anyone who is honest with Himself. Paul spoke of all of his short comings in the book of Romans. He points to the fact that if we were perfect that we would not need Christ. He also says that just because we know we will sin we should not turn into our sinful nature.

Would God really forgive a person like me?

Because if you are sincere about your repentance, you would be no different than any of the rest of us.

Could I even live like I'm "supposed" to?

No one can live a perfect life.

Or am I too messed up to even bother with?

You should try and read the book of Romans It gives us freedom the idea of having to live a perfect life.

Sometimes religion feels pointless to me. It just breeds hatred in most instances. Even amongst just different denominations.

Indeed it can, but it can also support and feed those who are young in the Spirit.

 

[secondtimearound]

Luke 15:11-32
In this case it may be the lost daughter.
The Parable of the Lost Son

11 Jesus continued: &#8220;There was a man who had two sons. 12 The younger one said to his father, &#8216;Father, give me my share of the estate.&#8217; So he divided his property between them.


13 &#8220;Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. 14 After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. 15 So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. 16 He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.

17 &#8220;When he came to his senses, he said, &#8216;How many of my father&#8217;s hired servants have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! 18 I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. 19 I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.&#8217; 20 So he got up and went to his father.

&#8220;But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.

21 &#8220;The son said to him, &#8216;Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.&#8217;

22 &#8220;But the father said to his servants, &#8216;Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23 Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let&#8217;s have a feast and celebrate. 24 For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.&#8217; So they began to celebrate.

25 &#8220;Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. 26 So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. 27 &#8216;Your brother has come,&#8217; he replied, &#8216;and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.&#8217;

28 &#8220;The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. 29 But he answered his father, &#8216;Look! All these years I&#8217;ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. 30 But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!&#8217;
31 &#8220;&#8216;My son,&#8217; the father said, &#8216;you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. 32 But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.&#8217;&#8221;

 

[AlexBP]

If you read the gospels, you will see quite plainly that Jesus hung out with the disreputable elements of society, while criticizing those who were certain of their own righteousness. Nobody can lose their salvation through lifestyle choices such as dressing the wrong way or using profanity. Anybody who accepts the love that Jesus offers will be saved.

If you were to have a serious talk with your parents about why they feel the way they do, I reckon that what they'd tell you is this. While the lifestyle choices we're discussing here are minor, your parents fear that they make be the first few steps on a path away from the way that they've raised you. They fear that if you continue down that path, it may lead you to choice that are truly dangerous. Perhaps your parents in their childhood did the "sex, drugs, and rock&roll" lifestyle, or maybe they had friends or family members who did. Because they have that experience they don't want you to have to go through the same experience.

 

[jehoiakim]

I hear and agree with a lot of your concerns about how religion can be a dangerous thing... that is because we have made it into a monster. You have heard the cliche I am sure "Christianity is a relationship, not a religion." Ultimately that should be the point but rarely does anyone ever seem to live up to that. We keep making it into a religion because a relationship takes a lot more work.

It sounds like in your experience your parents may have been too controlling in your life to trust or allow you to discover Christianity for yourself, they tried to mold you to fit into their own understanding of it. When people do that, they are usually very committed but have a very shallow understanding of their faith. You might observe grains of truth but so much else is mixed with the wrong priorities that the most important points are made.

Are you worthy to be saved? non of us are, but God is love and God is not only willing but wanting jealously to bring every single one of us into a relationship with him. That is the beauty of Christianity is that God is love, God is not some sadistic angry old man that wants to beat us all into submission, if you want to understand God I suggest you start with Christ and the gospels and if you have questions then that is wonderful, it means you are exercising your brain.

I encourage you to try and take another look at it and discover faith for yourself, if you disagree with someones interpretation that is not necessarily a reason to dismiss them or their opinion, we are all flawed people, not one of us can have perfect understanding, but if you can find a group of people (even if it is just a few in a larger congregation)whose greatest priority is love, patience,respect, humility and honesty then you have found a healthy environment. I imagine your parents would agree with me that Jesus is everything, all that matters and the only way, but on a lot of other things I am sure we would disagree. Some things in your serach for faith should remain key for fellowship, there should be unity in the essentials, understanding and grace in the non-essentials and love everywhere.

 

[solarwave]

They would complain that we are "unequally yoked." But is that really the case here? I mean, I believe in God. But I don't know -what- I am, religiously speaking. I don't think I can say I'm a Christian, in your usual sense. I think church is pretty pointless and I can't say that I pray or read my Bible a lot.

Personally I wouldn't have too many problems with that, but then I'm in England where there are many more atheists.

I mean, Christians are cool and all. After all, that's what my family is. But I feel like they're so narrow minded and have impossible standards. Even when I was a by-the-book Christian, I wasn't sure I could get to heaven being that it seemed like you had to be so perfect in order to get there. And I am -far- from perfect.

I hope you don't mind me saying that your experience of Christianity isn't the definition of it. There are many types of Christianity, many of which make the point that you don't earn your way to heaven by doing lots of good things to outweigh the bad. You are saved by the infinite love of God and this is seen in the person as a change in heart which tends to cause a change in action.

It can definitely seem like Christians have an impossible standard to attain, but another main the New Testament makes is freedom is Christ. Christianity is meant to be free and liberating, not tying yourself down to a cold hard law. Paul in fact says that the law is death, but the Spirit is life. This can be understood as living by the spirit of the law rather than the letter of the [moral] law.

Would God really forgive a person like me? Could I even live like I'm "supposed" to? Or am I too messed up to even bother with?

Of course. Paul persecuted Christians before he himself became one and much worse people have had their life changed.

Sometimes religion feels pointless to me. It just breeds hatred in most instances. Even amongst just different denominations.

True, but I also see hatred in politics.... does that mean democracy and civil law is wrong?

 

[salida]

First, no one is perfect-we are saved by grace. God excepts you with open arms but wants us to turn from sin and be separate from the world-this doesn't mean sinless but not practice sin. A relationship with Christ is never pointless.

Good works is a byproduct of saving faith-but works alone without faith is useless.

Are you a good person? www.livingwaters.com/good/

Did you ever get the holy spirit? He will give you the power to live a christian life. Human effort alone can't do this. Pray and you will get it. This will give you the inner strength to live the christian life.

1Jo 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

 

[Emmy]

Dear irrationality 72. You had some good replies, and here is mine, too. Jesus told a Lawyer in Matthew, chapter 22, verses 35-40: " The first and great Commandment is: Love God with all thy heart, with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. The second is like it: Love thy neighbour as thyself." Love is what God wants from us, selfless and beneficial. If you love all you know and all you meet, and if you treat them as you would love to be treated, with heart and hands, I don`t think it matters where you are. God is Love and God wants loving children/sons and daughters. God will see your sincere efforts to follow His Commandments, and God will approve and bless you. God will know that you love Him by following His Commandments to love. Jesus will give you His Love and Joy, and the Holy Spirit will give you His Love too. You will have plenty love to share all around you. Jesus told us: " Ask and ye will receive," we thank the Lord and carry on loving all others, whether friends or not friends. People will notice and mostly, will do the same to us. Love is a Christian`s only weapon, but it is all-powerful. Love will overcome all enmity and resist all missiles of the Evil One, God`s adversary. We might stumble often, but we then get up again, and keep on loving/fighting. We ask God`s Forgiveness, and God will forgive us as we forgive all who sin/transgress us. The Bible keeps telling us: " Repent," change our selfish and unloving character to: loving all around us, as we would love to be loved and treated. I say this with love. Greetings from Emmy, your sister in Christ.

 

[irrationality72]

wow, got a lot more feedback than I expected to get O_O but I will reply to all.

@drich0150: I don't even really understand the concept of being "unequally yoked." I mean, as long as each person respects the other and doesn't mock their beliefs or push said beliefs on each other, isn't that all that matters?

Touche about me having a narrow view of Christianity.

I might give Romans a read. I tend to stick to Psalms and Proverbs when I do actually read the Bible.

@secondtimearound: Nothing I haven't already heard before Yet if that is the case, I guess I'm still just wandering.

@AlexBP: Your response was the most logical to me. Can't disagree a bit.

@jehoiakim: I think I can't see the relationship aspect of it because all the religion is in the way and scares me off. I don't wanna be labeled as a Christian. I don't wanna be labeled at all. I just want to be and do my best in all things. And I wanna be free, not bound by all the traditions and expectations of a religion.

You made a few really good points in your last paragraph. I don't think, though, that I'll be trying to find a church anytime soon. I never feel like I belong in any church, and I've been to quite a few. Church has tended to be a bad experience for me.

@solarwave: Don't get me wrong, I know what Christianity is. Like you said, people are saved by the infinite love of God, which is exhibited through their change in heart and actions. I've been learning that for as long as I remember.

I guess what I was trying to say is I see so much hypocrisy in 90% of Christians. Like people who claim to feed the poor but are too proud to dirty their hands baking the bread for them, so to speak. I get tired of church gossip, people who sit there and talk badly of the people in/out of the church, judging them, when they are just as big of a mess themselves. It makes me both sad and angry. I've been on the receiving end of such judgment and I can honestly say it sucks. I've watched it for so long, and it's been in every church I've been to. I just wish that people would realize, that despite background or religion or income or education or race, we are all essentially the same. Gah, sorry. That was somewhat of a rant >_<

Oh, and I usually feel like Christianity (the traditions and expectations and so forth) is restrictive, not liberating. I guess living with my parents and the churches that I've been to have played a big part in making me feel that way.

@Salida: Don't disagree with you a bit.

@Emmy: Now -that- is awesome. Completely and totally. No complexities, just love in all you do.

I think I want Love to be my religion, haha.

 

[solarwave]

@solarwave: Don't get me wrong, I know what Christianity is. Like you said, people are saved by the infinite love of God, which is exhibited through their change in heart and actions. I've been learning that for as long as I remember.

Sorry for me assuming you didn't know then. There are some churches that don't teach such things.

I guess what I was trying to say is I see so much hypocrisy in 90% of Christians. Like people who claim to feed the poor but are too proud to dirty their hands baking the bread for them, so to speak. I get tired of church gossip, people who sit there and talk badly of the people in/out of the church, judging them, when they are just as big of a mess themselves. It makes me both sad and angry. I've been on the receiving end of such judgment and I can honestly say it sucks. I've watched it for so long, and it's been in every church I've been to. I just wish that people would realize, that despite background or religion or income or education or race, we are all essentially the same. Gah, sorry. That was somewhat of a rant >_<

It's a sad truth.

Oh, and I usually feel like Christianity (the traditions and expectations and so forth) is restrictive, not liberating. I guess living with my parents and the churches that I've been to have played a big part in making me feel that way.

Personally I would say the spirit of Christianity is more important than the institutions of it. The traditions and expectations can be restrictive, but there are different forms of Christianity, not just depending on church but the individuals in the church and their spiritual and general maturity.

 

[zaksmummy]

I grew up in christianity too, and my parents still have issues with the things I do - I think its a parent and child thing rather than a faith thing

I left church about 12 years ago because of the hypocrisy I saw, and that I felt I was too because I couldnt live like a good Christian. Since returning to faith 5 years ago Ive learned one thing - seek God first, everything else - me included comes second to that.

When I have sought God, he has directed me, and surprise, surprise the parents dont like it very much, but putting God first allows us to see his grace in action.

 

[elman]

First, no one is perfect-we are saved by grace. God excepts you with open arms but wants us to turn from sin and be separate from the world-this doesn't mean sinless but not practice sin. A relationship with Christ is never pointless.

Good works is a byproduct of saving faith-but works alone without faith is useless.

Are you a good person? www.livingwaters.com/good/

Did you ever get the holy spirit? He will give you the power to live a christian life. Human effort alone can't do this. Pray and you will get it. This will give you the inner strength to live the christian life.

1Jo 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

It is faith without love for others that is useless. 1 Cor 13:2