I am considering quitting my teaching job come December. The school I teach at is a private Christian school, though, and I know it'd be hard for them to find someone. I have two children and I am seeing the effect of my being gone on them. They cry and cling to me when I get home but on weekends they don't display this behavior. I honestly don't know what is right. I KNOW my school will be in a bad position if I quit midyear but I don't know for sure that there will be lasting damage on my children if I work until May. Teaching isn't like every other job and it's not common for teachers to leave in the middle of the year without special reason. My husband just received a promotion so this is the first time it's been financially feasible for me to stay home. I'm looking for prayer and perspective maybe even from a teacher. Thanks!
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Quit teaching midyear
- Thread starter Hannah1212
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- Jun 26, 2015
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If you feel comfortable answering, how old are your kids and who is caring for them when you are working?
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They are 18 months and 3. They go to preschool where I work three days and are with a sitter at home the other two. We don't have family near us.
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mina
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I used to teach ; for over 10 years. This was before I had children. When I was first pregnant ; I was teaching at a private church school. I became pregnant in the fall and was very stressed out with work and my administrator was having personal problems and took it out on staff collectively . Looking back, I wish I had quit mid year. I felt guilty about abandoning my students mid year and having them adjust to a new teacher. I stayed and finished out the year, professionally it was a good choice but personally I regret it. my baby was fine but pregnacy was extremely stressful. If I were in your situation , my children would come first. You never get those precious years back. If you don't have to work and want to be involved daily with your kids; do it and don't look back.
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Thank you for the response. I think you're right. When I think 5 years from now I don't think I'd ever regret quitting but I think I may regret staying.
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- Jun 26, 2015
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So because they are with two different caregivers you would notice if they were only unhappy on days when they stay home or days when at the school.
It's hard when they are as young as 18 mths to know why they are objecting. It's tricky when there is two. One may be fine with it if the other wasn't objecting, sibling sympathy and sticking together.
My grandson, who just turned two, had problems when he had to move this fall from the infant room to the older toddler room. It took him a few wks to get used to the new caregiver and older kids but he is fine now. He and another little boy just his age have become best buddies.
If you were my daughter I would say stay home with them if you can financially do so and maybe try to get the older one to go to preschool a couple days a week or even half days.
I realize that you made a commitment to the school so you may have to hang in there for awhile longer than you want to, but I don't know what you can do about that. You might be surprised though, the Lord may just have someone waiting in the wings to take your place right away.
I will pray for the Lord to guide you. God Bless you and your family.
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Kit Sigmon
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Welcome to this forum!
I have a few questions for you Hannah...
How long have you been teaching and how long have the children been
taken care of by separate people?
Prior to all this, what has been discussed between you and your husband, also, do you all plan on having any more children?
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I have worked the whole time I've had children. I started teaching 4 years ago. The different people watching them started this year. Up to this point I had to teach to get by financially but my husband and I always have wanted me to be home. We do want more children but not soon.
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Odetta
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I'm going to play devil's advocate, just so you have some things to think about that's not one-sided.
1) Separation issues are pretty normal for kids their ages. If you quit teaching because of that, the separation thing may just switch to another venue - dropping them off in the church nursery each Sunday, for instance, or date night.
2) You say you no longer need to work now that your husband has a better job, but what if that doesn't pan out? What if you have to go back to teaching? Will it look more professional to quit now, or wait until the end of the year? You will need to be able to give a compelling reason to a future employer for leaving your job mid-year. Is age-appropriate separation anxiety, or wanting to be home with my kids, compelling enough?
3) Yes it is very important to be an available parent and make the children God gave you a priority. However, our children should not the center of our universes. That's Jesus. What is Jesus calling you to do?
Now, of course, one woman's calling may be to not work so she can more fully focus on her children. Another woman's calling may be to work while also focusing on her children. And when a person is called to something, sometimes that something starts immediately, and sometimes it starts later as certain things need to be in place before the something can start.
As a mother of teens who has alternately worked and stayed home at different points in raising them, I can say that I highly doubt that your kids will be damaged if you wait 6 months to the end of the school year. It sounds to me like you are looking for justification to leave because you simply want to leave and be home with your kids, and you want it so much you want it to happen right away. You need to make sure that desire is from God, not from yourself.
From personal experience, I know that is not always easy to determine, so I feel for you. And I wrote all this not to convince you that you need to stay until the end of the school year, but to counter the premise I sometimes see in christian circles that a "good" christian mother doesn't work, period, if she doesn't have to. If God calls you to quit in December, how awesome and by all means do that. If God calls you to complete your commitment, he'll make sure it all works out.
I pray that God makes his will clear to you.
1) Separation issues are pretty normal for kids their ages. If you quit teaching because of that, the separation thing may just switch to another venue - dropping them off in the church nursery each Sunday, for instance, or date night.
2) You say you no longer need to work now that your husband has a better job, but what if that doesn't pan out? What if you have to go back to teaching? Will it look more professional to quit now, or wait until the end of the year? You will need to be able to give a compelling reason to a future employer for leaving your job mid-year. Is age-appropriate separation anxiety, or wanting to be home with my kids, compelling enough?
3) Yes it is very important to be an available parent and make the children God gave you a priority. However, our children should not the center of our universes. That's Jesus. What is Jesus calling you to do?
Now, of course, one woman's calling may be to not work so she can more fully focus on her children. Another woman's calling may be to work while also focusing on her children. And when a person is called to something, sometimes that something starts immediately, and sometimes it starts later as certain things need to be in place before the something can start.
As a mother of teens who has alternately worked and stayed home at different points in raising them, I can say that I highly doubt that your kids will be damaged if you wait 6 months to the end of the school year. It sounds to me like you are looking for justification to leave because you simply want to leave and be home with your kids, and you want it so much you want it to happen right away. You need to make sure that desire is from God, not from yourself.
From personal experience, I know that is not always easy to determine, so I feel for you. And I wrote all this not to convince you that you need to stay until the end of the school year, but to counter the premise I sometimes see in christian circles that a "good" christian mother doesn't work, period, if she doesn't have to. If God calls you to quit in December, how awesome and by all means do that. If God calls you to complete your commitment, he'll make sure it all works out.
I pray that God makes his will clear to you.
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DreamerOfTheHeart
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That is a terrible, almost impossible choice.
All I can say is I have seen my kids go through rough times when I put the Kingdom first. Even though they are the Kingdom. My wife likes to say the best way I can "save the world" is by simply spending time with them. And, she is right.
I can not say how much - since those times of sacrifice are over (at least for now) - spending time and chilling has been, both for me, and for them.
Leaving can be hard to do, but hopefully, trusting God to supply grace to those you leave is not.
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Do not feel guilty if you want to stay at home with your children! They are your first priority. However, something else concerns me. Call me paranoid but I am wondering what kind of care they are getting when you are away. It seems a little extreme that they would cling to you like that. Call me paranoid again but if it were me I would do some electronic snooping on the caregiver. Just a thought. Praying you are led in all the right ways.
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Kit Sigmon
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