Question concerning self injury

[spazlegs]

Okay, the self injury forum has a lot of folks in their whom it seems get triggered to hurt themselves pretty easily, and it is a help forum so asking these questions wouldn't be appropriate there.

When you self injure, is it because you have the need to feel something and you are in a place where you just can't feel anything?

When you self injure, is it because you feel like you need to punish yourself for real or imagined faults in yourself?

When you self injure, is it because the feelings of anger, misery or whatever else are so great that you need a distraction?

Are there other reasons you self injure?

I read something about a condition I may have, but haven't been diagnosed with and it made me think. One of the things that happens is that these folks do self injury too. I tried it once or twice, and the pain was of no use to me in making me feel better or distracting me from the garbage in my head. I used other addictive things to self medicate instead.

 

[bluelime2]

For the answers to your questions, I think it's probably best to read the self-injury forum and see what others say. Because that should probably answer what you're asking.
Not everyone will display the same text-book symptoms of an illness, so just because you arn't self-harming, doesn't mean you don't or do necessarily have the condition you might be concerned about.

Have you seen a professional about it?

 

[bubblefish]

As bluelime said, people self-injure for different reasons and no-one here can help with a diagnosis. I really would suggest talking to a professional. Most people will not show all conditions or symptoms of a disorder, but they may still be diagnosed. Often symptom lists are guidelines for therapists. You mentioned that you 'self-medicate'. Depending on definitions, that can sometimes be seen as a form of SI as well.

I haven't self-injured in quite a while now, but will attempt to answer your questions (warning - may trigger)

When you self injure, is it because you have the need to feel something and you are in a place where you just can't feel anything?
For me, it was usually to release pain. I was hurting inside and needed a way to get that out. The pain was all emotional and I felt that I needed something physical.

When you self injure, is it because you feel like you need to punish yourself for real or imagined faults in yourself?
At times I used it as a punishment, because I felt responsible for things in my past, however normally I was not thinking of my own faults or punishment but just of overwhelming pain that I needed to find a way to get rid of.

When you self injure, is it because the feelings of anger, misery or whatever else are so great that you need a distraction?
Yes, and a release. When I was harming I was able to live through the pain a bit longer. In my mind, I was in some way releasing part of the emotional pain that I had which allowed me to keep facing the world.

Are there other reasons you self injure?
I think I have covered most of it for me. Hope it helps, and I really hope that you find the support and answers you want.

 

[Mayflower1]

Okay, the self injury forum has a lot of folks in their whom it seems get triggered to hurt themselves pretty easily, and it is a help forum so asking these questions wouldn't be appropriate there.

When you self injure, is it because you have the need to feel something and you are in a place where you just can't feel anything?

I use to self-injure, and sometimes, it was because I felt numb, and it was to feel something. Other times, it was to numb myself because I didn't want to feel.

When you self injure, is it because you feel like you need to punish yourself for real or imagined faults in yourself?

all of it was nothing but Satan's lies. but it was for punishment. I saw myself as worthless, dumb, undeserving of good things. all lies. it was to punish myself when I made the slightest mistake, because I held unrealistic goals for myself. Praise God, not now!

When you self injure, is it because the feelings of anger, misery or whatever else are so great that you need a distraction?

Oh yes, definitely. these are still triggers sometimes, but I have learned how to feel, that it is okay to feel, and how to give it to God.

Are there other reasons you self injure?

use to I could point to the cuts/scars, look at them, and know this is what I was feeling, because I couldn't label what I was feeling and didn't know how to make it any better.



I read something about a condition I may have, but haven't been diagnosed with and it made me think. One of the things that happens is that these folks do self injury too. I tried it once or twice, and the pain was of no use to me in making me feel better or distracting me from the garbage in my head. I used other addictive things to self medicate instead.

these are actually good questions to ask about self-injury. where did you find them? I struggled with self-injury for 6 years, and my experience is it only causes more pain. Jesus Christ is the only one who could help us deal with our problems/emotions correctly. He saved my life, and freed me from so much misery and pain. God is just so good. He wants us to lean on Him.

answers in bold.

 

[mich_ellie]

I am pretty sure it depends on the person.
People do it to escape reality, to have control over something in their life, to hide emotional pain, and there can be many other reasons.

 

[Johnnz]

Most I know who struggled with self injury had experienced trauma of some sort.

John
NZ

 

[RuthD]

I used to self injure when I was in real bad emotional pain. That's just me.

 

[spazlegs]

Hi all, I didn't post in the self injury forum because those folks seem to be triggered to hurt themselves over a lot of things and I was concerned even asking the question could be a stumbling block.

What Johnnz said does seem to be true.

I have not been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder because I don't fit the profile well enough or severely enough. I have a co-morbidity of depression. I was abused and once read an article about how the abuse especially sustained abuse can modify the amygdala, the seat of the emotions to be hyper-reactive. BPD should I think actually be called emotional disregulation disorder or something like that. I didn't want to go in that forum because it didn't seem to helpful and I'm not diagnosed. I do have the abandonment issues and some emotional lability that is exaggerated by depression, but since that is well under control most of the time, the lability is much less. Plus I am mindful of how I feel most of the time and take a step back.\\

I don't want to tell too much else, because I've found that being too open even online can be a nasty thing.
There are lots of ways besides drugs or booze to give yourself pleasant feelings. And it is said that all that is required for a person to become addicted is to have a pulse. So, enough said about that.

 

[Johnnz]

If you can identify some bad events in your life and you have self injury issues getting some professional help would be wise.

John
NZ

 

[spazlegs]

Nah, I don't self injure. No burning, cutting, tatts or other body modifications here, Johnnz.

Though I did run to the bathroom once and started to pull my hair out literally so I didn't go kill my teen daughter! I was sitting in the corner having a meltdown, screaming I hate her, I hate her and pulling out my hair. My wife later told me she had to leave the room before she started to laugh. I'm laughing about it now, but it was sure real then.

Lily, I read some of the stuff on the borderlines and came up with the questions on my own. I was wondering the why of it.

 

[Criada]

In my case, the self injury stems from guilt and internal conflict.
It helps.. I don't really understand why, but it does temporarily stop the noise in my head.
Of course, afterwards, it just gives me something else to feel guilty about, so it's a vicious circle really.
But it did start with abuse, as seems to be the case for most people.