Pulled over for the first time

[QuentinL]

A day after my birthday and I get pulled over
I was driving back from Karate class and I had to take a route that went through the downtown area. I got a little lost and I accidentally made an "illegal lane change without signaling". My mirrors showed nobody behind me, the police car was in my blind spot. I went home and cried quite a bit because it depressed me so much and I felt very sorry.
I am torn between believing two things: 1) I feel like a guilty, bad person because the cop made me feel that way . Or 2) the cop is setting young people up (like me) because he has to keep his job and hand out so many warnings a month.

I don't know how to cope with this. I know time will heal me, but I'm still super depressed. :/

 

[Sophrosyne]

Not sure if the lane change was not allowed or you just forgot to signal but if you truly did wrong just pay your ticket and forgive yourself and move on as we all make mistakes and most are not worth getting bent out of shape over. I recall tickets I got from over 30 years ago that now they are nothing but a memory kind of like a bookmark stuck in an old book on a shelf in a dusty bookcase.

 

[David Sylvian]

A day after my birthday and I get pulled over
I was driving back from Karate class and I had to take a route that went through the downtown area. I got a little lost and I accidentally made an "illegal lane change without signaling". My mirrors showed nobody behind me, the police car was in my blind spot. I went home and cried quite a bit because it depressed me so much and I felt very sorry.
I am torn between believing two things: 1) I feel like a guilty, bad person because the cop made me feel that way . Or 2) the cop is setting young people up (like me) because he has to keep his job and hand out so many warnings a month.

I don't know how to cope with this. I know time will heal me, but I'm still super depressed. :/

Frankly, on the top ten list of who is likely to be a sociopath - sadly - cops are right on the list.

Traffic cops can be ruthless and way over enforce. I am sure some of those are sociopaths who do this for the power thrill.

Plenty of great cops out there, don't get me wrong. I work in a security field and have to deal with enforcing effectively meaningless rules at times. Thankfully, I usually can cut that red tape and absolutely hate that part of my job.

But I am quite sure a lot of people do not. I have had cops give me tickets on the stupidest things.

No way should you even remotely feel bad for such a thing. If anything feel bad for them. While they may be happy in their role, it is ultimately an extremely shallow thing to make themselves happy over.

OTOH, in at least one instance, I did have God have a cop get me on a very minor offense which ended up meaning I could no longer use that car. (Believe me, no good reason.) BUT, not being able to use that car turned out to be important for other purposes in my life.

So things can also be complicated.

 

[seashale76]

A day after my birthday and I get pulled over
I was driving back from Karate class and I had to take a route that went through the downtown area. I got a little lost and I accidentally made an "illegal lane change without signaling". My mirrors showed nobody behind me, the police car was in my blind spot. I went home and cried quite a bit because it depressed me so much and I felt very sorry.
I am torn between believing two things: 1) I feel like a guilty, bad person because the cop made me feel that way . Or 2) the cop is setting young people up (like me) because he has to keep his job and hand out so many warnings a month.

I don't know how to cope with this. I know time will heal me, but I'm still super depressed. :/

Ah- welcome- welcome! You are in exclusive company here. I have had more than my share of tickets over the years. I've been to traffic school three times. My first ticket- well I got two at once. It was from one of those neighborhood rent-a-cops and I still maintain those were the only two I didn't deserve. He also rode my blind spot. He was a nasty piece of work. The rest? I totally deserved all of them. I've never tried to talk my way out of a ticket. One cop let me go but yelled at me and made me cry. He was a truly nasty piece of work. Another cop let me go but didn't make me cry. The rest gave me tickets. I may have a tendency to speed- but at least I never ride bumpers, I always keep plenty of space between me and others, I'm not a distracted driver, I'm not an angry driver, and I follow all other traffic laws. The first time- especially- can be quite depressing what with traffic school looming over your head and having to pay. It happens sometimes. Sure- perhaps you deserved your tickets. But did you deserve to be treated like scum? No. However- what can you or I do about it?

I've taken to using cruise-control and haven't gotten a ticket since. There's something to think about doing.

 

[PaladinValer]

A day after my birthday and I get pulled over
I was driving back from Karate class and I had to take a route that went through the downtown area. I got a little lost and I accidentally made an "illegal lane change without signaling". My mirrors showed nobody behind me, the police car was in my blind spot. I went home and cried quite a bit because it depressed me so much and I felt very sorry.
I am torn between believing two things: 1) I feel like a guilty, bad person because the cop made me feel that way . Or 2) the cop is setting young people up (like me) because he has to keep his job and hand out so many warnings a month.

I don't know how to cope with this. I know time will heal me, but I'm still super depressed. :/

You made a mistake. You feel bad because you know you did; that's not a bad thing but a very good thing! It shows you have a pretty strong grounding in morality and conscience.

The cop was only doing his job; he wasn't "out to get you". That is the other mistake here; you've somewhat rationalized things and that is not good.

Accept you made a mistake. Accept the fact that the cop was only doing his job. You weren't any bit of a special target, and it was just shoddy luck that this happened to you so soon after your birthday; it was just a coincidence and a really sucky one.

If this bothers you so much, I suggest going to your pastor/priest and confess it. If he or she is worth his or her salt, he'll/she'll hear the confession, advise you, and pronounce His forgiveness.

 

[Vladyslaus Kyivarius]

Read some Bible verses, get that God is always willing to forgive people and pray a bit...Remember that we are not perfect.

But still cope with those rules in future. And rely on God so to sens cop's car presence.

God bless...

 

[Inkachu]

Dude, this is just a life lesson. Don't let it become some big, overwhelming drama. It's not. Thousands of perfectly decent people get ticketed every single day for the most minor infractions. All you can do is try to be conscious of using your signal in the future, and not let this make you feel like a horrible person (which you aren't). And pay your ticket

 

[Max Shade]

Yup, this is a no big.

I could tell you some fun stories though, if it'd make you feel better. . . .

. . . . Like the night I got pulled over, searched . . . twice in the same night and let off both times with nothing written by a cop. I was driving a fast car too. . .

Relax yo.

 

[saved24]

Feel for you. You didn't break the rules on purpose. Sorry the police man made you feel so bad, and so soon after your birthday too! hope you feel better about it soon, and you are not alone. I remember the first time I was pulled over. Someone suggested Bible verses, a good one is Romans 8:1 and always remember God loves you and He understands! God bless.

 

[forGod1]

A day after my birthday and I get pulled over
I was driving back from Karate class and I had to take a route that went through the downtown area. I got a little lost and I accidentally made an "illegal lane change without signaling". My mirrors showed nobody behind me, the police car was in my blind spot. I went home and cried quite a bit because it depressed me so much and I felt very sorry.
I am torn between believing two things: 1) I feel like a guilty, bad person because the cop made me feel that way . Or 2) the cop is setting young people up (like me) because he has to keep his job and hand out so many warnings a month.

I don't know how to cope with this. I know time will heal me, but I'm still super depressed. :/

you're depressed because you moved lanes before signaling.. be happy that you now have the reminder that might save your life one day. everything can be seen a blessing from God.. and isn't that, at the end of the day, everything you need?