Pretending to be happy

[Bain_Adaneth]

I'm not sure if you're being real, or being overly open. I would suggest not talking about your problems unless that's what you want people to remember you by. Except for the occasional bonding of "wow, wicked traffic."

People are basically caught up in balancing their own thoughts, their own days, and don't always take the time to hear about others' woes. That is not necessarily a problem on your end.

Sadly, I have found that when I need my friends the most, that's when I'm the least appealing to them. That's a good reminder to lean on God instead of people... then friendly compassion can be the icing on the cake.

Heron, those people are not your friends. You know God says that your brethen are the ones who gives you drink, feeds you and comes and visits you in prison....those are truely your friends.

 

[mont974x4]

Don't lie, but we do not have disclose all things. This is why I commented on using wisdom and tact in an earlier post. Most people do not need to know any details so an honest "I'm learning more everyday" or "I am waiting to see what God has in mind" or a similar statement is sufficient. With an intimate and trusted friend we can be more open.

we are not meant to be fake nor are we meant to be lone ranger Christians. We need to rebuild the community of believers so that we can be honest and we can truly help one another as we all grow in Christ.

 

[yanieh]

i'm not sure if i can fake happiness. i'm a very fun person and i have friends who are not so very fun. i'm the one making the effort to turn things light and joyful. and i would say i can manage to accomplish the task. if you're a not so very fun person, surround yourself with fun friends. there's a lot that our lives can offer to experience happiness in our daily living. the simplest things are the best things. you may not find happiness in youself but i'm sure you may find it in another person.

 

[GQ Chris]

I'm generally a positive person, but I would never get into that pseudo/humanistic/new age, overflowing to the brim happiness and just lose all perspective.

 

[Mr. Teeny]

Hey man, there's nothing like pumping weights and running an hour on the tread mill to boast your endorphins and have you tried walnuts, they're fantastic yeah!

 

[freeport]

i'm not sure if i can fake happiness. i'm a very fun person and i have friends who are not so very fun. i'm the one making the effort to turn things light and joyful. and i would say i can manage to accomplish the task. if you're a not so very fun person, surround yourself with fun friends. there's a lot that our lives can offer to experience happiness in our daily living. the simplest things are the best things. you may not find happiness in youself but i'm sure you may find it in another person.

That is interesting. I find different people have different dispositions. As Christians we are called to be tolerant and loving. So, one may be more fun then the rest, another more intelligent, another more hard working... but all contribute. And if it were not for the weaknesses of others, we really would not have anything special to contribute at all.

So one's lack fulfills one's gain, and vice versa.

 

[Michael Christopher]

Instead of pretending to be happy try to act happy even when you aren't. At the surface they sound like the same thing, but the difference is that you aren't putting up a facade to cover what is inside. You don't need to disconnect the two.

Act happy and let the person that you are on the inside absorb that. It's not about being fake it is about being lifted to joy.

Emotions lead to actions, that is true. What is also true but often overlooked is that actions lead to emotions. It's something that must be done on two levels: on the emotional and on the physical. The physical is the easiest to influence and it should not be overlooked. Smile, put your chin up, and put a spring in your step even if you don't feel it. Let what you are doing influence your emotions.

 

[imnuggz]

Positive thinking and visualization can only take you so far. you cannot just go be happy. Modern psychology would indicate that to get happy we should focus on our own thoughts and feelings, what we want, what we feel, what we think. Though I admit that I do not have a degree in psychology this type of thinking carries with it a terrible price. a generation of people that rather than living for something greater (God nation ECT) they live for themselves and their own self gratification. Now to the point rather than worry about weather on not you are happy just go be a Christian. Join a bible study, volunteer at the local school as a tutor, get a hobby, met new people, learn to play the violin. Just get involved with something and eventually you will suddenly find that you are happy. As far as telling people how you feel just make certain that the people you confide in are people that you can trust and it should work out well for you. I'll be praying for you, God bless

 

[InnocenceCannon]

I always loathed when I played football, and the whole premise of "manning up". I would literally not be able to move my arm after a big hit, and I would have to go right back to playing again, as the coach would get [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]ed at whining. Then I would fumble, and he would get mad anyways.

Pretty much what I'm getting from this is that, I just have to "man up". Pray, and even though I have lost all interest in life anymore, I need to magically find strength that doesn't exist, and keep going.


So I feel like I'm getting split answers here. For the record, is it better to "suck it up", and try to appear happy for the sake of others, or should I be more real, at the expense of friendships and my suffering possibly hindering my spiritual growth?

 

[TravisD]

You cannot magically find strength. If you cannot find strength within yourself, then your only option is through Christ. Pray everyday nonstop if you can for strength. You don't need to "man up". You need to "spirit Up" for the lack of a better term. Ask God to strengthen your spirit. Offer all your problems to Christ and let him deal with them. Don't struggle on your own, we are weak by ourselves. All the good friends in the world are nothing compared to Christ.

Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

2 Corinthians 12:9 but he has told me, "My grace is all you need, because my power is perfected in weakness." Therefore, I will most happily boast about my weaknesses, so that the Messiah's power may rest on me.

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Walk with Christ!

 

[janny108]

Positive thinking and visualization can only take you so far. you cannot just go be happy. Modern psychology would indicate that to get happy we should focus on our own thoughts and feelings, what we want, what we feel, what we think. Though I admit that I do not have a degree in psychology this type of thinking carries with it a terrible price. a generation of people that rather than living for something greater (God nation ECT) they live for themselves and their own self gratification. Now to the point rather than worry about weather on not you are happy just go be a Christian. Join a bible study, volunteer at the local school as a tutor, get a hobby, met new people, learn to play the violin. Just get involved with something and eventually you will suddenly find that you are happy. As far as telling people how you feel just make certain that the people you confide in are people that you can trust and it should work out well for you. I'll be praying for you, God bless

I agree and I need to get involved. I mean I am to some extent: I'm a greeter and work with kids 1x a month. I don't have a job now so I'd meet more ppl that way. I'm looking into volunteering somewhere, maybe getting some other type of fellowship in another church too.