Pre-marital Counseling

[Wide-eyedWithWonder]

Have any of y'all done pre-marital counseling? If you have, I'd like to know how it benefited your marriage. Thanks!!

 

[GREG]

I didnt but wished I did........... If you have that oppotunity to do so, do it.
not just for you but for your husband and your future.

 

[hollygirl]

We did it. I highly recommend it. Like Pray4Isrel said, it helps ya work out issues that you never even thought about before.

 

[Miyu]

I did...and now I am divorced...

despite that, I would still recommend it.

 

[conceived in fire]

i dont think very highly of counseling of any sort...i've never seen it help much.

 

[Exodus]

What would happen if one of them discovers their lack of attraction to the other during pre-marital counselling?

Most people don't seek pre-marital counselling, and a lot of things are not communicated openly. When the issues arise in marriage, it becomes more devastating.

But my question is, is honesty really the best policy? Or should people slide differences by pre-marriage in the interest of the other's feelings?

 

[Wide-eyedWithWonder]

  Thanks y'all!  I'm definitely planning to get counseling (when I need it! lol). 

 

[Cindy]

Exodus: I think tactfully put, honesty is a very good policy. That said, I am considering what premarital counseling will mean for my partner and I, and I am almost scared of the of the issues that might come up. Did anybody who had p-m counseling encounter anything unexpected, or did anything that was raised drastically change your view of the relationship? Or does it simply clarify certain points?

 

Sorry if this doesn't make any sense!

 

[OracleX]

We went through premarital counseling and did benifit from it. My view on premarital counseling is that it should be a check and balence to make sure things are in place, NOT as a last chance effort to fix missing elements in a relationship. Too many times that is what it turns out too be, and I include myself in that bracket of people.

I honestly believe that people should take very careful stock of their relationships BEFORE they get engaged, NOT after. If needed, then seek the counsel of your pastor to help you two with this BEFORE you get engaged. At which point you may see things that you need to work on before the life long commitment is made.

 

[Elizabeth Gray]

We had pre-marital counseling and it didn't do a thing. Mostly because the assistant pastor who did it was a flake and didn't really invest much time or thought into it, and he wasn't married either!! He just had us do a workbook and then lightly discuss it. We learned a few things about each other, but other than that, it didn't help. (Needless to say, the assistant pastor was fired a few months later for stealing from the youth fund!!!)

I do, however, recommend pre-marital counseling for everyone. As long as you don't get someone who's married and has good standing in the church, I think it is extremely beneficial. At least it doesn't hurt!!