Prayers for Suicides

[Lirenel]

I looked back on some threads, but never found a thread with an answer. Are there any prayers specifically said for the souls of someone who committed suicide? I have prayers for the dead, but knowing the Church's stand on suicide, I was hoping there might be a prayer specifically for suicides.

I ask, because about two years ago, a guy I have known since kindergarten died. I don't know for sure if it was suicide, but since no one really talked about how he died (and in a small town like we're from, everyone usually knows everything) I have assumed he committed suicide.

In fact, the...I guess you could call it the demon of suicide seems to always be close to me (though, thank God, never really touching me personally). Two or three months after by friend died, a high school friend of my roommate committed suicide. This would be the same roommate who, our freshman year of college, literally wrote a suicide note while I was sleeping across the room and considered jumping out a third-story window before waking me up and together we got our RA and got my roommate to the health center. Even recently my grandmother (whom I am living with at the moment) was suffering from severe depression and basically told me that if she didn't love her children and grandchildren so much and didn't have her faith in God she would see no reason to live.

One of the reasons I really started looking into Orthodoxy was my friend's death - I wanted to be able to pray for him, even though he was dead, and Orthodoxy encourages prayer for the dead. I'm just hoping someone knows a specific prayer I can say for my friend and others who have committed suicide.

 

[ProScribe]

I don't know why people commit suicide.

It must a serious psychological problem related to clinical depression.

 

[narnia59]

There are few experiences as difficult to heal from as having a loved one commit suicide.

I don't have a specific prayer, but I've always found the story of the paralytic whose friends cut through the roof to get him to Jesus very helpful when dealing with suicide. Are not those who have made this decision paralyzed by life, and on their own cannot find their way? In the Gospel story Jesus tells the man his sins have been forgiven due to the faith of his friends.


Mark 2:
1 And when he returned to Caper'na-um after some days, it was reported that he was at home. 2 And many were gathered together, so that there was no longer room for them, not even about the door; and he was preaching the word to them. 3 And they came, bringing to him a paralytic carried by four men. 4 And when they could not get near him because of the crowd, they removed the roof above him; and when they had made an opening, they let down the pallet on which the paralytic lay. 5 And when Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralytic, "My son, your sins are forgiven."


I always tell people to understand we can be the stretcher bearers for those who have committed suicide and by our faith bring them to the feet of Christ. The only prayer we really need is "Lord have mercy". I find it very comforting to know our faith can have such an impact when others are weak and in need.

 

[Dorothea]

Here's what info I could find:

The Optina Elder Leonid told of one of his disciples whose father committed suicide. In his overwhelming grief the son turned to the Elder for consolation. The Elder replied, "Entrust both yourself and the lot of your father to the all-wise, omnipotent will of the Lord. Do not seek miracles of the Most High. Strive by humble-mindedness to strengthen yourself within the bounds of tempered sorrow. Pray to the Most-good Creator, thus fulfilling the duty of love and the obligation of a son. You ought not to sorrow beyond measure. God loved and loves him incomparably more than you. And so it remains for you to entrust the eternal lot of your father to the goodness and compassion of God, Who if He is well-pleased to show mercy, then who can oppose Him?"

The following is a model of a private prayer which might be said for a non-Orthodox person as suggested by the Elder Leonid, one who was experienced in the spiritual life:

Have mercy, O Lord, if it is possible, on the soul of Thy servant (name), departed to eternal life in separation from Thy Holy Orthodox Church! Unsearchable are Thy judgments. Account not this my prayer as sin. But may Thy holy will be done!

MYSTAGOGY: On Prayer For Those Who Commit Suicide and For the Departed Non-Orthodox

 

[Lirenel]

Thank you all for your responses!

The following is a model of a private prayer which might be said for a non-Orthodox person as suggested by the Elder Leonid, one who was experienced in the spiritual life:

Have mercy, O Lord, if it is possible, on the soul of Thy servant (name), departed to eternal life in separation from Thy Holy Orthodox Church! Unsearchable are Thy judgments. Account not this my prayer as sin. But may Thy holy will be done!

^I think this is exactly what I was looking for. Simple, but profound. Especially since I know my friend who committed suicide was never, in life, part of the Orthodox church.

And narnia59, thank you for the Bible verses and the thoughts that went with them. I hadn't thought of considering a person who committed suicide as paralyzed, but I can definitely see the connection now.

 

[Anhelyna]

My very personal view is that we do not know if the person who took their own life was ill or not .

In many ways it takes an act of courage to take your own life , and we really do not know what drives anyone to that act.


Therefore I ask for mercy for them , by using the Jesus Prayer and inserting that person's name .

 

[Dorothea]

Thank you all for your responses!



^I think this is exactly what I was looking for. Simple, but profound. Especially since I know my friend who committed suicide was never, in life, part of the Orthodox church.

Glad I could help.

 

[Lirenel]

Sadly, I had need of looking up this thread again. Yesterday, the grandmother I mentioned before as suffering from depression was found having finally given in to that depression by overdosing on pills. The whole family is grief-stricken; my mom and her brother are now driving up together to help my grandfather and my aunt. I'm staying with my dad who is recovering from hernia surgery.

So thank you again for this thread. And please pray for the soul of my grandmother, Jean.

 

[Lukaris]

Lord, have mercy on you all!

 

[buzuxi02]

Lirenel,

They're was a couple of threads on Monachos.net about this. Search there, they have good advice. Suicide is tough. I lost one of my best friends a few years ago by suicide. And he wasnt mentally ill, but got involved with nefarious business with even more nefarious business partners.

As the priest told us l, we have to pray for his soul because he can't anymore.

 

[ArmyMatt]

Lord have mercy!

 

[E.C.]

A classmate of mine in high school who in hindsight was one of the driving forces behind my returning to the Christian faith committed suicide two years after we graduated.
Whenever I'm home I make the cemetery rounds and visit her grave. Her name is one of the few that is permanently in my prayers.

A monastery abbot and a few priests have said that we should include suicides in our private prayers because 1) we don't know what drove them to it and 2) they need our prayers the most.

 

[Lirenel]

Lirenel,

They're was a couple of threads on Monachos.net about this. Search there, they have good advice. Suicide is tough. I lost one of my best friends a few years ago by suicide. And he wasnt mentally ill, but got involved with nefarious business with even more nefarious business partners.

As the priest told us l, we have to pray for his soul because he can't anymore.

I haven't been on Monachos.net for awhile, thanks for the suggestion! And thank you all for your support and prayers.

 

[Dorothea]

Sadly, I had need of looking up this thread again. Yesterday, the grandmother I mentioned before as suffering from depression was found having finally given in to that depression by overdosing on pills. The whole family is grief-stricken; my mom and her brother are now driving up together to help my grandfather and my aunt. I'm staying with my dad who is recovering from hernia surgery.

So thank you again for this thread. And please pray for the soul of my grandmother, Jean.

Lord, have mercy! I'm so sorry, Lirenel. God's comfort, strength and peace to you and your family. May her memory be eternal.

 

[tapi]

Lord have mercy on you servant!

 

[Pathetic ascetic]

I didn't see it mentioned, in the Akathist to the Departed there's a section containing the following prayer:

"Save those who have committed suicide in the darkness of
their mind,

that the flame of their sinfulness may be extinguished in the
ocean of Thy grace.

O Lord of unutterable Love, remember Thy servants who
have fallen asleep. "

My sister-in-law took her own life at 25. Needless to say, I've prayed this often.

 

[ArmyMatt]

I forget who, but there is an akathist to a saint who is known for interceding for suicides and those who die outside of the Church.