My depression has come back. I’m having thoughts of wishing I could die. I hate the life I have. I am in constant pain. Either emotional or physically, with only a few moments of peace. My anger toward God has pretty much become hatred. I’ve contemplated suicide but I think of my mom and how that would destroy her. She the only reason I have any motivation to keep on living. I feel like a prisoner in this life. I am here against my will.