Praise Report My Mom

[Avniel]

So I took some of your advice guys and I have to say it actually is working. I have very little contact with my mother, I will facetime her to talk to the baby, I will call and check on her, answer her calls and speak to her briefly but I limit it to 5 mins but I text her more then anything. I do one call every two weeks....when she goes negative I just talk about the baby then I get off the phone.

I tried the boundaries thing it didn't work now I am trying the limited contact and it is working like a charm. I think it's working so well because she doesn't know it's limited.

I feel good, less negative, less stressful, more enjoyment, I don't think about my past or childhood.

I feel like this takes away my bitterness because I don't deal with the same person because I am out before that person shows up. I think this method is helping me heal more.

God is good.

 

[LoveConquers]

So I took some of your advice guys and I have to say it actually is working. I have very little contact with my mother, I will facetime her to talk to the baby, I will call and check on her, answer her calls and speak to her briefly but I limit it to 5 mins but I text her more then anything. I do one call every two weeks....when she goes negative I just talk about the baby then I get off the phone.

I tried the boundaries thing it didn't work now I am trying the limited contact and it is working like a charm. I think it's working so well because she doesn't know it's limited.

I feel good, less negative, less stressful, more enjoyment, I don't think about my past or childhood.

I feel like this takes away my bitterness because I don't deal with the same person because I am out before that person shows up. I think this method is helping me heal more.

God is good.

Glad to hear things are lookin up!! Thanks for sharing, always great to hear good news updates!

 

[Hetta]

That's great news Avniel. Good for you.

 

[seeingeyes]

So I took some of your advice guys and I have to say it actually is working. I have very little contact with my mother, I will facetime her to talk to the baby, I will call and check on her, answer her calls and speak to her briefly but I limit it to 5 mins but I text her more then anything. I do one call every two weeks....when she goes negative I just talk about the baby then I get off the phone.

I tried the boundaries thing it didn't work now I am trying the limited contact and it is working like a charm. I think it's working so well because she doesn't know it's limited.

I feel good, less negative, less stressful, more enjoyment, I don't think about my past or childhood.

I feel like this takes away my bitterness because I don't deal with the same person because I am out before that person shows up. I think this method is helping me heal more.

God is good.

The "boundaries thing" is the "limited contact thing", it's just that the boundary that works for you now (and for the forseeable future) is limited contact.

You're doing great!

 

[Avniel]

The "boundaries thing" is the "limited contact thing", it's just that the boundary that works for you now (and for the forseeable future) is limited contact.

You're doing great!

Yeah, you are right. I think it's working because she doesn't know like she has boundaries. It's just I know she has boundaries and that can feel empowering. She has the type of personality when you ask her "please don't" or anything that is setting up boundaries is almost like a challenge to her.

 

[seeingeyes]

Yeah, you are right. I think it's working because she doesn't know like she has boundaries. It's just I know she has boundaries and that can feel empowering. She has the type of personality when you ask her "please don't" or anything that is setting up boundaries is almost like a challenge to her.

Yep. I know exactly what you mean. Sometimes it's better to quit asking for permits and just build the damn fence.

 

[Avniel]

Yep. I know exactly what you mean. Sometimes it's better to quit asking for permits and just build the damn fence.

I am actually stealing that......and I am going to pretend I made it up.

 

[seeingeyes]

I am actually stealing that......and I am going to pretend I made it up.

Go for it, bro.

(The lawyer prints out 14 copies of this thread "just in case". )

 

[Hetta]

Yep. I know exactly what you mean. Sometimes it's better to quit asking for permits and just build the damn fence.

I love that too.

 

[sdmsanjose]

Originally Posted by Avniel http://www.christianforums.com/t7807768/#post65107308

I feel good, less negative, less stressful, more enjoyment, I don't think about my past or childhood.

I feel like this takes away my bitterness because I don't deal with the same person because I am out before that person shows up. I think this method is helping me heal more.

God is good.

What you wrote above is very important and encouraging!!!
Even if you and I disagree sometimes I think you are a good man!

Thanks for your uplifting post Avniel!


PS
Keep building that fence and address the permit later only if it will help you.

 

[mkgal1]

Great phrase, SeeingEyes! I love that, too.

Boundaries (properly executed boundaries) are really just following Paul's instruction of, "If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all." For some people that needs to be either in very limited and almost superficial ties to simply praying for their well being (and NOT seeing them at all) in order for there to be "peace".

Good for you (and your family) Avniel. Boundaries preserve our love for others....and protect them from the destruction that selfishness and pride can destroy (like you're experiencing).