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Portraying Without Error

SashaDusty

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Jan 31, 2012
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In my fictional work, a girl lives in a dystopian society lorded over by leaders who are supposedly Christians.

In this society, there are strict laws that the Faithful (citizens) have to go to a church service once every day, woman are below men and must wear modest dresses, security cameras are in every house, slave labor is considered the Lord's will, etc etc. It is ruled by leaders called head Patriarchs, with lower Patriarchs lording over individual towns, and familial Patriarchs over individual familes (i.e. husbands/fathers). Only head and lower Patriarchs may use any technology. To disobey a Patriarch, fall behind in church/work or break a rule is to become a Lost Sheep. Lost Sheep are removed from their families and placed in the home of a lower Patriarch to work, work, work and pray, pray, pray until they've earned the forgiveness of the Patriarch, and supposedly thereby earning God's forgiveness.

To become rebellious entirely or break one too many rules is to become a Witch. (Also Witches are those who were never part of the society to begin with...but there aren't many of those since most were wiped out hundreds of years back). Low scale Witches are placed in an Asylum to be painfully Converted into/back into being a Faithful. Higer scale Witches are executed by burning in front of a congregation of Patriarchs.

Obviously, it seems like my book has a negative view of a Christian society. But I don't want it to be thought of in that way. I want to portray a "Christian" society gone wrong, and to illustrate that the evil way the Patriarchs operate is not Christian at all. In fact, I want the book to have some underlying themes that show that real Christianity is accepting and kind, not totalitarian.

How can I make sure not to offend other Christians in the way I portray this society?
 

BleedingHeart

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In my fictional work, a girl lives in a dystopian society lorded over by leaders who are supposedly Christians.

In this society, there are strict laws that the Faithful (citizens) have to go to a church service once every day, woman are below men and must wear modest dresses, security cameras are in every house, slave labor is considered the Lord's will, etc etc. It is ruled by leaders called head Patriarchs, with lower Patriarchs lording over individual towns, and familial Patriarchs over individual familes (i.e. husbands/fathers). Only head and lower Patriarchs may use any technology. To disobey a Patriarch, fall behind in church/work or break a rule is to become a Lost Sheep. Lost Sheep are removed from their families and placed in the home of a lower Patriarch to work, work, work and pray, pray, pray until they've earned the forgiveness of the Patriarch, and supposedly thereby earning God's forgiveness.

To become rebellious entirely or break one too many rules is to become a Witch. (Also Witches are those who were never part of the society to begin with...but there aren't many of those since most were wiped out hundreds of years back). Low scale Witches are placed in an Asylum to be painfully Converted into/back into being a Faithful. Higer scale Witches are executed by burning in front of a congregation of Patriarchs.

Obviously, it seems like my book has a negative view of a Christian society. But I don't want it to be thought of in that way. I want to portray a "Christian" society gone wrong, and to illustrate that the evil way the Patriarchs operate is not Christian at all. In fact, I want the book to have some underlying themes that show that real Christianity is accepting and kind, not totalitarian.

How can I make sure not to offend other Christians in the way I portray this society?

You probably won't. Christians of most stripes disfavor gov't or churches that mandate every aspect of their lives. Free will and that sort of thing, right? As long as your protagonist is Christian you won't have much of a problem.
 
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