Poetic Works

[julez]

No Longer

i dont have to be
lonely no more
my heart is no longer
black to the core

i dont have to be
unloved any more
my heart is no longer
bruised and sore

i am no longer scared
of what the future might hold
i am moving ahead in life
my heart is no longer cold

my mind is no longer
cluttered with hate
you've clensed my soul
and shown me my fate

wow i love this one, its sort of like the stuff i write! keep up the good work!

 

[SimplyUnique]

thx julez!

 

[SimplyUnique]

Pitch Black Night

Day slowly fades
Into the pitch-black night
Till all you see is darkness
And all you feel is fright

The night begins to surround
Like a dark cold sheet
Where your feeling frozen
From your head down to your feet

You hear the silent footsteps
Of the demons of the dark
You hear the silent cries
In your brain they leave a mark

The creepiness they emit
Is one above them all
But do not let them win
They will push you till you fall

So ward them off with hatred
That will send them fleeing
It will bash there minds
And keep them from seeing

Seeing where their going
But they still see there faults
Let them destroy themselves
Let them destroy their cults

 

[SimplyUnique]

bump

 

[BohemianChris]

wow i love this one, its sort of like the stuff i write! keep up the good work!

I disagree. Her poetry is banal and zealously ordinary. Your poetry reads like prose for lack of rhythm and content.

Best,
Chris

 

[SimplyUnique]

I disagree. Her poetry is banal and zealously ordinary. Your poetry reads like prose for lack of rhythm and content.

Best,
Chris

oh really? and how would you know?

 

[SimplyUnique]

Beauty from Pain



All my hurt and pain

Will wash away

But all my happy memories

Will forever stay



From all the pain I’ve experienced

Will come great beauty

My haunting memories will be bear

Like nudity



The great beauty will become

The thing that shines

All my loss and tears

Will be left behind



Beauty from pain

That’s what it will be

I will be so pretty and happy

Just you wait and see





I Chose Him Over Her



Through my many tears

I see the approaching dawn

I see the sun come up

And over the front lawn



I hear the birds chirp

In the trees nearby

I hear the planes over head

As they fly by



I feel the wind blow

Through the window in my room

I know that I will be out there

So very soon



I get out of bed
And put on my clothes

I cover up the scars with bracelets

So nobody knows



I make my way outside
And down the empty street

There is no one around

No one to meet



On this lonely walk

I think of many things

Of what I am to do
And what this life brings



I think of him

And the times we shared

I think of her

And how she cared



I realize that he was there all along

And she was always away

That’s why I’m happy

I chose him to stay



I’m happy that he’s the one
I chose to stand by

And now he’s the only one

That can make my heart fly



Life’s Experiences



I’ve been down to the bottom and back

I’ve experienced great loss and pain

I’ve swam in the coldest lake

And danced in the rain



I’ve felt the truest love of all

And to this day I still do

I’ve stayed awake till dawn

I’ve felt the morning dew



I’ve made so many friends

And lost some also

I’ve found a star fish

And dug up a fossil



I’ve had so many experiences in life

Almost to many it goes to high

Now all I have left to do

Is fly with the stars in the sky

 

[luv4godremains]

I disagree. Her poetry is banal and zealously ordinary. Your poetry reads like prose for lack of rhythm and content.

Best,
Chris

I think that was pretty mean and rude, I know there is such thing as a presonal opinion, but just because that's what you think doesn't mean that's what everyone think or has to think! I really like her work! and, maybe her work is intended to be like that!? even if it isn't, you should appreciate it for what it is! I really like it and thank you for sharing it with everyone!

 

[TheRedFox]

I think that was pretty mean and rude, I know there is such thing as a presonal opinion, but just because that's what you think doesn't mean that's what everyone think or has to think! I really like her work! and, maybe her work is intended to be like that!? even if it isn't, you should appreciate it for what it is! I really like it and thank you for sharing it with everyone!

It is very important to pay close attention to every ctitique given, with an open-mind. Every piece of art gives different feelings to different people; half the point of art is to learn to control either the production of certain feelings or to promote a variety. Expressing yourself doesn't give you a ticket to acceptance, it permits you but a key to the door of recognition.

<3

 

[SimplyUnique]

I think that was pretty mean and rude, I know there is such thing as a presonal opinion, but just because that's what you think doesn't mean that's what everyone think or has to think! I really like her work! and, maybe her work is intended to be like that!? even if it isn't, you should appreciate it for what it is! I really like it and thank you for sharing it with everyone!

thanks for sticking up for me

 

[luv4godremains]

lol, it's k.

TheRedFox, I understand what you are sayng, but he should maybe have voiced his opinions in a gentler way! I get very over protective when people say things like that plainly from bad experiences. I don't mean to be soo, I dunno, moody about it, but I do feel like Chris should have been more gentle!

 

[Hisbygrace]

Distant Dreamer do not let anyone's opinion discourage you. You are only 13 and your poetry is very promising. It reflects your thoughts and emotions and sends a message about you. Keep up the good work, but always remember that whatever we do there is always room for improvment.

 

[BohemianChris]

I think that was pretty mean and rude, I know there is such thing as a presonal opinion, but just because that's what you think doesn't mean that's what everyone think or has to think! I really like her work! and, maybe her work is intended to be like that!? even if it isn't, you should appreciate it for what it is! I really like it and thank you for sharing it with everyone!

I'm sorry you're ordinary too.

Best,
Chris

 

[TheRedFox]

lol, it's k.

TheRedFox, I understand what you are sayng, but he should maybe have voiced his opinions in a gentler way! I get very over protective when people say things like that plainly from bad experiences. I don't mean to be soo, I dunno, moody about it, but I do feel like Chris should have been more gentle!

In actuality, a romanticist is a man disconnected with reality, rather than a man of sanguinity.

I know that you were brandishing your sword in effort to protect someone who may have been in peril, but you have to realize that those to weak to take criticism need a lot more than a few words of defense. What you have done is given them a reason to feel proud, that is not a good thing. For them to have felt safe, you would have tried to coax their unopened mind to seeing beyond that which is safe into the world that is full of ponies as well as scorpions.

No one has to mellow out their harshness, their own perceptions, but it would be nice. Let freedom reign, and accept that before desert comes dinner - it’s all about how you stomach it.

<3

 

[SimplyUnique]

Distant Dreamer do not let anyone's opinion discourage you. You are only 13 and your poetry is very promising. It reflects your thoughts and emotions and sends a message about you. Keep up the good work, but always remember that whatever we do there is always room for improvment.

Thank you very much. I just wish I had a place to publish it

 

[luv4godremains]

TheRedFox,
bear in mind that *Distant*Dreamer* is 13, she has much time to grow in her works, and saying things that way could have just discouraged her from what she does, there are ways in which to say things that would not do that but wouls still get his point across!

 

[TheRedFox]

TheRedFox,
bear in mind that *Distant*Dreamer* is 13, she has much time to grow in her works, and saying things that way could have just discouraged her from what she does, there are ways in which to say things that would not do that but wouls still get his point across!

Don't teach them that there are always hands to hold on to and people to hide behind, because the truth is that there wont always be. Teach them to be strong, to stomach the vile toxins slipped into our drinks when we are all alone and utterly taken by surprise.

<3

 

[SimplyUnique]

yeah well it did discourage me until someoen else told me i was good

 

[TheRedFox]

yeah well it did discourage me until someoen else told me i was good

Not everyone will always think you're good, remember that. Vincent van Gogh was a genius, but he was not accepted until his unfortunate death - imagine that.

I wont repeat myself anymore, mon ami. Since I doubt that you have shed even a glance at all that I have been pouring out to you from my heart, I am going to take my time elsewhere.
Goodluck.

<3

 

[SimplyUnique]

no i know that people will not always telling me i'm good, but the way he said it was realy rude and mean