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Please help me...

Beloved Alle

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Hello... I’m currently in a state of spiritual weakness, and i feel very condemned and cursed because of what i had done three years ago.

back then i had wrongly believed that God wasnt real and that i had to play God to save people. i abandoned my faith to depend on a human for hope during a time of depression, but was doubly hurt when he betrayed me ><

Motivated by the idea that consequences could correct him, i took to the internet and searched for the consequences of his sins. I also used those with Christian references because i thought using God’s authority would help him take things more seriously.

i would share these consequences (which talked about curses, death and hell) with him which only ended up turning him and the other girl he was going out with, away from God.

Later God told me to bring them back to Him using bible verses and sermon cds but i felt too inadequate, afraid, or jealous (i didnt want them to be blessed as i felt that their happiness was built on my pain and misery as the guy was using me emotionally and manipulating me) and did not do as God told me to do.

The guy and girl had also turned to the occult and given their souls to the devil and were sending demons to attack and harm/destroy us everyday. The more i used God’s word against them the angrier they got and began attacking my family too after they could not destroy me.

God had given me chances to bring them back to Him, but i found it hard to. I once asked God how He would bring them back to Him on His own and the word ‘destroy’ stood out to me many times before the words ‘bring back’ stood out too.

Recently i have been noticing signs and omens relating to my family members’ birthyears, as well as mine, the number 4, bad words like ‘death’ ‘hell’ ‘mar’ ‘gore’ and i worry that God is losing His patience and that if i still do not bring the guy and girl back to Him that He is going to use the guy and girl who are under the influence of the devil, to destroy my family and i, before bringing the guy and girl back to Himself.

i feel very upset and hurt, even antagonistic towards God after all these things.

yet i am also struggling spiritually as after i had left God three years ago, and rejected Him and Jesus several times because i didnt understand their importance, the demons that the guy sent to attack me entered me and i began hearing from these demons. i can no longer hear clearly from God anymore ><
 

Amittai

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While we pray simply, and you pray simply, chunk down the task you thought of undertaking, but hesitated from, towards these two, into very small steps, and dare to do it only a small bit at a time. Our Father said for all three of you. It's good to be sensitive to warning "vibes" ahead of time, so that all is not lost yet (without reference to overt "outcomes" of course).
 
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paul1149

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if i still do not bring the guy and girl back to Him that He is going to use the guy and girl who are under the influence of the devil, to destroy my family and i, before bringing the guy and girl back to Himself.

i feel very upset and hurt, even antagonistic towards God after all these things.
God gives everyone free will. You cannot make anyone come back to God. This issue is driving a wedge between you and God, and that is the worst possible outcome. I would suggest placing all these issues aside and come to Jesus as a simple child. Loose yourself from all the stress and the pressure. Jesus said we can do nothing without Him, and in Jn 15 the key to answered prayer in to abide in Him. James 3 tells us that heavenly wisdom is accompanied by peace and reasonableness. Come apart from your striving and rest awhile in the Lord, and let seasons of refreshing come upon you.
 
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Beloved Alle

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God gives everyone free will. You cannot make anyone come back to God. This issue is driving a wedge between you and God, and that is the worst possible outcome. I would suggest placing all these issues aside and come to Jesus as a simple child. Loose yourself from all the stress and the pressure. Jesus said we can do nothing without Him, and in Jn 15 the key to answered prayer in to abide in Him. James 3 tells us that heavenly wisdom is accompanied by peace and reasonableness. Come apart from your striving and rest awhile in the Lord, and let seasons of refreshing come upon you.

i think that i had used the law against them and made it seem like God hated them when it was me who was angry and misused God’s name and word against them ><

God wanted me to message them bible verses to turn them back to Him or give them things like sermons speaking of Jesus and God’s love for them as a Father but i always gave into my feelings of unworthiness, fears or flesh (cos i was in pain and hurting because of their actions and found it hard to do anything good to help or bless them ><)

but im worried that if i don’t bring them back to God, that the natural consequences would be that they, under the influence of the evil one, and as ‘666’, having turned away from God, would end up killing my family as they have been using demonic means to attack my family and me :/

I’m afraid that God would make me learn my lesson and suffer from these consequences by not choosing to save my non-Christian family members ><
 
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Beloved Alle

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While we pray simply, and you pray simply, chunk down the task you thought of undertaking, but hesitated from, towards these two, into very small steps, and dare to do it only a small bit at a time. Our Father said for all three of you. It's good to be sensitive to warning "vibes" ahead of time, so that all is not lost yet (without reference to overt "outcomes" of course).

Um may I know if you’re able to hear from God..?
 
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paul1149

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i always gave into my feelings of unworthiness, fears or flesh (cos i was in pain and hurting because of their actions and found it hard to do anything good to help or bless them ><)

but im worried that if i don’t bring them back to God...

I’m afraid that God would make me learn my lesson and suffer from these consequences...
You're focused on yourself and your failures, and your concept of God is that He is a stern taskmaster just waiting to catch you in a fault and then punish you. Were that true, why would God bother to send Jesus to die on a cross for us? You need to understand that we come to Christ because we cannot do this on our own. We don't accept salvation and then are left alone to do the best we can, and when we blow it, watch out. At salvation the Holy Spirit joins with our spirit in covenant relationship and HE begins to do the work of God within us. Nothing good is going to happen without this transformation of the inner man, and the best thing you can do is surrender to the process and begin cooperating with it, and to stop trying to do it yourself. Focusing on past failures or current circumstances or malignant fears is a destructive distraction from what's important, from the only thing that can actually change you and your situation.
 
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Bobber

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yet i am also struggling spiritually as after i had left God three years ago, and rejected Him and Jesus several times because i didnt understand their importance, the demons that the guy sent to attack me entered me and i began hearing from these demons. i can no longer hear clearly from God anymore ><

I'd say you need to establish your prayer, worship and praise and filling you're spirit and mind with feeding on God's word even for a couple of hours a day. If you consider that's too much always remember the average person 3 hours and 43 mintues a day on TV or devises.

The average U.S. adult will spend three hours and 43 minutes a day on mobile devices this year

You spend this much time filling yourself with God's presence and word just watch what happens to your demon oppression. I could say a lot more about that but in regard to all the many things you said in your OP stop going back trying to analyze every item in time you think you did wrong. I'll explain. In my past I was in employed in industry and had to work with computers as they connect to heavy machinery. Something would fault out and you could do one of two things.

Take the whole system apart and find out the problem....a long time to do OR simply hit the reset button. Hitting the reset forgets the past and starts with the NEW. So forget all the ins and outs of what you think you did wrong! You may not be able to totally comprehend any of that any way. If you feel you messed up then forget all the trying to figure it out just obey Jesus and come BOLDLY to throne of grace and find MERCY that God want's you to have. Heb 4:16

He's the one who told you to come this way for his precious blood is GREATER and MORE POWERFUL than anything you could have done with sin. Jesus wants you to have today a justified (just-as-if-you-never-sinned) consciousnesses ! Scripture says we overcome by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony. Rev 12:11
 
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Amittai

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Um may I know if you’re able to hear from God..?
No more than you. I've said another Our Father for you three. It's good to be sensitive to when we've bungled it to help us not bungle something bigger next time. I bungled something about two men's livelihoods (and it wasn't 100 % down to me anyway). One of them has bounced back (so far).
 
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