Played with Fire

[madison1101]

I love AA, and my sobriety. I recently got sick with anemia, iron deficiency. I also have B12 deficiency. I am in the middle of a five week series of IV iron infusions, and as a result, I slacked off in my meeting attendance. To compensate, I cut back on one of my psych meds, the one that helps me NOT be manic, but makes me drowsy. No iron, and that med made me overtired. So, I slacked off in my meeting attendance, and started to act out with my bipolar disorder. What does this have to do with alcohol abuse?

That is how I ended up in the psych hospital in January, and a rehab right afterward. The only thing I did right this time was not drink or drug. I finally got back to a meeting today, after more than a week of not making them.

Ironically, I went to a take out restaurant this afternoon to pick up some supper, and the coolers full of beer actually looked good to me today. I better make more meetings.

I am ready to do my fifth step with my sponsor. I look forward to getting rid of my resentments toward my family.

Trish

 

[denimdragon]

I know that feeling. I'm about to start trying to got to AA. I think it will help me with my drinking. I have been under a lot of stress so my drinking is worse. I have tried AA in the past but I did not take it serious. I have to know and with the lords help I will beat it. Please pray for me and I will pray for you.

 

[madison1101]

I know that feeling. I'm about to start trying to got to AA. I think it will help me with my drinking. I have been under a lot of stress so my drinking is worse. I have tried AA in the past but I did not take it serious. I have to know and with the lords help I will beat it. Please pray for me and I will pray for you.

My experience has been my relapses have a lot to do with the fact that I never completed all 12 steps with my sponsors. My goal is complete them all with the sponsor I currently have. The recovery is in making the changes because of the steps.

Good luck.

Praying.

Trish

 

[Jesus Freak62]

I've had 3 DWI's over a period of 6 years. I believe AA is a great tool, but ultimately it took my love for the Lord over my love for alcohol to get victory. It's a day by day thing, but so is our walk w/ the Lord. I've been sober for 18 years, and tobacco free for 13.5 years. Praise God!

 

[madison1101]

I've had 3 DWI's over a period of 6 years. I believe AA is a great tool, but ultimately it took my love for the Lord over my love for alcohol to get victory. It's a day by day thing, but so is our walk w/ the Lord. I've been sober for 18 years, and tobacco free for 13.5 years. Praise God!

Praise the Lord for your sobriety and being nicotine free. That is awesome.

I am one of those who needs AA. Some people get healed by the Lord all at once, and can manage to stay sober without outside support. I am one who is being healed through the 12 Steps of AA, and the love of His people.

For me, AA is more than a tool. It is a program of recovery that I must follow in order to have my relationship with the Lord healthy. He cannot work on me, and do His healing work in me if I do not surrender to the Steps and allow Him to free me from my resentments and my lack of forgiveness toward others. He cannot free me of selfishness if I do not reach out to the poor girls who come into AA living in recovery houses and halfway houses, who have lost everything, and are trying to rebuild their lives one day at a time. For me, the tools are reading the literature, praying, going to meetings, making phone calls and working with others. The program is the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.

God bless,
Trish

 

[Steffenfield]

This is night two for me. It's after 2:00 am so I'll make it through the night but could use a prayer that I might find some peace and sleep through this.

Dear Lord Jesus, I really hate those first nights trying to quit and hope I never forget how that feels like again.

I tried getting clean about 7 weeks ago and my first night I laid awake for 44 straight hours.

Last night wasn't too much fun either but I worry if this is really the time I'm finally done with it all.

I mean for it to be, but knowing me, I always seem to find a way to make an excuse for myself.

I'm getting really close to killing myself if I keep up this behavior. Too much to drink, stupid hot weather, and living alone.

I depend on my rock and Lord Savior Jesus Christ that this is the end of my foolishness.

I know AA is good for recovery, but so many people swear in these groups, even in a church group that I went to today. It was actually quite upsetting to hear such profanity in a house of God.

I think I'd rather hang out in place like this instead.

 

[hotsauce5000]

one day at a time!
after my last drink i spent 12 days in jail, so that kept me from drinking for 12 days. after that my bond ordered me not to consume or even posess alcohol. when i started probation 15 months ago, it stayed the same, no alcohol.
if you can do without alcohol, with the help of aa or celebrate recovery, it will be a much more pleasant route than having to go through a court, and the legal system.

believe me i know about the lonliness you mentioned. thats what had me out at a bar desperatley seeking companionship.

i would advise you to find a local aa group where you feel at home, reguardless of the type of people there. as long as you feel at home. once you have done that, announce in the meeting that you need a sponsor.

the people of aa have been where you are at, and you will not be lonely after you connect with a group like that. always someone to call and talk or ask questions, and always a place to be around the group.

by doing this, you will be surrounding yourself will people who actually care about your future.

you can even call me if you want, ive been where your at, use me as a gps to find your way!!


hotsauce

 

[Steffenfield]

Heya sauce!

After 3 tearful nights, my 4th had me heading back to the clubs.

I'm at one right now for the second night in a row.

I can only hope to live through this night.

So yeah, it's gotten very serious for me.

AA is not what I truly need in this life.

They speak of "these tables" or "this coffee" or "that book" which is their source of higher power.

Such blasphemy.

I can't take that road with them.

I went to an AA meeting on Friday held at a very nice church only to find it was for gays and lesbians that day.

So many people don't really get it but think they do.

Maybe I'm just the same.

But yeah, please PM me your number.

My phone no longer rings and I need help to recover.

I have a gentle spirit and I'm not profane.

There shouldn't be any harm talking on the phone with you.

I just hope you're a late nighter since this is the time of my deepest struggle.

 

[madison1101]

Heya sauce!

After 3 tearful nights, my 4th had me heading back to the clubs.

I'm at one right now for the second night in a row.

I can only hope to live through this night.

So yeah, it's gotten very serious for me.

AA is not what I truly need in this life.

They speak of "these tables" or "this coffee" or "that book" which is their source of higher power.

Such blasphemy.

I can't take that road with them.

I went to an AA meeting on Friday held at a very nice church only to find it was for gays and lesbians that day.

So many people don't really get it but think they do.

Maybe I'm just the same.

But yeah, please PM me your number.

My phone no longer rings and I need help to recover.

I have a gentle spirit and I'm not profane.

There shouldn't be any harm talking on the phone with you.

I just hope you're a late nighter since this is the time of my deepest struggle.

I follow the AA guidelines and only give my number to women in the program. You can get tons of men's phone numbers at an AA meeting, and they will gladly help you get sober. AA is not always full of profanity. Also, most people in AA will tell you not to call them if you have already been drinking, but to call before you drink.

It is interesting that you are full of criticism for the people in AA, their choices for a Higher Power, the gays and lesbians, the profanity, etc. BUT, they are staying sober. Your way is not working, so you may want to consider humility and going back to AA to learn from them about sobriety. I was once arrogant and thought I was better than the profane heathens at the meetings, and I ended up in a psychiatric hospital and then a rehab, and spent 12 days learning that my way did not work.

God bless.
Trish

 

[hotsauce5000]

pm sent steffenfeild,
gimme a shout

 

[Steffenfield]

pm sent steffenfeild,
gimme a shout

Thank you for last night, Hotsauce.

You came at a right time in my life and needed to hear what all you had to say.

God bless you.

 

[hotsauce5000]

your are sincerely welcome steffenfeild. I hope that my experience , strength, and hope will affect you in a positive manor.

 

[Steffenfield]

your are sincerely welcome steffenfeild. I hope that my experience , strength, and hope will affect you in a positive manor.

Yeah, it was enough to carry me through another night.

I didn't attend AA today like I promised but I did make it to church for two hours. That should hold me over until tomorrow when there's a Celebrate Recovery meeting that I'll be attending.

Many thanks again and I promise to keep in touch.

 

[hotsauce5000]

excelent!