- Aug 24, 2018
- 1,466
- 1,017
- Country
- United States
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Private
Being a victim of a crime, it really took a toll on me mentally. With OCD and Paranoia.
I am always overthinking things, "What if this happens?, What do I do?, How risky is this?"
Not now but in the past I was looking at legally obtaining a firearm, taking classes, martial arts (Which I have done as a hobby). Personally myself I do not have any interest in guns or shooting ranges. I would simply use them as a means of self-defense.
Now that I live in a better neighborhood, the crime rate is a lot different here, it is in fact more safer than the average American neighborhood even though this is near the Chicago area. I used to live in a neighborhood in the past that had bank robberies, shootings, and someone dead literally a mile where I live. I've personally heard gun shots, and can hear the bullet cutting through the air. This kind of environment growing up brought a lot of challenges to me psychologically.
Growing up I decided to go to the gym to get bigger, just to maybe lower the chances of being a target. And it worked.
It was actually this toxic environment which lead me to God, as not only was I looking for salvation for my soul, but salvation for my safety.
I still have those habits, of always looking behind me, both ways as I leave my house and walk to my car, double checking if the doors are locked, and getting really startled if I start hearing noises outside. I am trying to calm myself down.
Can I simply just trust in God to keep me safe? Or does it not work like that as in, whatever goes will go? like you could be swimming in a ocean, seemingly fine and then out of no where a shark attacks you?
I like to trust that God has everything under control, but honestly if something horrible were to happen and I did nothing to even cause it then I really don't know what I would think of it.
I am always overthinking things, "What if this happens?, What do I do?, How risky is this?"
Not now but in the past I was looking at legally obtaining a firearm, taking classes, martial arts (Which I have done as a hobby). Personally myself I do not have any interest in guns or shooting ranges. I would simply use them as a means of self-defense.
Now that I live in a better neighborhood, the crime rate is a lot different here, it is in fact more safer than the average American neighborhood even though this is near the Chicago area. I used to live in a neighborhood in the past that had bank robberies, shootings, and someone dead literally a mile where I live. I've personally heard gun shots, and can hear the bullet cutting through the air. This kind of environment growing up brought a lot of challenges to me psychologically.
Growing up I decided to go to the gym to get bigger, just to maybe lower the chances of being a target. And it worked.
It was actually this toxic environment which lead me to God, as not only was I looking for salvation for my soul, but salvation for my safety.
I still have those habits, of always looking behind me, both ways as I leave my house and walk to my car, double checking if the doors are locked, and getting really startled if I start hearing noises outside. I am trying to calm myself down.
Can I simply just trust in God to keep me safe? Or does it not work like that as in, whatever goes will go? like you could be swimming in a ocean, seemingly fine and then out of no where a shark attacks you?
I like to trust that God has everything under control, but honestly if something horrible were to happen and I did nothing to even cause it then I really don't know what I would think of it.
