I'm Having A Bit Of A Relationship Problem; Can You Please Help?
First of all, I want to thank you fellow believers for viewing this topic.
I don't want to make this too terribly long, but perhaps I can provide enough information regarding my circumstances to where you readers may be able to help me out.
You see, I met this woman in the spring semester of college last year, and towards the end when we discovered we were both Christians, we decided to keep in touch. It seems to be we had always been attracted to one another, but it wasn't until we met up a few times later that we started thinking about things. We went on a couple dates, and soon we discovered that we shared a spiritual connection that one rarely finds in another person. Furthermore, we both seemed to be seeing "signs" that our relationship was going to be a blessing from the Lord, and one night after we had been discussing what we want out of life, our feelings were so alike that I thought "this may be the one," because I decided long before that I was going to entrust the Lord to bring me the one He wanted for me.
Here's the problem. She moved to study at UCLA. She came down to visit a couple times, and it seemed to be our spiritual connection was so great that we were soon going to fall in love. We did. We found ourselves calling one another several times a day, our conversations running seriously on what kind of a marriage we wanted, how we both wanted to become missionaries, etc. We didn't discuss things on much of a romantic level, for fear of attachment, but the heavy conversations continued until one evening where we both spilled out hearts out. We are both young and have much to do before we could think of becoming involved, and we have to make our relationship with Jesus our first priority. Yet we both agreed that if it is the Lord's will, as she said" her people would be my people, and she'd follow me wherever she went," to quote the book of Ruth. But the infatuation just got too unhealthy, and the Lord suddenly took away the obsession from both of us on the same day. However, I becoming frightened, clung to the feelings anyway after I saw what He had done. The feelings consumed we until I told this girl that we had to stop. Now we have decided to be just friends until the circumstances are available to resume the courtship process.
But here's the thing: We were intoxicated with one another, but Jesus was always the foundation of our relationship. However, it seemed to be that the enemy caused us to drink of the fruit of the vine before we were ready. The intoxication, like alcohol, caused us to behave foolishly (not sexually, but emotional purity was an issue). She got over the hangover quickly, but as we know, some people still want to drink to make the hangover go away.
I received a dream from the Lord it seems, that appears to have been confirmed by the Song of Solomon. Further, I believe the Lord has promised me this relationship. But now things are somewhat difficult. The biggest problem is that I'm an extremist, in that I'm all or nothing. I'm having a problem deiscerning whether or not these "signs" are my own creation or of the Lord. For instance, last night I was going to randomly open my Bible to see if anything ministered to me on this whole, confusing issue. When I opened it, it opened to the page where I seemed to have my Song of Solomon dream confirmed.My eye was immediately caught to a verse that says "do not stir up or awaken love until it pleases." Like the young man in the thread "Relationships and the Lord," I am also wondering if I should forget this or if this whole situation was Him saying not to get too attached. But being the extremnist I am, I wonder if I should dismiss the whole thing as my own hogwash that I subjected this poor girl to and juust remain friends. Does God work like this? What shall I do?
First of all, I want to thank you fellow believers for viewing this topic.
I don't want to make this too terribly long, but perhaps I can provide enough information regarding my circumstances to where you readers may be able to help me out.
You see, I met this woman in the spring semester of college last year, and towards the end when we discovered we were both Christians, we decided to keep in touch. It seems to be we had always been attracted to one another, but it wasn't until we met up a few times later that we started thinking about things. We went on a couple dates, and soon we discovered that we shared a spiritual connection that one rarely finds in another person. Furthermore, we both seemed to be seeing "signs" that our relationship was going to be a blessing from the Lord, and one night after we had been discussing what we want out of life, our feelings were so alike that I thought "this may be the one," because I decided long before that I was going to entrust the Lord to bring me the one He wanted for me.
Here's the problem. She moved to study at UCLA. She came down to visit a couple times, and it seemed to be our spiritual connection was so great that we were soon going to fall in love. We did. We found ourselves calling one another several times a day, our conversations running seriously on what kind of a marriage we wanted, how we both wanted to become missionaries, etc. We didn't discuss things on much of a romantic level, for fear of attachment, but the heavy conversations continued until one evening where we both spilled out hearts out. We are both young and have much to do before we could think of becoming involved, and we have to make our relationship with Jesus our first priority. Yet we both agreed that if it is the Lord's will, as she said" her people would be my people, and she'd follow me wherever she went," to quote the book of Ruth. But the infatuation just got too unhealthy, and the Lord suddenly took away the obsession from both of us on the same day. However, I becoming frightened, clung to the feelings anyway after I saw what He had done. The feelings consumed we until I told this girl that we had to stop. Now we have decided to be just friends until the circumstances are available to resume the courtship process.
But here's the thing: We were intoxicated with one another, but Jesus was always the foundation of our relationship. However, it seemed to be that the enemy caused us to drink of the fruit of the vine before we were ready. The intoxication, like alcohol, caused us to behave foolishly (not sexually, but emotional purity was an issue). She got over the hangover quickly, but as we know, some people still want to drink to make the hangover go away.
I received a dream from the Lord it seems, that appears to have been confirmed by the Song of Solomon. Further, I believe the Lord has promised me this relationship. But now things are somewhat difficult. The biggest problem is that I'm an extremist, in that I'm all or nothing. I'm having a problem deiscerning whether or not these "signs" are my own creation or of the Lord. For instance, last night I was going to randomly open my Bible to see if anything ministered to me on this whole, confusing issue. When I opened it, it opened to the page where I seemed to have my Song of Solomon dream confirmed.My eye was immediately caught to a verse that says "do not stir up or awaken love until it pleases." Like the young man in the thread "Relationships and the Lord," I am also wondering if I should forget this or if this whole situation was Him saying not to get too attached. But being the extremnist I am, I wonder if I should dismiss the whole thing as my own hogwash that I subjected this poor girl to and juust remain friends. Does God work like this? What shall I do?
Could not have put it better myself.
