A man down is walking through a well-to-do neighborhood looking for odd jobs to do when he approaches this one house. He goes up to the house, rings the bell and the owner comes to the door. He asks the man what he can do for him. The man tells him of his situation, that it's not going too well for him and wants to know if he has any odd jobs that he could do. The man thinks about it for a second and then remembers that he has been wanting his porch painted. He asks the man if he paints? The man says, "Sure anything." The man replies, "Well, I have been wanting my porch painted, how much would you charge?" Responding quickly, "I don't know, say $50 bucks." To the man's delight, "Sounds good. Go ahead and get started." He closes the door and walks back inside. His wife asks him, "Who was at the door?" He tells her of the man and his situation and then told his wife that the man agreed to paint the porch for $50 bucks. The astonished wife says, "$50 bucks, but that porch goes the full length of our house and then some. It will be at least a few hours job. You really should pay him more." He responds, "But that's all he said he wanted." 10 minutes later, they get a knock on the door. The man answers the door and the man is there and he says, "Done!" With a surprised look on his face, "I can't believe it, you're already done painting the entire porch." "Yes, and by the way it's not a porch it's a Ferrari."
Argh! Argh! My sides doth split!
WHAT ARE YOU SMUGGLING? Juan comes up to the Mexican border on his bicycle. He has two large bags over his shoulders. The guard stops him and says, "What's in the bags?" "Sand," answered Juan. The guard says, "We'll just see about that. Get off the bike." The guard takes the bags and rips them apart; he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand. He detains Juan overnight and has the sand analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags The guard releases Juan, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the man's shoulders, and lets him cross the border. A week later, the same thing happens. The guard asks, "What have you got?" "Sand," says Juan. The guard does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand. He gives the sand back to Juan, and Juan crosses the border on his bicycle. This sequence of events if repeated every day for three years. Finally, Juan doesn't show up one day and the guard meets him in a Cantina in Mexico. "Hey, Buddy," says the guard, "I know you are smuggling something. It's driving me crazy. It's all I think about..... I can't sleep. Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?" Juan sips his drink and says, "Bicycles."
Now that is just AWFUL!
Noddingdog
Argh! Argh! My sides doth split!
WHAT ARE YOU SMUGGLING? Juan comes up to the Mexican border on his bicycle. He has two large bags over his shoulders. The guard stops him and says, "What's in the bags?" "Sand," answered Juan. The guard says, "We'll just see about that. Get off the bike." The guard takes the bags and rips them apart; he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand. He detains Juan overnight and has the sand analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags The guard releases Juan, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the man's shoulders, and lets him cross the border. A week later, the same thing happens. The guard asks, "What have you got?" "Sand," says Juan. The guard does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand. He gives the sand back to Juan, and Juan crosses the border on his bicycle. This sequence of events if repeated every day for three years. Finally, Juan doesn't show up one day and the guard meets him in a Cantina in Mexico. "Hey, Buddy," says the guard, "I know you are smuggling something. It's driving me crazy. It's all I think about..... I can't sleep. Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?" Juan sips his drink and says, "Bicycles."
Now that is just AWFUL!
Noddingdog
