So I've been single for like 3 months now. I'm a junior in high school. I recently went to this new youth group in my town, which I hadn't gone to, and I didn't really know anybody in my small town, I travel to the next town where I go to school and work for my friends. Anyways, so while at this youth group, I met 3 girls, 1 goes to the same school as my last girlfriend, she's an 8th grader...the other 2 go to my school, but one is a freshmen and the other an 8th grader. All 3 girls have given me their CLUES and you can just tell for sure they like me, besides the fact I was told that they all do. First problem, the two 8th graders...while they're really mature, very pretty for their age, and modest, as well as all 3 of them being christians, I'm scared that might still be too young for me to date them. So first opinion of that...junior going out with 8th grader? Next my brother is in 7th grade, he likes one of the girls, but she likes me and not him. I'm in no rush for a relationship, nor do I want to hurt my brother's feelings, but these girls are more mature then my last girlfriend who was the same age as me, and for being in middle school are very attractive to me. I could see it being easier if we were both adults or older, because age is less a problem, but then if it's fine in the far future why not now. Hmm, who knows, I don't wanna be known as like the kid who goes after smaller girls, and I don't want it to be a persuasion thing like I use my age against them, and I wouldn't, but I'm really confused on this in general even if I didn't have the problem, because one of my friends who is a girl is in a relationship with a guy in college and she is just a sophomore. They too are both Christians.
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Ok, Opinions Needed!!!
- Thread starter dastangman
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ok, the reason it matters now and not later is more because of how the parents feel than many things. But also in the time from 8th grade to adult you mature a lot! Don't be in a rush, pray about it.You can PM me if you want.
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~Beauty_from_Pain~
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Isn't it nice when there are people who want to "go out with us"? Lol, I know the feeling! Makes one feel all good inside to be liked by the opposite sex! Yet...there is a right time and a wrong time to do things. I wouldn't recommend anyone dating until they are at least 16. The reason why I feel this way is because young people should be focused on other things besides the opposite sex....like school, activities, their friends and family. At 16, you can't even get married without your parent's consent...I would say to people that they should wait until they are at least 18 to date for many reasons.
At your age you might be wanting to date, but I would recommend waiting. If that is not something that you will do, than at least don't date anyone younger than 16. Remember, you aren't an adult, free to make your choices until you are 18, and neither is anyone else.
If you care to chat more...send me a message.
Blessings,
Starling2003
At your age you might be wanting to date, but I would recommend waiting. If that is not something that you will do, than at least don't date anyone younger than 16. Remember, you aren't an adult, free to make your choices until you are 18, and neither is anyone else.
If you care to chat more...send me a message.
Blessings,
Starling2003
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You asked for opinions, so here's mine!
Methinks you should leave all 3 of them alone as far as romance goes. Friendship is one thing, but in your mid teens you've got so much to be thinking about & decisions to make about your future- I think you'd be better off not pursuing a girl romantically until you can do something more about it- say, until you can seriously consider marriage.
I'm advising this cause this is how my fiance and I did it, and it is SO totally worth it to not have a history of past girlfriends & breakups, etc. It's an incredible kind of trust, when you know this person waited for you without any goofing off with other girls!
Also, if I were you, I'd consider investing the time you're thinking of putting into a new girlfriend into a full time job (if you can handle it) instead. That's another thing my future husband did. He's worked full time since he was 15, along with going to school, and that's the reason we can get married at 21 and have a house & a new car to boot... Think about it!
Blessings,
Joy
Methinks you should leave all 3 of them alone as far as romance goes. Friendship is one thing, but in your mid teens you've got so much to be thinking about & decisions to make about your future- I think you'd be better off not pursuing a girl romantically until you can do something more about it- say, until you can seriously consider marriage.
I'm advising this cause this is how my fiance and I did it, and it is SO totally worth it to not have a history of past girlfriends & breakups, etc. It's an incredible kind of trust, when you know this person waited for you without any goofing off with other girls!
Also, if I were you, I'd consider investing the time you're thinking of putting into a new girlfriend into a full time job (if you can handle it) instead. That's another thing my future husband did. He's worked full time since he was 15, along with going to school, and that's the reason we can get married at 21 and have a house & a new car to boot... Think about it!
Blessings,
Joy
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Carri20
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Hehe... I love it when people ask for opinions.
1. IN MY OPINION 8th graders are definitely too young for you right now. I don't care how mature they seem, their brains aren't fully developed in a lot of important areas and they still have no idea what true love is. All they know is infatuation. So the most you could possibly hope to gain from them now is a short-term relationship that leads nowhere (except maybe to heartache).
2. IN MY OPINION you are under no obligation to pick your dates based on how your brother feels. If he likes the girl so much then he should ask her out. If he doesn't, someone else will eventually. If you're determined to ask one of these 8th graders out and you're feeling guilty because of your brother, give him a fair chance. Tell him that if he doesn't make a move soon, you will.
1. IN MY OPINION 8th graders are definitely too young for you right now. I don't care how mature they seem, their brains aren't fully developed in a lot of important areas and they still have no idea what true love is. All they know is infatuation. So the most you could possibly hope to gain from them now is a short-term relationship that leads nowhere (except maybe to heartache).
2. IN MY OPINION you are under no obligation to pick your dates based on how your brother feels. If he likes the girl so much then he should ask her out. If he doesn't, someone else will eventually. If you're determined to ask one of these 8th graders out and you're feeling guilty because of your brother, give him a fair chance. Tell him that if he doesn't make a move soon, you will.
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findinghope06
Child of the Risen Lord
dastangman said:
well i think that 8th graders are too young to be dating period. in 8th grade, i didnt know who was or what i wanted (and i knew many christian 8th grades who were the same way) they have many years left of school and A LOT can change in that time. there is nothing wrong with being friends with them but i dont think a relationship would be a good idea right now (thats just my opinion, and if you do decide to pursue a relationship with them, i will be praying for you both and i wish you both the best of luck)
and remember you are young too. you have so much time to get into relationships. i wish i would have focused more on friendships in high school b/c i spent almost all 4 years worried about never having a bf and becoming incredibly depressed. friendships are always great and you can see what happens later down the road. good luck with everything and feel free to PM me if you want to talk more.
God Bless you
In His Love,
Stephanie
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I
Inperfected
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Um... can you post ages not just grades... 
I'm not very up with grades, and have no idea of the ages you are talking about...
I'm not very up with grades, and have no idea of the ages you are talking about...
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findinghope06
Child of the Risen Lord
Inperfected said:Um... can you post ages not just grades...
lets see. 8th grade is about 13 or 14
9th grade is 14 or 15
11th grade is 16 or 17
i think those are the only grades we were talking about. i hope that helps
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That's true, I prayed a lot about it. And after looking this over I'm pretty sure I should hold off. To the one who posted about a full time job, I do. I mean it isn't full full time, but when I'm not at football practice, I'm there, and when I'm not there I'll be at school or something. To be honest, those two things football and my job have held me down so much this summer I haven't had time for family, or friends, let alone a girlfriend. My last girlfriend was a year younger then me, and maybe I should have thought about that some more before I asked on here, because even one year made a huge difference in our maturity. The only reason I really got serious about questioning this matter is because of my friend who is dating a guy in college, the same amount of years apart from the 14 year old girls to me, and her and this guy have been together for several several months, more then anyone guessed. Both parents are cool with the idea, and they both seem to not want to stop the relationship anytime soon, if ever. And me being 16, I looked at it as though it's only 2 years! My parents are farther apart in age then that, so yeah I wasn't really thinking. I guess I got swept up into that whole Oh My Gosh, all these girls like me deal and lost my head. OH WELL, it happens! Thanks
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I
Inperfected
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The older you are (probly til mid 20's - 30's) the easier the age gap is... At a young age (anyone under mid 20's i'm guessing) will usually (not always) struggle with age gaps. My personal ideals hold me to no more than a year older or younger at this age. More than that and you start to get into a different maturity group..
Just be careful not to jump the gun
Just be careful not to jump the gun
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Hee hee-- I like how you put that! It's so true, it just happens!! That's life I guess... God bless you lots!
Joy
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