Ok first off I want to make it clear

[Evee]

Really? I am not. It annoys me when people think I'm some kindof Puritan. Hey, I think there's an ideal a standard, a best way to live, a goal I'm running towards but I haven't ceased to be a human being in the process, a sexually active human being who's open-minded in that sense, most likely because of my environment growing up. I only accept such an ideal because I think it is ultimately good and true not because I prefer it, but it's good for me and I have to sacrifice, not become less human but give up part of what I would like to do because of what I would like that's better, even if it was only something as simple as stability or a healthy marriage or whatever.

I am when it comes to inappropriate content.
When it comes to any kind of cruelty or abuse.
Yeah I believe I am sorta a prude.

 

[LibertyChic]

To be honest I am not sure what it does to ones spirit or ego.
I am not as open minded as I used to be.
I am just curious as to how people feel about it and if it bothers the consience?
Thanks Liberty Chic.

What I have seen does not bother my conscience.

 

[Peaceful1]

Well I asked the question because I was interested how Christians and non felt about it and to see if there was that much of a difference in their belief.
It doesn't seem to be.

I am not trying to justify it.
I just like to understand what makes people think the way they do.
I am a prude.

I know you are not trying to justify it. What I'm saying is people do.

 

[Peaceful1]

No, that there seem to be no Gods. I have values coming out my ears.

Where did you get your values?

 

[Evee]

I know you are not trying to justify it. What I'm saying is people do.

Thanks... and yes I agreee.

 

[Clem is Me]

Where did you get your values?

Observation, trial and error, upbringing. Like anyone else.

 

[Theresa]

I am when it comes to inappropriate content.
When it comes to any kind of cruelty or abuse.
Yeah I believe I am sorta a prude.

I don't know. As the poster a page or so back pointed out, unless you can draw a direct correlation that says that inappropriate content always necessarily is linked to abuse, I can't, from a purely secular standpoint say that it's bad in that sense. I can say it's bad because of what it does to people who view it. I don't know what kind of abuse we are talking about. There are posters that have been on CF who have been in inappropriate content flicks I think, or who have nude pictures of themselves that they spread around, and they do so freely, where's the abuse? I think some women who are inappropriate content stars or whatever probably aren't necessarily mentally healthy, and that's not to say that "oh what, if a woman thinks it's ok to be a sort of exhibitionist then she's mentally unstable?" No, not necessarily that either. But I think some of the things that drive women to do such things are for some reason other than that they just like to show themselves off. They say alot of prostitutes were themselves sexually abused as kids. Anyways, bottom-line if they are freely selling, why can't someone buy? I don't see a direct link between abuse and inappropriate content that is true in all cases. I don't see that inappropriate content necessarily causes abuse. I think it does other things, some of which I've mentioned and some of which I haven't but as far as the abuse is concerned...... I think it's wrong for quite a few reasons and I haven't even brought in Christian reasons for thinking it's wrong.

 

[Seeking...]

I don't have a problem with couples viewing inappropriate content - provided it is legal, and they both consent to the type of material and the amount they watch it. Honestly,(not that I know a lot about it) but there is a variety of material out there - there are actors who run the show now who are not drug addicted pawns. Any type of mainstream inappropriate content is only going to show consensual acts. I do think it can act as a marital aid. The few times I did view it with my husband, we probably only saw about 5 minutes of it - it was simply another way to get the engine started and then we went on our own way. It is not like a drama where you have to keep watching to see how it ends! And to this date - no inappropriate content I have ever seen has effected my expectations in sex - I don't know about anyone else - but I can't see one without being aware every second that it is fake and at least slightly corny! I guess I think of inappropriate content as being farcical - the actual sex is funny - but it can offer up the occasional good idea.

 

[Evee]

Theresa you seem to be contradicting your self.
One minute you are against and the next minute it is ok.
Yes I know I have saw some nude layouts of certain people from Christian Forums.
Everybody gets naked for petes sake.
I am talking inappropriate content.
I think of someones needs inappropriate content for a jump start then.......You all go ahead now because I am done.

 

[dkara]

The question was: "For non Christians do you find it accetable for a couple married or otherwise to enjoy inappropriate content together?"

As a non-C I deduce that married couples or unmarried for that fact can use inappropriate content as they wish.

If they feel badly about using it they should not do so.

I don't want to use it because of the abuse of young girls built into the inappropriate content industry. But that is just me.

If it is wrong, then the offenders will be judged and tried and punished by the C-god, right? [talking to C's cause my god doesn't do this]

So let folks do what they want behind closed door. We live in a democracy [well actually a Repubic] with free-trade and folks can do what they want and we really aren't to judge. Even the Bible says 'don't judge.'

 

[Socrastein]

Actually, the Bible says "Judge not lest ye be judged", in other words, only judge people if you're willing to undergo the same scrutiny. Basically, "Don't be a hypocrite".

 

[dkara]

Actually, the Bible says "Judge not lest ye be judged", in other words, only judge people if you're willing to undergo the same scrutiny. Basically, "Don't be a hypocrite".

Right. Which is basically a way of saying, "Don't do it."

 

[Evee]

Actually when I started this thread it was to see if christians and non christians view inappropriate content the same way.
If christians watch inappropriate content and feel guilty for it.
It was not meant to be about judging.
Any how I will let anyone interested reply I just had to make the comment that this was not for judging.

 

[Theresa]

Theresa you seem to be contradicting your self.
One minute you are against and the next minute it is ok.
Yes I know I have saw some nude layouts of certain people from Christian Forums.
Everybody gets naked for petes sake.
I am talking inappropriate content.
I think of someones needs inappropriate content for a jump start then.......You all go ahead now because I am done.

Oh sorry, yes I am kinda contradicting myself on purpose. It is useful to be able to understand an opposite mindset or even common feeling ie: put yourself in someone else's position in order to see it as they do. From their perspective, I don't see a direct correlation between inappropriate content and abuse. I think abuse is true in some cases but not in all. I was basically just saying that I don't agree with the reasons some people think it is wrong, I dont' think those reasons are adequate to make a good enough case. That's not to say that I don't think it is wrong in the sense of something people shouldn't do, that's just to say that it is not necessarily wrong because there is abuse in some cases. As far as that goes, let's go back a few years to the temperance movement. Some people abuse alcohol, sure. Some people's families are badly affected by it, it ruins some people's lives but.......should people still be allowed to drink if they so choose?

And nude pics are inappropriate content as well. Looking back once again, how many years ago, that's what was on the pages of the girly mags. Now it's more regularily hard-core.

 

[Avatar]

Oh sorry, yes I am kinda contradicting myself on purpose. It is useful to be able to understand an opposite mindset or even common feeling ie: put yourself in someone else's position in order to see it as they do. From their perspective, I don't see a direct correlation between inappropriate content and abuse. I think abuse is true in some cases but not in all. I was basically just saying that I don't agree with the reasons some people think it is wrong, I dont' think those reasons are adequate to make a good enough case. That's not to say that I don't think it is wrong in the sense of something people shouldn't do, that's just to say that it is not necessarily wrong because there is abuse in some cases. As far as that goes, let's go back a few years to the temperance movement. Some people abuse alcohol, sure. Some people's families are badly affected by it, it ruins some people's lives but.......should people still be allowed to drink if they so choose?

And nude pics are inappropriate content as well. Looking back once again, how many years ago, that's what was on the pages of the girly mags. Now it's more regularily hard-core.

Isn't it though. A few years ago I bought a penthouse - reliving my teenage years. It was grotesque. I remember Playboy and Penthouse 15-20 years ago and the photos were... I don't know how to describe it... pictures of attractive women without their clothes on. Now they're like medical texts, women as contortionists with every last part of their anatomy exposed. I have no use for it, it sickens me.

 

[fashionably_lonely]

What if it's only one woman in the inappropriate content? or one guy? What if there's no fornication? For example, and i've even seen this "permissibly" allowed by one pastor's website, looking at pictures/movies of a solo person. Now, I'd go so far as to say one can be turned on/aroused/enjoy a solo act without wanting to actually have sex with them. Say in the case of a model pic or um, solo act. I suppose a married couple could have the same experience with watching another couple have sex in a inappropriate contento, but i wouldn't suggest it to most Christian women i've dated by any means.

 

[Clem is Me]

Isn't it though. A few years ago I bought a penthouse - reliving my teenage years. It was grotesque. I remember Playboy and Penthouse 15-20 years ago and the photos were... I don't know how to describe it... pictures of attractive women without their clothes on. Now they're like medical texts, women as contortionists with every last part of their anatomy exposed. I have no use for it, it sickens me.

I hear that, although I don't find Playboy all that bad. But the worst for me, even when I was a teenager, was Hustler. Ugh. For a while I had certain titles that I picked up, lingerie photos from Playboy, mainly, because I thought they were far more whatever I thought I liked than the gynononsense.

It's a little ironic that, after I got the internet all those years ago and did the month long "type in any word and see what inappropriate contento page it finds" I grew tired of being able to see anything I wanted - or didn't want. In the end I surfed through the pages just to find the occasional tasteful photo or movie.

Which is why I tend to think the reason inappropriate content IS such a draw to some people is precisely because we say it shouldn't be. Some folks like the idea of naughty far more than the naughty. I did, anyway. And once you get bored with the idea, things get back into balance.

My brother, a terribly attractive man by all standards (punk, hate him) once asked me very sincerely how one does NOT cheat on the woman they love. He would be accosted just about anywhere he went, and frankly few guys are strong enough to turn that down EVERY time. It's a tough question for him, and I, being the ugliest man in the world had little good advice to give. I get hit on about as often as Haley's comet passes by. What I told him was that the his...male bits... don't care where the action is coming from. It's the mind that you have to conquer. Is the feeling of a strange woman really THAT much better than the woman you love? Is it ANY better? Not really.There is some variation, but seriously, it's not like each girl is a new species or something. You have to tranfer that immediate reaction to a more sublime pattern of thinking. Flirting is fun enough, but save the real for when you are alone with your lady, then let it explode. Hey, works for me...I imagine.

My wife and I will occasionally play the "would do him/her if I were dead?" game. You have to have control of your ego, but you actually end up learning a heck of a lot from it, not about sexual preference, but about what your partner finds compelling in certain people. As often as not it's nothing physical, and it's a character trait you may be able to incoporate into your own (it's almost always something positive. If not you just laugh at her and move on...). If nothing else it gets you even closer to the person you are building a life with, and somehow it makes it easier to trust them. If I know her "secrets" they don't threaten me.

Back when I was a rocknroller I would actually find myself in situations where some woman was maybe making some suggestive this and thats. I found that going home and telling my wife about them somehow made the ideas that creep into any healthy man's mind dissipate almost immediately. I can actually say that in almost 20 years I have not cheated on my wife. It's not a boast, but when I look at the people around me in my life it's frighteningly rare.

When I was nine a boy named Jeffry called me a potato chip and started crying...

Ooopps. Sorry bout that. Got a bit carried away.

 

[fashionably_lonely]

I think playboy is bad.. not because of the content, but because of the pictures. I intensely disliked airbrushed/faked glam photography.

 

[Clem is Me]

I think playboy is bad.. not because of the content, but because of the pictures. I intensely disliked airbrushed/faked glam photography.

Yes, well, to each their own.

 

[Natman]

That this is not me I am referring too.

For non Christians do you find it accetable for a couple married or otherwise to enjoy inappropriate content together?

For Christians is it acceptable for a married couple to enjoy inappropriate content together?
Would this draw them closer as a couple or eventually destroy their
relationship?

The bible speaks of being evenly yoked if both people are *married to each other* and they enjoy inappropriate content is this a sin?
What does this mean... the marriage bed is not defiled?

I am a Christian.

I think it depends on what your definition of the word "inappropriate content" is.

I would not desire to do ANYTHING that would enrich the "inappropriate content" industry which feeds on young women and promotes extramarital and dangerous sex and I fail to see how such films could possibly be edifying to any relationship.

I believe that anything that would be "allowable" into the bedroom would star only a single married couple, depicting safe sexual activity within the confines of marriage. The Bible itself includes such and erotic story in the Song of Solomon.

If you consider that to be "inappropriate content", than my answer would be a resounding "It depends!"

It MIGHT be okay as long as it is edifying to the marriage, and neither party is drawn into fantacizing about having sex with the stars of the film (Biblically considered "adultery").

I know of very few men, however, that can stop at that.

I would not even consider the possibility for my marriage.

Son-cerely,
Nate