Odd Patron Saints

[Unofficial Reverand Alex]

Proverbs 17:22 A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit saps a person’s strength.​

This is not meant to launch any kind of debate on the saints or any doctrines thereof; I simply wanted to share a fun list of one of the quirks of the traditional branches of Christianity, with our habit of canonizing people (declaring them a saint), and sometimes declaring them as "patron" of something they exemplified throughout their life (teaching, making beer, etc.).

This is all copied from this website: Top 20 Odd Patronages of Saints Please enjoy!

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It has long been Catholic tradition to assign a certain patronage to different Saints. These usually are assigned because of a certain location, career, event, etc. that a Saint had. For instance, since St. Luke was a physician, he is one of several patrons of doctors.

There are others who have patronages are quite odd.
NOTE – In making this list, I do not intend to ridicule the Saints or those they intercede for.

Here is my personal top 20 list of odd patronages of the Saints, in reverse order.

20 – St. Drogo – Patron of coffee houses, unattractive people, midwives, mute persons, and cattle.
-I really don’t see any pattern here. Was he one of the “catch-all” saints?

19 – St. Joseph of Cupertino – Patron of air travelers, astronauts, and pilots.
Why these three? Because he was known to levitate. I have this feeling that astronauts and pilots are using a different principle of flight than he did.


18 – St. Sebastian – Patron of hardware stores.
I wonder if he prefers Lowe’s, Ace, or Home Depot?

17 – St. Joseph of Arimathea – Patron of undertakers, morticians, and pallbearers.
See what you get for giving Jesus your tomb?

16 – St. Friard – Patron against fear of wasps.
When Friard was tormented for his piety, a swarm of wasps went after his tormentors – BZZZZZ

15 – St. Teresa of Avila – Patron of people ridiculed for their piety.
All who are ridiculed for their piety should pray to her – except for St. Friard, who takes care of them himself.

14 – St. Magnus of Füssen – Patron against caterpillars.
Couldn’t he just wait until they turned to butterflies? Yes, I know they can turn into moths and caterpillars can destroy crops…

13 – St. Clare of Assisi – Patron of TV writers.
I have this feeling that the writers of Charles in Charge never prayed to St. Clare.

12 – Our Lady of the Annunciation – Patron of Texas.
Of course, us Texans will not settle for anything less than the #1 Saint – Mary.

11 – St. Barbara – Patron against things that go BOOM (lightning, artillery, mine collapse, fire, etc.)
Her father had her beheaded after she became a Christian, then he was killed by lightning.

10 – St. Julian the Hospitaller – Patron of wandering musicians, clowns, murderers, carnival workers, and fiddle players.
St. Julian killed his parents by accident while they were visiting. They were sleeping in his bed and he thought his wife was cheating on him.

9 – St. Germaine Cousin – Patron of girls from rural areas.

Sometimes the patronages get very specific.
8 – Blessed Columba of Rietti – Patron against sorcerers.
Does this include Gandalf? Not Gandalf, right?

7 – St. Gertrude of Nivelles – Patron of recently dead people.
When is someone no longer “recently” dead?

6 – St. Patrick – Patron against ophidiophobia (abnormal fear of snakes).
I don’t think there is anything “abnormal” about fearing snakes.

5 – St. Columbanus – Patron of motorcyclists.
I believe this patronage comes from him multiplying bread and beer for his community. Emphasis on the beer.

4 – St. Drausinus – Patron of invincible people.
If they are invincible, do they need a patron saint?

3 – St. Benedict of Nursia – Patron of spelunkers.

You will thank me the next time you are caught in a cave.
2 – St. Theodore of Sykeon – Patron for AND against rain.
Hmmmm. I art confused.

1 – St. Isidore of Seville – Patron of the Internet.
He googled himself and found this list.

Just missed the list:
Saint Servatus – Patron against lameness – this list is pretty lame.

 

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St. Julian...