I've never been diagnosed with ocd but I think I have some symptoms like when I set the alarm clock, sometimes it seems like it just wont register in my mind that its set, so ill turn it off and on over and over saying to myself "ok.. its 10pm and the alarm is set for 6am" and ill do that several times. Samething with the stove or shutting doors and a few other things. Some of the more obvious things aren't as bad as they used to be, I guess cause I didn't want people to see me do them so I just try to ignore the impulse. I also sometimes feel tormented because I'm so aware of my own sin and shortcomings. I know im saved by grace through faith, and I can't lose my salvation, and I can't earn it and I'm not trying to but my imperfection drives me crazy. But if you knew me you would never know it because (for example) my car is always a mess and im always running late. Also when I pray I get frustrated because I feel like im just talking to myself, one reason is because im so easily destracted and have a hard time focusing and another reason is because I feel like I need to picture God in my mind even though its impossible (I don't know if that's the best way to describe it.. I don't know.. its weird.lol) I feel like im treating God like He is just a lucky rabbits foot or something. And when I say "in Jesus's name I pray amen" I say it over and over and then maybe switch it up and say "In the name of Jesus" .... so anyway some days are worse than others and how tired I am or stress adds to it also... which makes me even more stressed.. oh and one more example: I don't have alot of money but I want to be a good steward with what God has intrusted to me so if I spend money on something like a bottle of pop I feel really guilty and stressed out especially if im behind on bills.. sorry for the long post.. but if anyone could tell me if all of these are symptoms of OCD or just some or what?
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ocd or me?
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jehoiakim
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yes they are symptoms of OCD. I have have a very mild case of it, it isn't everyday and usually only lasts 2 to 5 minutes at a time. but it is similar to what you have experienced. It has been worse in the past where I had to check and it was say 45 minutes. I have found it helpful to stop in the middle of it, make myself pray and and tell myself "okay I can check for 15 more seconds and then I need to be done" and if something bad occurs because "i didn't check it right" then I need to get serious psychological help because I know I checked it thoroughly, then I remind myself God is in control of everything and if something and whatever happens was meant to be... that usually works every time for me.
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SoldierOfSoul
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Yes, this is a mild case of OCD, since it is a mild case though, you may be able, through sheer will power, to stop the obsessions. What feeds the obsessions is the anxiety and compulsive repetition to relieve it through rituals.
If you stop the rituals you will stop the anxiety.
Next time you feel a compulsion to revisit an act you have already completed, force yourself to NOT do the act, this WILL in turn bring anxiety, but the longer you keep from doing the ritual, the more the anxiety will begin to fade.
Try and occupy your mind, keep your thoughts on something you like doing, or read scripture, but do not obsess, you need to show yourself that the anxiety will indeed pass and the rituals are not based in reality but a figment of OCD. You will learn to control your own thoughts instead of your thoughts controlling you. Just remind yourself that you have already done those things and you need to get on with the rest of your day and that is that.
I was able to overcome many compulsive rituals in this way, I still struggle with scrupulosity, but the more ridiculous obsessions are gone.
Guilt is an awful experience and trust me I struggle with it too. But I believe a healthy realization of our own unworthiness and sinfulness is a great blessing. The more we see our own hopelessness towards sin we will learn to lean on the Holy Spirit and the life of freedom from sin He offers through the resurrection of Christ.
I love this quote:
“My memory is nearly gone, but I remember two things: That I am a great sinner and that Christ is a great Savior.” —John Newton
This is really all that matters, we are sinners who Christ has saved. The worst the sinner, the more in need of the Saviour.
I cannot really offer any advice on this, because I too struggle in this way with OCD, it has almost taken over my prayer life...All I can think of is just don't let OCD win, trust that God hears you no matter what and that He looks at your heart and nothing else.
I hope this will be of some help, God bless you brother.
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tripletiger1200
Amazing Grace, How Sweet the Sound
It's OCD. I have the money thing, like you. I used to have terrible spending habits but now I'm almost afraid to spend on myself, and every time I do I feel guilty. This early on if you just ignore the compulsions to check things or to redo your prayers, or let yourself buy a snack or something every once in a while you can probably nip it in the butt. Pray about it too.
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