I pray to the Generic God who is different than Christian God due to ocd.
The last months, I have been playing a game known as League Of Legends and ended up having some ocd worries about it.
Ocd was forcing me to play the game in a specific way (no detailes needed) and many times thoughts without my will about it happened. I ended up getting frustrated of this ocd compulsion that somehow it was created another ocd.
the new ocd was used as a defense to my old ocd. how? it was forcing me to do what I want and not do the old ocd compulsion and this would stop my worries in case I was not doing the ocd compulsion. but it would trap me later. how?
When ocd was telling me to do an old ocd compulsion, I was so frustrated that I would have without my will some thoughts in my head without my will. I do not remember if these thoughts were thoughts without my will to myself or to my ocds but I know they were thoughts without my will. these thoughts without my will would scare me and also try to force me to do what I want and not obey the ocd compulsion. scary one the one hand but would relieve me on the other, without my will.
Yesterday, due to an old ocd compulsion I had to choose which ocd compulsion to do. the old compulsion or the new compulsion? the two compulsions do not agree so if I do one it is like not doing the other compulsion.
the reason I worry is because, the new compulsion is not doing the old ocd compulsion. why worry? because the new compulsion is created by my frustration and thoughts without my will that happen in a second and they relieve me. and if I do not obey the new compulsion I get worries like
ocd new: why you did not do the new compulsion? maybe the new compulsion is not a real compulsion but a promise to the Generic God that you use it as an excuse to make your ocd stop giving you worries. instead of just ignoring ocd maybe you make random fast promise to the Generic God in order to relief your ocd. the last month, you did it many times. are you sure they were thoughts without your will? maybe for a second they were thoughts with your will and maybe you made a promise with your will to the Generic God.
what do you think guys?
The last months, I have been playing a game known as League Of Legends and ended up having some ocd worries about it.
Ocd was forcing me to play the game in a specific way (no detailes needed) and many times thoughts without my will about it happened. I ended up getting frustrated of this ocd compulsion that somehow it was created another ocd.
the new ocd was used as a defense to my old ocd. how? it was forcing me to do what I want and not do the old ocd compulsion and this would stop my worries in case I was not doing the ocd compulsion. but it would trap me later. how?
When ocd was telling me to do an old ocd compulsion, I was so frustrated that I would have without my will some thoughts in my head without my will. I do not remember if these thoughts were thoughts without my will to myself or to my ocds but I know they were thoughts without my will. these thoughts without my will would scare me and also try to force me to do what I want and not obey the ocd compulsion. scary one the one hand but would relieve me on the other, without my will.
Yesterday, due to an old ocd compulsion I had to choose which ocd compulsion to do. the old compulsion or the new compulsion? the two compulsions do not agree so if I do one it is like not doing the other compulsion.
the reason I worry is because, the new compulsion is not doing the old ocd compulsion. why worry? because the new compulsion is created by my frustration and thoughts without my will that happen in a second and they relieve me. and if I do not obey the new compulsion I get worries like
ocd new: why you did not do the new compulsion? maybe the new compulsion is not a real compulsion but a promise to the Generic God that you use it as an excuse to make your ocd stop giving you worries. instead of just ignoring ocd maybe you make random fast promise to the Generic God in order to relief your ocd. the last month, you did it many times. are you sure they were thoughts without your will? maybe for a second they were thoughts with your will and maybe you made a promise with your will to the Generic God.
what do you think guys?
