OCD and God dont mix.

[Harley.]

I have suffered with OCD for 17 years.

17. Long. Years.

Now, up until last summer I was an atheist, so for the majority of my OCD journey, its been your typical "if you dont touch that 12 times you will die" crap.

Then I found God.

Oh boy did my OCD take off. Telling me certain thoughts were from God, which added validity, and then the one big kicker. The physical sensations. These blasted things would respond to certain thoughts, and act as an "answer" from the Lord. If I got one after the thought, the thought was false. And what was worse, was that they were RIGHT. Literally always. Now typically I am pretty cool about my OCD, but this has had me seriously freaked cause I honestly can't tell if it IS God or not.

If that wasnt bad enough, it had to up the ante one more. It had to attack the one thing I hold most dear: music.

Backstory time: I am a music producer/composer. I don't actually play any instruments, but I love producing music, and do so for a living. I have had a decent amount of success and have been told that I am actually really good at it. (This is not me bragging, any talent or skill I have comes from God, and I am grateful for him having given me these abilities.) If you were to ask me what my biggest desire is, I would tell you that it is to make music for eternity on the new earth for God. Working with fellow Christians and producing incredible songs. I have literally asked for this in prayer before and broke down in tears because of how much this idea makes me happy. I almost never break down during prayer, im just not that type of person. But the idea of doing what I love so much for the Father with my Christian brothers and sisters moves me in such a way that I do actually break down. However, whenever I think of this idea, these sensations come back. Telling me that its not going to happen. Telling me its a fallacy and that I need to let go of the dream. I don't know if these sensations are from God or not so its really messing with my head. I need help, I don't know what to think anymore.

I guess what I am asking is, does God ever talk this way? Is this something God would do?

 

[PinetownTree]

I can't speak to the music portion of this but OCD makes religion tough. You're constantly wondering if it's the Holy Spirit guiding you or just chemicals in your mind causing thoughts you want to be true.

 

[Mari17]

I don't know all the details about how God works, but I do know that OCD is very good at tricking us, including giving us physical sensations, even ones that we don't want to have. I have also been learning, for myself, that feelings are not always reliable. I am still trying to learn discernment, but I have noticed that I tend to read too much into feelings, so I am trying to learn what God's wisdom is like, and asking Him for help in learning discernment.

 

[Robo23]

I am a Christian who believes he is going to heaven by grace through faith in Jesus Christ. But I have struggled with OCD from age 10 or 11 until now at 38. I was officially diagnosed with OCD and now take Fluvoxamine which has really made a difference. Especially early on I had wondered if the thoughts I heard or the strong urges I got were direct communication from God's Holy Spirit. I was very fearful of disobeying/defying the Holy Spirit believing that would prove I was not saved. But God saves by grace and mercy, choosing us from before the creation of the world; not by how well we adhere to the "voice" of the Holy Spirit.
Also, regarding your question, "does God ever talk this way", I listened to a helpful message on Greg Koukl's Stand To Reason program once that addressed hearing the voice of God. He reasoned through examples in scripture why he doesn't believe the claims that people make when they say, “God told me this, that or the other thing.” Or having the idea that the way we have to live our life is: we make decisions by trying to figure out what God is trying to tell us to do.