Not too sure how to proceed with a date

[Jaxon13]

Hey everyone,

I recently joined mostly to get advice on dating. I’ve dated a couple girls here and there but my faith has always kind of caused them to end because I’m religious and they weren’t.

The last couple years I’ve been single and really figuring out what I want and need in my life. Letting God direct my steps and not rushing into anything I may regret.

Eventually, I met this great girl online. She is beautiful, and as I chatted with her, she is so family oriented and focused on God. She lives about 3 hours away from me. At first, I didn’t really think of dating her but as I got to know her I became more and more attracted to her. I asked her if she’d like to meet sometime and she said yes but she owns her own business and getting time off is really difficult. I know for a fact she had a very harsh breakup less than a year ago which she told me she was working on putting herself back together with God’s help.

As we continued to talk for a couple months, I let it slip that I was attracted to her and I would like to date her. She backed away a little bit but was still super nice and never got upset with me. I backed off for awhile because I knew I made her uncomfortable. Eventually I asked again if she’d like to go out and she said she really isn’t looking for a boyfriend right now, that she’s still working on finding herself and wants to just be with Jesus.

I don’t know if I still have a shot with her now. Do I leave her be? Continue to chat with her? Tell her I’m there for her, that I admire her need to find herself and be with Jesus and that I’ll be here when she does?

Any tips are appreciated! Thanks!

 

[Bible Highlighter]

Hey everyone,

I recently joined mostly to get advice on dating. I’ve dated a couple girls here and there but my faith has always kind of caused them to end because I’m religious and they weren’t.

The last couple years I’ve been single and really figuring out what I want and need in my life. Letting God direct my steps and not rushing into anything I may regret.

Eventually, I met this great girl online. She is beautiful, and as I chatted with her, she is so family oriented and focused on God. She lives about 3 hours away from me. At first, I didn’t really think of dating her but as I got to know her I became more and more attracted to her. I asked her if she’d like to meet sometime and she said yes but she owns her own business and getting time off is really difficult. I know for a fact she had a very harsh breakup less than a year ago which she told me she was working on putting herself back together with God’s help.

As we continued to talk for a couple months, I let it slip that I was attracted to her and I would like to date her. She backed away a little bit but was still super nice and never got upset with me. I backed off for awhile because I knew I made her uncomfortable. Eventually I asked again if she’d like to go out and she said she really isn’t looking for a boyfriend right now, that she’s still working on finding herself and wants to just be with Jesus.

I don’t know if I still have a shot with her now. Do I leave her be? Continue to chat with her? Tell her I’m there for her, that I admire her need to find herself and be with Jesus and that I’ll be here when she does?

Any tips are appreciated! Thanks!

Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and all these things will be added unto you. Continue to pray for your soul mate and wait upon the Lord. I prayed for my soul mate when I was 19, and when I was 38 years old, that is when I found my Christian soul mate half way around the world. We dated for about 5 years until we got married. The funny thing is that we wanted to marry each other the first day we met. But we took it slow.

Anyways, the more you are passionate about the things other than her, the more they are interested. The more you want to make them the focus of your happiness, it could scare them. So my encouragement is to seek God with all you got, and let the right woman (whether it be this one or another) come into your life in the Lord's timing.

 

[Valetic]

Hey everyone,

I recently joined mostly to get advice on dating. I’ve dated a couple girls here and there but my faith has always kind of caused them to end because I’m religious and they weren’t.

The last couple years I’ve been single and really figuring out what I want and need in my life. Letting God direct my steps and not rushing into anything I may regret.

Eventually, I met this great girl online. She is beautiful, and as I chatted with her, she is so family oriented and focused on God. She lives about 3 hours away from me. At first, I didn’t really think of dating her but as I got to know her I became more and more attracted to her. I asked her if she’d like to meet sometime and she said yes but she owns her own business and getting time off is really difficult. I know for a fact she had a very harsh breakup less than a year ago which she told me she was working on putting herself back together with God’s help.

As we continued to talk for a couple months, I let it slip that I was attracted to her and I would like to date her. She backed away a little bit but was still super nice and never got upset with me. I backed off for awhile because I knew I made her uncomfortable. Eventually I asked again if she’d like to go out and she said she really isn’t looking for a boyfriend right now, that she’s still working on finding herself and wants to just be with Jesus.

I don’t know if I still have a shot with her now. Do I leave her be? Continue to chat with her? Tell her I’m there for her, that I admire her need to find herself and be with Jesus and that I’ll be here when she does?

Any tips are appreciated! Thanks!

Sounds like this one is done in. I know you were friends and everything but since you developed feelings for her the relationship is no longer purely platonic and she is aware of this now and if she wants to have anything more to do with you she will probably need to be the one to reach out to you. You already made it clear to her you developed feelings for her and now she has the responsibility of responding to those feelings. She obviously didn't reciprocate them the way you had hoped, so this is why I say it sounds like it is done in. I wouldn't see the point in continuing the relationship based on the information you have given here, except from a distance, as it might only make you wish you had her more, or you or both of you might end up more hurt over it.

 

[Jaxon13]

Thanks, I know this is God's timing and I need to wait on this and not rush things. Sometimes I just worry that someone else will realize how amazing she is in the time I am letting her come around.

Even when I have been forward with her about everything, she is still incredibly friendly. I told her that I understand that she's not ready and I didn't want to push her into anything. She laughed it off and told me not to worry about it. I truly believe that she is just finding out what she wants in life. She spends so much time with her family and posts a lot of motivational and religious articles on social media.

I shall give it time, pray and not push her and just see how things go I guess. Nothing I can really do now that she knows how I feel.

 

[keith99]

You should already know some of the things she likes. Pick one or two and ask her to share some time with you doing one of them. The LESS it seems like a traditional dinner and a movie date the better. An afternoon at the botanical gardens or an evening at a Hockey game either work just fine. as long as they are something she likes. (well Hockey will have to wait for a little while).