centos 4 is nice, easy install. ubuntu's ok, and i like red hat. havent tried gentoo, tried debian but didnt get too far =)
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- Thread starter ILoveYeshua
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i think its interesting how the conversation evolved into, and excuse my paraphrasing, 'well it must be cuz youre messed up and she ran like hell'
well, i wanted input from the outside world, and i got it.
and yknow, its probly true enough.
well, i wanted input from the outside world, and i got it.
and yknow, its probly true enough.
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and i wonder what will happen if she one day peruses upon this thread and reads it. i can only imagine. or i could sabotage myself like usual and send her a link to this thread. that'd be sure to shoot myself in the foot.
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for all the people who tell me i have issues, no one ever suggests how to get RID of those issues. personally i thought Jesus could get rid of those issues. yet, i still have my issues.
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or maybe i dont have any issues, and the world is just messed up, and i'm just reacting to how its reacted to me. hmm
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regardless, i doubt there are very many people posting 150 posts to themselves. not that it matters
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*sigh* It's not that we're saying you're so totally messed up that women don't want you. It's just that it's one possibility that was suggested that you're bringing baggage into the relationship.
Oftentimes in my relationships (with not only my husband but my dear friends), when I have problems with them, I'll stop placing blame on them and look to see what *I* am doing. Am I part of the blame? Is there something I could be doing differently? What would work better? How can I help the situation?
Maybe those are questions you could ask yourself?
We ALL have issues. Every single one of us. It's just that our issues can either divide us or bring us together. A lot of times they are divisive so we need to see how our issues are effecting others and how we can bring about some sort of compromise for change (for the better).
You want help on getting RID of your issues? Well, not all issues can be gotten rid of totally, but they can be managed up to a point.
What issues would you like help with? We can't help you with your lovelife. But if there is something you think an outsider could help you with, there are people who do care and would like to offer help.
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C.F.W. Walther
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LilLamb219 said:
Or you could run away like I did years ago, be a biker and stomp some butt. Anger management
WHen I came ack to sanity I still had the same issues but I felt better LOLDId that help anything?--probably not-----probably made it worse.
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youre doin fine =) sometimes its nice just to know that someone else exists and cares, even if they cant make a lick of difference in the grand scheme of things.
but the thing is, you can make a lick of difference. you can do 3 things.
1. pray the Lord's prayer verbatim.
2. pray that he will fix my problems
3. pray that he will provide a wife for me whom i will love, ideally this person i'm already thinking of, but whatever he wants.
but the thing is, you can make a lick of difference. you can do 3 things.
1. pray the Lord's prayer verbatim.
2. pray that he will fix my problems
3. pray that he will provide a wife for me whom i will love, ideally this person i'm already thinking of, but whatever he wants.
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> *sigh*
i can sense your frustration. i too am frustrated, tho not with you, so no worries there.
> It's not that we're saying you're so totally messed up that women don't want you.
i know. if someone said that on this board, i'd be shocked and appalled. but we all have our euphamisms. nevertheless, its not like i havent openly admitted to having issues, so i apologize for giving anyone a hard time about that. a lot of time, i'm just lost in my own mindthought. its hard to break out.
> It's just that it's one possibility that was suggested that you're bringing baggage into the relationship.
i mean, i wouldn't date me, so why should anyone? because it would be nice. i felt a relationship based in Christ with her would be perfect. she is so accepting of me. its like.... amazing. i cant even describe how wonderful she is to me to y'all. i just wish she could be my wife, and that seems to not be happening.
> Oftentimes in my relationships (with not only my husband but my dear friends), when I have problems with them, I'll stop placing blame on them and look to see what *I* am doing. Am I part of the blame? Is there something I could be doing differently? What would work better? How can I help the situation?
true. and thats always hard. cuz i know a lot of my messups but i just ignore them. its hard to care anymore. i mean, see the title of the thread. i'm not really all that indifferent, but im not ambitious. i just dont see the point most days.
> Maybe those are questions you could ask yourself?
only if you ask yourself those qustions too!
> We ALL have issues. Every single one of us. It's just that our issues can either divide us or bring us together. A lot of times they are divisive so we need to see how our issues are effecting others and how we can bring about some sort of compromise for change (for the better).
hmm. what are issues that bring us together/
> You want help on getting RID of your issues? Well, not all issues can be gotten rid of totally, but they can be managed up to a point.
... managed?
the way i try to manage my issues is by keeping my mouth shut. one big issue i have is foolishness, and proverbs' advice for the fool is to shut up. i try.
but i wonder if the way i've managed my issues with respect to her hass not been adequate enough to win her admiration.
highly likely. i'm very inadequate.
> What issues would you like help with? We can't help you with your lovelife. But if there is something you think an outsider could help you with, there are people who do care and would like to offer help.
lol where to start?
and yes, you are helping me with my lovelife, simply by talking about it. even if it may seem harsh or obvious to me or whatever, and even if i am reactin, i dunno, like a wounded animal, i'm still benefitting from your attention. thank you.
i can sense your frustration. i too am frustrated, tho not with you, so no worries there.
> It's not that we're saying you're so totally messed up that women don't want you.
i know. if someone said that on this board, i'd be shocked and appalled. but we all have our euphamisms. nevertheless, its not like i havent openly admitted to having issues, so i apologize for giving anyone a hard time about that. a lot of time, i'm just lost in my own mindthought. its hard to break out.
> It's just that it's one possibility that was suggested that you're bringing baggage into the relationship.
i mean, i wouldn't date me, so why should anyone? because it would be nice. i felt a relationship based in Christ with her would be perfect. she is so accepting of me. its like.... amazing. i cant even describe how wonderful she is to me to y'all. i just wish she could be my wife, and that seems to not be happening.
> Oftentimes in my relationships (with not only my husband but my dear friends), when I have problems with them, I'll stop placing blame on them and look to see what *I* am doing. Am I part of the blame? Is there something I could be doing differently? What would work better? How can I help the situation?
true. and thats always hard. cuz i know a lot of my messups but i just ignore them. its hard to care anymore. i mean, see the title of the thread. i'm not really all that indifferent, but im not ambitious. i just dont see the point most days.
> Maybe those are questions you could ask yourself?
only if you ask yourself those qustions too!
> We ALL have issues. Every single one of us. It's just that our issues can either divide us or bring us together. A lot of times they are divisive so we need to see how our issues are effecting others and how we can bring about some sort of compromise for change (for the better).
hmm. what are issues that bring us together/
> You want help on getting RID of your issues? Well, not all issues can be gotten rid of totally, but they can be managed up to a point.
... managed?
the way i try to manage my issues is by keeping my mouth shut. one big issue i have is foolishness, and proverbs' advice for the fool is to shut up. i try.
but i wonder if the way i've managed my issues with respect to her hass not been adequate enough to win her admiration.
highly likely. i'm very inadequate.
> What issues would you like help with? We can't help you with your lovelife. But if there is something you think an outsider could help you with, there are people who do care and would like to offer help.
lol where to start?
and yes, you are helping me with my lovelife, simply by talking about it. even if it may seem harsh or obvious to me or whatever, and even if i am reactin, i dunno, like a wounded animal, i'm still benefitting from your attention. thank you.
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but inevitably, once this conversation/thread plays out, you'll all just go back to your lives like i dont even exist. a project completed or not. a soul saved or not. and if that doesnt describe you then i encourage you to show forth fruits of love and continue to at least make believe i exist for a few days longer than you might normally dismiss a stranger.
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we try to patch something up and send it on its way, but christ says "follow me". he wants you to stay with him, even though he has things to do, so his only recourse is to have you follow him. that requires denying ourself tho
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well, soon i'll go home, and the rest of this scenario will play out. will she change her mind and say yes? will she continue to be my best friend? will she turn tail and flee? stay tuned for the exciting conclusion of, a day in the life of a messed up 26y old romantic.
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Weight loss can bring people together as they strive to eat healthier. My neighbor is in weight watchers and has a great time at the meetings!!!
There are other examples, but sometimes our issues helps us bond with others. That's what I meant by issues bringing people together. We find like-minded people with whom we can work things through.
From reading a lot of your postings today I've discovered that you don't feel you have a lot of self-worth. You belittle yourself constantly. You are extremely negative in your outlook about who you are. Your friend has given you many compliments on your character, but you don't believe those compliments, do you? I mean, you think it's great that she believes those things, but you are so into thinking that no one cares, loves you, or wants to even be near you that you cannot possibly believe there is anything good about yourself. At least, that's the image you've portrayed here today. Maybe it's just because you're down in the dumps today that this is what is being communicated. Maybe you don't always feel that way about yourself. I don't know.
I know I tend to pick on myself when I'm feeling poorly. Is that what you're doing to yourself? Or are you always so hard on yourself?
It's ok to ask for someone to be your friend here in this forum
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KagomeShuko
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"I wouldn't date myself."
How can you expect anybody to want to date you with that attitude? Would you be your own friend?
Everybody has their own issues.
Did you ever even "date" or was this friends and you suddenly asked her to marry you? That would be too sudden for me from a guy I'd chat with on the Internet. I'd be shocked and probably not even handle it as well as she did with you.
As for the issues, have you talked with a counselor or doctor? My mom has mild depression and the little bit of paxil helps her TONS. She would just go talk about her life about once a month and it really helped.
We all go through it. I don't think men should have to be tough at all. I think more men need to express their feelings than hold them back.
I think you need to take time.
Don't pray things like, "Lord, please change her heart." Pray things like, "Lord, please let me see Your plan."
We do care about you.
How can you expect anybody to want to date you with that attitude? Would you be your own friend?
Everybody has their own issues.
Did you ever even "date" or was this friends and you suddenly asked her to marry you? That would be too sudden for me from a guy I'd chat with on the Internet. I'd be shocked and probably not even handle it as well as she did with you.
As for the issues, have you talked with a counselor or doctor? My mom has mild depression and the little bit of paxil helps her TONS. She would just go talk about her life about once a month and it really helped.
We all go through it. I don't think men should have to be tough at all. I think more men need to express their feelings than hold them back.
I think you need to take time.
Don't pray things like, "Lord, please change her heart." Pray things like, "Lord, please let me see Your plan."
We do care about you.
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Flatscan82
Active Member
ILoveYeshua said:
I bet if you put all that time into praying to get something and then put that time and effort into working to get what you wanted i am sure you would have it by now.
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