Not sure what I need

[macspetra]

I'm not sure if want advice or what I am really looking for. I'm frustated - my two brothers are not Christian. They came for a visit and they really offended me by being really crude and (at least what I thought) really disrespectful to me. They told my mom that they were trying to loosen me up. A discusion about sex has never loosened me up even before I was a Christian so I don't know why they would think that now. I think that it has really blown me away how much they just didn't seemto have a clue about me at all. I know I got really moody and short-tempered with them during their visit. The one day I knew it was because I was short on sleep, but they just seemed to keep aggravating it.

On one hand I was thinking that maybe God is preparing me for a time that I will be moving much farther away form them. On the other hand I just feel heavy with frustration because now they think that Christianity is boring and something they would never be interested in because they say I don' t know how to have fun and I'm too moody. Now I think that I really screwed up big time.

Like I said I'm not sure what I'm looking for, but maybe it will help just trying to write it out - thanks for listening.

 

[rogsr]

Hello,
We must always be prepared to face persecution. In the days of old thousands of us were nailed to crosses on all the roads that led to Rome--literally. Don't be afraid of it at all, you are one with Christ, our Lord and Brother, and you will never taste the bitterness of death.

Also, don't feel obligated to make the faith seem "fun." If a mature adult can not see the profound truth in Christianity for themselves, at least a little, then that is their choice. Just love them as best as you can and pray often for them. Maybe in a few years they too will boring bible thumpers like us

Love and patience is the key. Love God and love your neighbors, and at the same time, be patient with God and patient with your neighbors. If you just focus on that then you will have the most valuable thing in the world by anyones standard--a contented mind.

Peace-

 

[macspetra]

Thanks. I was just preparing for a Bible study about the faith of Abraham and was looking at how God had asked him to sacrifice Isaac. It made me think that sometimes we are asked to give up things that mean the most to us (even gifts from God) when we hold onto them too tight instead of holding onto God's promise.
For me it's too easy to look at my mistakes and hold onto them instead of learning and letting go even though I know that if I let go I can become stringer through God.
Moving bibllical truths form our head to our hearts - now that is an interesting struggle - at least for me.
Peace with you

 

[Bizzlebin Imperatoris]

Well, I would at least try to help them see the fun. It may very well be that they don't see it, as opposed to won't see it. Get them to hang out with some Christian brothers, at a movie or something similar.

 

[macspetra]

Well, I would at least try to help them see the fun. It may very well be that they don't see it, as opposed to won't see it. Get them to hang out with some Christian brothers, at a movie or something similar.

Well we did go to a movie - but I watch the types of movies that I watch. My younger brother is into movies like "Anchorman" and I would be totally disgusted if I watched it. I can't even stand watching the commercials.

I have been trying to think of Christian events that I could invite them to - but most events I know about are at my college and most of those are directed toward high schoolers - you need special permission to invite someone out of high school. I know that this is an area my college is lacking.

thinking - I should talk to someone this year and see if we oculd get something goiing - any questions?

 

[Firefly]

Your brothers might have deeper respect for you than you know. Or even
they know. Or they might be at that age where they'd never show it anyways.

One thing I've noticed with my younger non-Christian family members is
they might make fun of me sometimes, but they are sure watching me very
intently. Who knows what spiritual breakthroughs your siblings are headed
for..and it all might start with your good example.

peace,
firefly

 

[Daughter of His]

Persecution from family members is especially tough to take. One thing for sure they are watching us. They see us to mess up and then talk about it because they are so suprised. I know because last year I told a joke that I shouldn't have and it was definately noticed and it was just slightly inappropriate. You let your light shine by being yourself. When I'm going to be around "those" family members I pray first. Even though they can be crude and offensive, with Christ in their life, they woud be different. So, we need to pray for God to draw and save them and use us in the meantime. May God bless your efforts.

 

[desi]

Don't worry about it. People say all kinds of things for many reasons. They were probably trying to get a rise out of you.

 

[macspetra]

When I'm going to be around "those" family members I pray first. Even though they can be crude and offensive, with Christ in their life, they woud be different. So, we need to pray for God to draw and save them and use us in the meantime. May God bless your efforts.

I know that was a big mistake that I made this past weekend with my brothers. I never sat down with God and asked Him for His help. My communication with God really dropped off. I never thought of asking for God's protection to be around my family - just seems wierd that protection is needed for your family. I just remembered that those areas in your life that you think are the strongest or the safest - that's where we let our guard down and then Satan attacks and knocks us down. You can never be too careful.

 

[Bizzlebin Imperatoris]

Very true macspectra. When you fight a war, you go for any weakness, ESPECIALLY if the enemy thinks it is a strength. Almost nothing else is so demoralizing, so hang on!

 

[macspetra]

Your brothers might have deeper respect for you than you know. Or even
they know. Or they might be at that age where they'd never show it anyways.

That is something I never really thought of before. My brothers might have respect for me. I was thinking the other night - when the three of us were living in the same city for a few years - I was always known as John's sister then as Torval's sister. I don't think that I was ever introduced without the "This is my sister ..." or "This is ___'s sister ..." Now that I'm livingin a different city and going to a completely different college - I have my own life - I've had to make it on my own without them there.
I don't need to be lost in the background because I'm the middle child. I am my own person. LOL

I should probably go back to work, but having these little revelations is so much fun and quite interesting.

 

[wayfaring man]

Hi mac ,

Our own families , and those who have known us a long time , are the hardest people to witness to ---

Jesus said unto them, A prophet is not without honour, but in his own country, and among his own kin, and in his own house.
And he could there do no mighty work, save that he laid his hands upon a few sick folk, and healed them.
And he marvelled because of their unbelief. <-----> Mark 6:4-6

But God has a plan for us that fixes this :

If we stop obsessing over the me and the mine , and go forth seeking the stanger and the pilgrim , someone else's brother or sister or father or mother ;( who they could not effectively witness to ) , and who will be more readily reached and persuaded by you , and the witness God has given you in Christ .

If we all do this together , someone will reach out also , to those close to you in one sense , but light years away , in the Way that matters most .

And so , once again , we see that Charity " snuffs out " selfishness " hands down " !


Praise Jesus !!!

wm

 

[macspetra]

Our own families , and those who have known us a long time , are the hardest people to witness to ---
If we all do this together , someone will reach out also , to those close to you in one sense , but light years away , in the Way that matters most .

That is so true. When my dad left, my mom had mentioned that if I wanted to go into counselling (which is something I'm thinking about) that I was doing the hardest counselling - since I am pretty much trying to counsel my own mother. If nothing else I try to walk beside her as much as possible.
It is so hard to minister to family because they know you and don't always see the change that someone else may see. It is such a danger that we become so focused on our own world that we miss what's going on every where else. I know that I have had to give my father over into God's hands because I did every thing that I could ever do without making the decision for him- and I tried doing that too. Only God can reach him. I guess I need to remember to pray for my brothers as well - letting them go, because its out of my hands. Only God knows how to reach them - and yeah - I do believe that its not going to be through me that God reaches them.
Thank you for your encouragement.

 

[wayfaring man]

You're most welcome mac ,

By availing myself to the aiding of others , I find such wonderful , untargeted help comes to me in my own trials and tribulations .

Thankyou Lord for your spirit of wisdom and charity .

Amen .


wm

 

[TheMainException]

It's good to write it out, venting, as I call it...I'm glad you did, and this was the right place and the right way. Dear Methodist Sister of mine...I'm going to tell you something that can't just happen, that only Christ can accomplish, but that you need to ask for. LOVE...it's so hard...It's really tough to love like Christ loved, but if you ask God, eventually you will be a love machine (don't take that the wrong way) and will be loving like Christ loved...that doesn't mean that you won't get angry now and again...keep trying to love them...the fact that you are trying means a lot, know you need to give that up to God and ask him to love through you...keep trying...with love, Lauren

 

[macspetra]

This weekend is the 6 month anniversary of when my dad left my mom and family for someone else. I found out this summer that when you grieve the loss of someone in your life that there are certain times when it becomes the hardest. It is usually every 6 months. I spent yesterday just wandering around and I realized that I was still in great mourning for my dad. To make matters worse there's a guy that has been spending alot of time with my mom, he has intentions of going out with her - he has a past of not being nice to me or my mom. (just being mostly a rude jerk) I told mom that I felt like the only reason that he was being nice to me was because he wanted to go out for her.
I guess what I need to get off my chest is that yesterday trying to overcome overwhelming feelings of abandonment. I feel completely abandoned by my dad and now my mom because this guy spent most of the weekend with her. My relationship history is making me feel that noone wants me around and I feel completely worthless. This is all coming on after I was given a farewell party at my summer job - where I was wanted.
I know that God says that he will never leave me or forsake me - I have a tendency to not believe him - I can't trust anyone else to follow through on their promises so why would God care about me? I just can't seem to get my head knowledge into my heart.
AND my dad phoned after not phoning for the past month - wondering where I am. I don't know what to say to him and I really don't want to talk to his girlfriend even if its just her answering the phone.
Pray for me please.

 

[wayfaring man]

Hello again mac ,

Sorry for your sorrow .

I know it sounds rather quaint , but it really does work - " Find someone you can assist / minister to whose got it worse than you ".

And the grace which God will pour out to enable you to serve another in need , will spill over into your own troubled life , with more volumne and potency than could ever be obtained through seeking the Lord for our own troubles' sake .

...Above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness. <-----> Colassians 3:14

...Above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins. <-----> 1st Peter 4:8

Praying and Praising ,

wm

 

[macspetra]

At church the other night, the speaker talked about Romans 7. He discussed how we don't always live out lives with Christ as the center. We focus on the dos and don'ts - we give ourselves rules to live by and make them so rigid that God can't use us. When we focus on something else we blur our view of Christ.
This is really making me think - am I so focused on what I can or can't do, or what I can or can't feel that I forget that its all about Jesus. I was going through some stuff of mine and I came across a thought I wrote down once
we forget to make time for Jesus. OUr lives get too busy.
I've been reading other threads here and some thoughts of some of my friends and I need to confess. I have been reminded that the simplest and most unglamorous job should still be done for God. I say that I am a CHristian, but when I look at my life - Am I really living for Christ? That's probably why I am having such a hard time right now, I'm not staying focuse don God for evrything. I want my purpose to happen and I'm not focused on God's purpose. I have a dream in my heart, but I look to how it will affect me - not how it can accomplish God's purpose. Much can be done for God's kingdom through this dream, but I don't have the right motives. I guess my sinful nature just gets the best of me - I get frustrated I just want to give up and quit because I can never get it right. These feelings overwhelm me in so many parts of my life. And I just let infect the rest of my life - to me it seems like there is no point of trying because I won't get it right anyways. There are so many times when I just want to cry - no wonder my family calls me so moody.
The worse thing is I keep thinking the worse about everyone's actions. Especialy with my mom. My dad left and I keep thinking that my mom is going to abandon me too because she has a new male interest in her life. I think one thing - like she prefers his company to mine all the time, not just even some of the time - and she still waits for me to call like I ususally do.
I want these feelings to go away, but they seem to hit me even harder.
I just don't get it.

 

[cynjo59]

I have two sons and four daughters. The daughters are saved, the sons are not. They both have unsaved girlfriends who definitely do not dress or act like my daughters. Both boys pick on their sisters unmercifully, making fun of their dress, their long hair, etc... but I have noticed that they do not pick on them about their standards of purity. And that is because, deep down, and although they would never admit it, they RESPECT their sisters. I'm sure your brothers respect you, too. I also have noticed that while the brothers can pick on their sisters, they will not stand by and let someone outside the family pick on them. It could be that your being a Christian makes your brothers more and uncomfortably aware of their unsaved state. And acting the way they do could be their way of disguising their discomfort. Just keep on praying for them and living for God the way you are. They are watching even when they are laughing at you and teasing you.

 

[Bizzlebin Imperatoris]

we forget to make time for Jesus. OUr lives get too busy.
I've been reading other threads here and some thoughts of some of my friends and I need to confess. I have been reminded that the simplest and most unglamorous job should still be done for God. I say that I am a CHristian, but when I look at my life - Am I really living for Christ? That's probably why I am having such a hard time right now, I'm not staying focuse don God for evrything.

Never forget this, EVER. If there is some "secret" to Christianity, this is it. Few people actually live for Christ anymore. Keep Christ at the center, and you will have your entire life and doctrine in line