New gf

[Chadwickboy]

I just recently got a new gf, we've been together for about a week and a half. We are both pro-abstinence concerning actual intercourse, but she eventually wants to go farther sexually in other ways than I feel comfortable with right now. What are some of your opinions on this? Also, are there any suggestions as to things we can do to keep our relationship fun, intimate, and exciting, and not become dull, without going 'too far'? I'm kinda new on the whole dating thing lol.

 

[Kepa]

Is she a Christian? If she is, show her how we are called to not be sexually immoral.
If she's not a Christian, then what are you doing dating her?
2 Corinthians 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

 

[flounder7786]

wow...well umm, thats tough. I would talk to her though...i mean, honesltly, to build a relationship you are gonna want to talk occasionally anyway...JUST KIDDING...thats like, THE most important thing!!!! so talk to her, tell her that you are uncomfortable about the whole going futher sexually thing...and just set boundaries early. Sit down together and talk about how far you and her are willing to go, and do not be persuaded to go any further in the future...

To keep things interesting and stuff, do cute little things, suprise her with flowers, go out to dinner...make something for her...drink hot chocolate together...make food together...you guys have only been going out for a few weeks, it should still have spice and stuff, hehe...it gets even harder when you've passed the year mark!!!

 

[MagicStar723]

Make sure she knows where you stand. Talk about NOW before you get in the situation. Is she a Christian?

 

[Inperfected]

Don't allow anything more than you are happy, concencously happy with. Also get invovled in doing comunity stuff together...

 

[RED that's ME]

The Bible is clear for a christian what is acceptable and not acceptable in a relationship. With you saying you have only been dating for a couple of weeks you don't really know her and you need to develop the friendship part of your relationship and stay away from anything that God intended for marriage. Don't put yourself in situations where it will be easy to stumble.

Here are some verses that might help you....
Psalm 139:23-24--"Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me, and know my thoughts; and see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." Guard and guide the heart--the mind.

Proverbs 4:23--"Keep [or `guard'] thy heart [or `mind'] with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life." If you want to control life, guard your mind and don't let anybody short-circuit it.

Matthew 15:19--"For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies." So, not only do all good things come out of the thinking process, all bad things come out of the thinking process as well. So the Bible tells us to guard our thinking process.


[font=verdana, geneva, helvetica]Philip. 4: 8, "Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things."

[/font]"But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people." (Ephesians 5:3)

"Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body." (1 Corinthians 6:18-20)
"Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman [or, "It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman," according to the NIV footnote]. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband." (1 Corinthians 7:1-2, KJV)

 

[boilerblues]

There's a book called "Boundries in Dating", it's been a while since I read it, but it may be worth checking it out. But I'll ask this, if she's wanting to push boundries that you are uncomfortable with is this the character you are looking for in a woman? Talk with her and set boundries that honor God and each other. If she has a problem with it then I recommend you move on.

 

[sad_josie]

you sound like a beautiful guy, don't let her muck that up...

JOSIE

 

[HumbleBee]

I just recently got a new gf, we've been together for about a week and a half.

Together for LESS than 2 weeks and already tiz talk of going farther s*xually in other ways

Words of wisdom and admonishment would be, as they say: WHOA NELLIE! SLOWWWWWWWWW DOWN! How well do you even know each other? As I have said in another young dude's thread, tell your new gf that you are a Christian man of moral principles!

1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God...

1 Timothy 4:12 ...set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.

2 Timothy 2:22 Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.

 

[tamtam92]

Together for LESS than 2 weeks and already tiz talk of going farther s*xually in other ways

Words of wisdom and admonishment would be, as they say: WHOA NELLIE! SLOWWWWWWWWW DOWN! How well do you even know each other? As I have said in another young dude's thread, tell your new gf that you are a Christian man of moral principles!

1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God...

1 Timothy 4:12 ...set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.

2 Timothy 2:22 Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.

yep she's right !

 

[Chadwickboy]

Well, just to let you guys know, we broke up awhile back. We actually didn't last much longer than that week and a half, I've just been busy at school. She has SO MANY issues... she wanted to go too far sexually, and ended up she's basically looking for what she had in a past relationship, and then moving on if she doesn't get it when she wants it. I felt so stupid for even dating her. Sadly, I think it was one of those cases where I dated and liked her simply because I knew for a fact that she would date me, and I had that need for acceptance from someone and ended up turning to the wrong one. Oh well, live and learn, I guess.

 

[barefeetonholyground]

If you aren't comfortable with it don't do it. Tension can cause the hormones to race and both of you could end up going a lot further than you want to.

 

[Inperfected]

My opinion mate... be sooo careful. Don't hurt yourself. By going after girls for acceptance you are only getting hurt... When you go after girls you wanna be sure you are going after them for love and not purely for acceptance or any other reasons... Bu you also need to be sure of what god would say ok...