New Creation?

[Meshavrischika]

So... God's practically running me over with information and change in the past six months (I don't mean this in a negative way, I just feel SO MUCH has happened that I am floored by the whole thing).

Anyway...

God has put upon me that I should learn to love myself, being as I am a part of Him, and that I and my self hate is holding me back.... That I depend too much on the thoughts of others and the desire to be approved of by others (and not just me and God). This (along with an earlier revelation that I tend to lie to myself) led me to ponder who I am and to realize I've spent my whole life allowing people to speak things into me (say that I am this or that) and I've taken those things and made them real in my life. So I'm at a point where I realize that the majority of what I think of as myself is just a lie (me convincing myself that everyone else is right and living that way). I'm at this point where I have no idea who the heck I am at all (not that I'm sure it matters). I feel.... lost now.

I'm sure this has something to do with a re-formation of who I am in God as he has been molding me so much recently. I'm just not sure what to do with it. I am spending today just being... KWIM? I have lost all my self condemning thoughts (which used to occupy most of my mental time) and so I am just here... working, living, but not really who I was yesterday.

I know all this sounds bizarre... I was just hoping someone could provide me with some encouragement/advice/information or their own experience.

I feel like all this has happened to me and that I have stumbled upon it more than finding it or being led to it, though a friend of mine assures me that somehow I am seeking it out. I have this fear of missing my turn on this road (especially at this place where I am pretty much feeling like a shell of a person).

 

[favored_one]

I too am learning to see myself as God sees me. I have my good days and my bad, but I have realized the cause of my bad. It is such a sensitive spiritual time for me now, that I MUST stay focused on Christ. It seems to me that if I slip just a little, I get very distracted and ultimately depressed.

Looks like we'll be going through this together...

 

[Meshavrischika]

I too am learning to see myself as God sees me. I have my good days and my bad, but I have realized the cause of my bad. It is such a sensitive spiritual time for me now, that I MUST stay focused on Christ. It seems to me that if I slip just a little, I get very distracted and ultimately depressed.

Looks like we'll be going through this together...

nice to know i'm not alone.

what do you struggle with? do you self-condemn? that's what I do. I also let people say "you're lazy, you're selfish.." and make them real because I don't know how not to internalize that kind of thing.

 

[favored_one]

I have struggled with self-esteem, over eating, depression all gift wrapped in PRIDE! I used to always want people to prefer me and cared so much what they thought of me till it paralyzed me. Through much prayer and focusing on Jesus, I am getting over this because I see that it is the enemy trying to silence my testimony of Jesus Christ.

 

[Shulamite]

Hi

I'm glad you shared your heart and what you are feeling/experiencing.
You are not alone.
The Lord delivered me from years' worth of low self esteem and feeling like I had no worth or meaning. I grew up in a very emotionally controlling environment and even the early years of my marriage were very difficult. I learned to internalize every word someone said to me. I feel it's satan's way of attack.

The Lord said that we are "bone of His bone and flesh of His flesh", We are "co-heirs together with Christ" and "heirs of God". Paul, in the scriptures, stated that he was judged by NO MAN and didn't even judge himself! Wow! "Judge nothing until the appointed time" the scripture says. ( I want to look all of these up for you).

You are who the Lord says you are, not what "man" thinks of you. That doesn't mean we cannot grow from what other try to show us or teach us or correct us with, but that ultimately the judgement of "man" and their remarks are NOT who we are. Yeshua's opinion (Jesus' opinion) is the only one that matters about you.

If your worth and value are wrapped up in "other people", you will never have peace. I used to live that way. I could never please my mother, I could never please my earthly spouse, and so on and my judgement of myself was so bad, that if the Lord didnt come in and rescue me and romance me to Himself as my Bridegroom, I would not be here today. That's how bad the depression was for me (years ago).

Now I live in the deepest intimacy with Yeshua! He gets the credit for this. The love, closeness and tender things He and I share has SET ME FREE.

I pray the same for you.

 

[Shulamite]

Here are those scriptures (1 Corinthians 4:3-4) that I was telling you about up above, along with a devotional I found online. Hope it helps!

Human Judgment​

1 Corinthians 4:3-4​

As an old schoolteacher I can tell you that one of the strongest motivations in young people's lives is the desire to be accepted by their peers. Usually, young folks will do just about anything to accommodate their friends! They will wear the same brand of shirt or shoe to fit in with their buddies and win their approval. No one enjoys the feeling of rejection. When your classmates like you, and you like yourself, all seems right with the world.

Our feelings do not change very much as we age. We still want to feel good about ourselves and have others feel good about us as well. These are very natural emotions and usually there is no harm as long as we remember that human approval is not the standard by which God judges us! The danger comes when we begin to imagine that man's acceptance guarantees our Creator's approval. Now we are talking about some-thing that is far more important than which brand of clothing we choose to wear.

The apostle Paul writes of this point in I Corinthians 4:3-4: "But with me it is a very small thing that I should be judged of you, or of man's judgment: yea, I judge not mine own self. For I know nothing by myself; yet am I not hereby justified: but he that judgeth me is the Lord" (KJV). Simply put, Paul says it is a relatively insignificant thing to be judged by other men or by oneself. The fact that others think he is right or wrong, or that his own conscience is clear, matters little. Humans do not establish the standard of eternal judgment; the Lord does.

"Therefore let no man glory in men," Paul writes in 3:21, and that would include glorying in man's acceptance or approval.

There are three points that naturally follow from Paul's admonition.

First, man's acceptance or rejection of me should not dominate my thinking. Remember Paul's words in v. 3: "But to me it is a very small thing that I should be examined by you, or by any human court; in fact, I do not even examine myself" (NASB). At first one might be tempted to ask, "Doesn't Paul contradict himself, because, in 2 Cor. 13:5, he writes, "Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith; prove your own selves"? (KJV). The point is, Paul is unwilling to be judged by any human standard, whether it is his human standard, or someone else's. Yes, we must evaluate ourselves by the gospel to see if we are being obedient to the faith. That is, we must examine ourselves in light of the Word. We dare not, however, substitute human approval in place of that Word!

Human acceptance, apart from Scripture, is useless from a spiritual standpoint. As humans, outward appearances or demonstrations of earthly wisdom easily influence us. We accept the fellow who wears the nicest suits, or we enjoy the lady with the most pleasing social grace. We approve of the preacher who tells the funniest stories or who makes us feel the most comfortable. Often, we accept the fellow who tells us we're just fine the way we are or who massages our egos the most.

Paul reminds us that Christians should not be motivated by an overwhelming desire to be popular with men. Our hearts should be set on living our lives acceptably before God.
Finally, Paul reminds us that there will be a final judgment by the Lord. What matters, therefore, is God's reckoning, not man's. The apostle is not worried about being a man-pleaser because man is not the one who will determine his final destiny. In fact, in Gal. 1:10 Paul writes, "For do I now persuade men, or God? Or do I seek to please men? For if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of Christ."
I Cor. 4:4-5 reminds the Christian that the Lord, not man, judges us. It also warns us that a clear conscience or ignorance is no justification for sin. Finally, we remember that one can be popular on earth and still miss heaven.
​

 

[favored_one]

Hi

I'm glad you shared your heart and what you are feeling/experiencing.
You are not alone.
The Lord delivered me from years' worth of low self esteem and feeling like I had no worth or meaning. I grew up in a very emotionally controlling environment and even the early years of my marriage were very difficult. I learned to internalize every word someone said to me. I feel it's satan's way of attack.

The Lord said that we are "bone of His bone and flesh of His flesh", We are "co-heirs together with Christ" and "heirs of God". Paul, in the scriptures, stated that he was judged by NO MAN and didn't even judge himself! Wow! "Judge nothing until the appointed time" the scripture says. ( I want to look all of these up for you).

You are who the Lord says you are, not what "man" thinks of you. That doesn't mean we cannot grow from what other try to show us or teach us or correct us with, but that ultimately the judgement of "man" and their remarks are NOT who we are. Yeshua's opinion (Jesus' opinion) is the only one that matters about you.

If your worth and value are wrapped up in "other people", you will never have peace. I used to live that way. I could never please my mother, I could never please my earthly spouse, and so on and my judgement of myself was so bad, that if the Lord didnt come in and rescue me and romance me to Himself as my Bridegroom, I would not be here today. That's how bad the depression was for me (years ago).

Now I live in the deepest intimacy with Yeshua! He gets the credit for this. The love, closeness and tender things He and I share has SET ME FREE.

I pray the same for you.

Thank you for this! Sometimes it can be even more frustrating because I know that I am allowing what others think of me to affect me. The more I seek after Yeshua, these feelings diminish. Shulamite, I am glad you came here. Your message has been so simple...the love of Jesus...but it has helped me in so many ways.

I believe that Elsa and I are right in the place that God is using some of the posters here to help bring us out of this fog where the enemy has lied to us for so long. That's what it's all about...helping one another!

 

[Meshavrischika]

thank you everyone. this has all been so... great and helpful to me.

 

[JPPT1974]

I have struggled with self-esteem,
Self-worth, and self-discipline as
Really I was doing it on my own
But three years ago, only began to realize
The Lord nagging at me to depend on Him
Not my own strength but His strength!
He was really helpful in doing that and now
Really I just rely on Him and Him alone.
Despite having cravings of going on my own
God is there for and with me.