Need To Finally Face This

[Finch09]

Hi. I've struggled for years with this and haven't really gotten it off my chest yet. I made a horrible mistake. Not sure I want to explain it fully to a billion users on the internet, but I made a really, really bad mistake. Repeatedly. The end result is that I can't have sex, or get married, or have children, or have a "normal" family life when I grow up.

Pretty bad, huh? I know that it's my fault. And it's pretty horrible.

Emotionally I'm still trying to process this, after years. It hasn't gotten through my brain to the point where I've completely accepted it. Especially now that there's a really great guy in my life who I like, and who likes me as well. He's a Christian and whoever marries him some day sure will be a lucky girl. It's hard to see so many other people my age starting to date and think about possibilities for their futures. It's not that I don't have a future or good things ahead; I just have to miss out on an incredible part of adult life. I'll never have a husband to share a special relationship with. I'll never have a baby. I might like to adopt and/or foster. Even if I could have children, I think I'd like to do that. It just feels like from my own stupidity and selfishness, I've deffinitely lost this incredible chance that most people get.

I know that God still has amazing things in store for me. But it's hard to come to terms with losing this piece of my possible future and identity. How would you deal with it if you were me? I don't know. I hope it helps to at least get this off of my chest.

 

[OGM]

I don't understand what is going on.

 

[birernest]

If I were you, I would pray that God gave me the strength, HIS STRENGTH to deal with this situation. Only God knows exactly what you are feeling every hour, every minute, every second, of the day. He loves you very much. Also know that GOD IS A HEALER AND A RESTORER, THERE IS NOTHING TOO HARD FOR HIM.

 

[birernest]

If I were you, I would ask God for strength, HIS strength. Only God knows what you are feeling every hour, every minute, every second, of the day. Know that HE IS A HEALER AND A RESTORER, THERE IS NOTHING TOO HARD FOR HIM.

 

[red8]

what ever you are facing don't think for the moment you are alone and no body cares. Here is the the thing sis, a long time go before this world came to exist God knows what, how, where, when and why things happen to you. They might be your fault or not what ever it is it happened and the next things that are coming on your way are still known by GOD. The more you focus on God than the situation around you the more you become happy and peaceful. Jesus said "Why do you worry about tomorrow leave tomorrow for tomorrow . . . " what i am trying to say is that you don't know about your unrevealed tomorrows so don't get worried or disturbed cos our GOD will come at the last moment when you have given up all the hope and strength. But still he has the best timing and blessing. Look at Sara and Abraham God came when they are old and weak but gave them the best blessing that could ever be given to a family. See the longer you wait for GOD the more your blessing gets sweet. Anyways sis please try not to worry even though things seem to drive you to that way cos Jesus stands beside you to lift your burdens if you let him. Be open and honest to him, tell him everything even though you know that he knows. He brings the dead to life just show him and tell him and he will give life to the dead thing in you. And know always that GOD IS FAR BEYOND BETTER THAN ANY GREAT SPECIALIST OR DOCTOR THAT EVER LIVE THIS EARTH. just tell him honestly and wait for him. he will come hope to hear from you may God bless you in his infinite love and peace

 

[OGM]

The end result is that I can't have sex, or get married, or have children, or have a "normal" family life when I grow up.

I am not sure why you say you can’t even marry but many who get married and have children don’t have a “normal” family life either. Many who can have not found the right person yet

It's not that I don't have a future or good things ahead; I just have to miss out on an incredible part of adult life. I'll never have a husband to share a special relationship with. I'll never have a baby. I might like to adopt and/or foster. Even if I could have children, I think I'd like to do that.

There are many children just waiting to be placed in a loving home.

I know that God still has amazing things in store for me. But it's hard to come to terms with losing this piece of my possible future and identity. How would you deal with it if you were me? I don't know. I hope it helps to at least get this off of my chest.

Like you said, God still has amazing things in store for you! Do you have a Pastor, family member or friends you can talk this over with?

 

[GambitTheIntellectual]

I don't think you guys realize the reason why he can't do what "normal" people can. I know what it is, or rather have an idea. However, I won't say it because he might not what it stated. If it is right that is.

 

[Rolande]

Hiv?